Wires 25 Posted January 20, 2014 their WLS track like this....always feeling insecure? I'm at the start of my WLS road, just getting my initial appts in before the sleeve. All of our years of being married I've felt insecure but even more so since I've slowly gained weight over time. I basically let my insecurities ruin our time (i.e. I will get so upset that someone he works with is really good looking--skinny etc) and it creates arguments/stress for us. I hate myself for doing that. I need to get over the fact that he may find other people attractive, he has done nothing to make me feel insecure though, it's definitely coming more from me. I guess this doesn't totally have to do with WLS but of someone who is obese with a healthy & good looking partner. Anyone else? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RJ'S/beginning 5,358 Posted January 20, 2014 When I was younger..I felt like that. but as I got older I began to realize that he was still here so he must want to be here. He has been with me through every nightmare and pain and happiness I have felt for 36 years. Actually 38 years. Then one day I thought if he strays then that will be his choice because I would stay with him if he lost an arm or had a stroke...So it all became his choice and mine to go on... Then I stopped thinking about it and enjoyed the time we had and have together and decided what I would be able to take and what would cause us to break up.... Then i thought..Well if someone wants him they can have him...And that's where I stand today on the matter!!!!! Maybe it is because I am 55 and don't take bull anymore.... 2 ProudGrammy and 1sunnuri reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1sunnuri 77 Posted January 20, 2014 Been there have done all the above. Jealousy is still not beyond me recently had a severe case of it "like the flu" but it only took me a short time to come back to reality. It was a new relationship early in my journey and his job requires him to interact with lots of women. I became jealous. .then I came to my senses and realized that I am a hell of a woman and if I'm not enough for him than its his lose. I also realized I was giving him power over my emotions. I took my power back..lol life is just to damn short to waste time on such an ugly emotion. 1 BethinPA reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrsVanderbilt 29 Posted January 28, 2014 My husband goes to the gym religiously 4 days a week. He's done that for over 15 years and has put on about 50 pounds of muscle. He's in great shape. Me on the other hand, I've put on 100 pounds of fat and sometimes it seems weird to be the fat wife of a fit guy. I can't wait to be smaller than him. Or at least his size! 3 butterfyeffect, Kate2014 and LindafromFlorida reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
erp 2,016 Posted January 28, 2014 My guy works out a few days a week at the gym and has for many years. Even so he has bad eating habits so he is probably 30 lbs overweight. Before surgery I weighed 20 pounds more than him, now I am more physically fit than he is and I weigh about 85 pounds less than him. This will happen for you too. :-) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sassypants 674 Posted February 5, 2014 the guy i have been seeing on and off for the past 5 years is hot handsome works out total package even if i do say so myself lol but no really everyone thinks hes lovely, hes been with me from 350lbs up to 425lbs and now throughout till i am now just over 200lbs now he thinks i have no clue how i look and he is not good enough for me any more that i can have anyone i want and some day soon i will realise this and off i go. he is constantly on a diet and goes to the gym, let me tell you this man is not fat at all hes muscluar and soild and not even a big soild but my change is size has triggered his insecruites about himself. i never felt insecure around him at any point its a bit of a curve ball to have this lovely guy who could get anyone he wanted feel insecure and not good enough for me now. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
feedyoureye 3,087 Posted February 8, 2014 the guy i have been seeing on and off for the past 5 years is hot handsome works out total package even if i do say so myself lol but no really everyone thinks hes lovely, hes been with me from 350lbs up to 425lbs and now throughout till i am now just over 200lbs now he thinks i have no clue how i look and he is not good enough for me any more that i can have anyone i want and some day soon i will realise this and off i go. he is constantly on a diet and goes to the gym, let me tell you this man is not fat at all hes muscluar and soild and not even a big soild but my change is size has triggered his insecruites about himself. i never felt insecure around him at any point its a bit of a curve ball to have this lovely guy who could get anyone he wanted feel insecure and not good enough for me now. Oh! Thats sad and sweet, I'm sure you let him know how awesome he is and all.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sassypants 674 Posted February 16, 2014 Oh! Thats sad and sweet, I'm sure you let him know how awesome he is and all.... the guy i have been seeing on and off for the past 5 years is hot handsome works out total package even if i do say so myself lol but no really everyone thinks hes lovely, hes been with me from 350lbs up to 425lbs and now throughout till i am now just over 200lbs now he thinks i have no clue how i look and he is not good enough for me any more that i can have anyone i want and some day soon i will realise this and off i go. he is constantly on a diet and goes to the gym, let me tell you this man is not fat at all hes muscluar and soild and not even a big soild but my change is size has triggered his insecruites about himself. i never felt insecure around him at any point its a bit of a curve ball to have this lovely guy who could get anyone he wanted feel insecure and not good enough for me now. oh i do Share this post Link to post Share on other sites