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Jealous ? Resentful ? Spouse just stunned the HELL out of me !



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Curvy, I messaged you...

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I am sorry your husband is not supportive or proud of you, you should be proud of your success. A husband should love you unconditionly and support you not belittle you or be embarrassed to be seen with you. It is sad that he is so insecure in himself he has to act like ass to feel better about himself- a real man would be proud of his wife and want to show it the world. I have been on both sides of that fence and I prefer to have a caring and loving husband who supports me. My ex husband was very much the same way and it made my self esteem go in the toilet. It is your life and you are the only one who can create happiness, don't give him the power to take it away.

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Curvy, I messaged you...

Good for u!! Luv urself, always!!! <3

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My situation was different.... but I had lost 125 # - huge right? My partner (long term live in relationship) hadn't said a word. Not a compliment, not an awknowledgement. One day I asked him... shyly... if he noticed that I was looking better. He kinda rolled his eyes at me and told me in a dismissive tone that he had always thought I was attractive. On the one hand, that was kind, but on the other hand, it completely invalidated my entire transformation.

I stewed on that for quite some time, but I started peeling the layers of that onion... and eventually realized that i was in a relationship that had been "dead" for years. Had nothing to do with my weight so losing weight didn't help any at all....

In my own mind, I thought our relationship problems had to do with me being grossly fat. nope.

I am single now.

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I think everyone here has hit the nail on the head, and I also think you are very perceptive and have a good handle on your situation. That's a great start. What I see is that you are gaining confidence, and he does not like it. His behavior is not new, and he has not changed, but YOU have, so good for you! He is running out of ways to beat you down, and therefore, his behavior seems to be is escalating.

Only you know your true situation, but I would be contacting some of those places for guidance. I don't know if he would ever hit you, but I doubt if he's ever going to be a good man to you. If you decide to leave, I would be making my escape plan in secrecy as quickly as possible, and just try to keep a lid on things. If you know you are leaving, there is no sense in upsetting this apple cart and risking further escalation. Let him think he's put you in your place so that when you make your escape, he doesn't see it coming.

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As a guy... I can tell you he's acting like that because he's super insecure and jealous as hell now. That's toxic for the relationship.. you need to confront him about it and see what he says... he'll either change or maybe he needs some time away to figure out what he really wants.

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