in a funk....

[intelirish 714]

so as i wasn't sure what to title this i thought i'd start writing first with the hope it would come to me as i typed. I've been banded 4mts now and am down almost 40lbs. when i share that number with folks they go WOW that is a LOT.. the small voice in the back of my head go YES it is.. so why is it i find that i can take no joy from my success. that when i get on the scale and see that it has hardly moved the urge to cry is almost uncontrollable. I know i need to bury the scale... but having it helps keep me accountable to myself..

it doesn't help that i scared the heck out of myself last night i got home starting and inhaled my dinner.. yes i know that's a big no no.. but any way later on the cough the pain in my stomach/port was almost unbearable and in fact i was getting up to call the doc as i was that worried when i burped.... and guess what the pain decreased almost right away.. by bed time it was almost completely gone the office confirmed this am it was just trapped gas that eating quickly will 1.. sometimes cause stuck moments or 2 can lead to too much air being ingested which will cause gas....

i'm just sure when i went from being on such a high from having the surgery and seeing the first big loss in years to this sad mopey person.. can some one just kick me?

any one else feeling this?

well i guess i just wanted rant for a while. typign and reading what i wrote already makes me want to shake myself

Edited January 16, 2014 by intelirish

[Kezzer 4]

Sorry you are feeling so low, sometimes you just need to vent and you feel better. It's only been 6 days since I had my sleeve, and so far I'm ok, but there is a part of me that thinks what on earth have I done. In the year prior to my surgery I had lost 70lbs, but I realised that I could just as easily put it all back on and more without some intervention.

[LindafromFlorida 1,542]

Intelirish, I can relate to your feelings. Most people think I am upbeat all the time but the health problems that lead us to WLS can really get us down. The surgery will change our bodies but not our moods so much. I always say we women are just worriers, period. My scale moves slowly, and sometimes I wonder if I was really sleeved. I, like you, had a choking problem eating a soft piece of chicken too quickly without chewing enough. Scared me to death. Thought I was having a real heart attack. Good job on your weight loss, keep talking, things will work out. Get your mind set on how wonderful life will be when Spring comes. Being outdoors in the sunshine has me getting excited to think about it! Best wishes!

[jennybean 175]

Me too and you are doing much better then I am. I believe it will happen...just keep going!! This is for life!

[SuperFab 689]

And don't forget, estrogen is stored in fat and as you burn fat, that estrogen is released. As you lose your hormones are crazy. This is normal. Don't beat yourself up over it. Take it day by day and you'll feel better.

[intelirish 714]

thanks guys.. i know it's crazy to feel this way - in my heart i know i'm looking and feeling so much better it's really driving me crazy i can't be happy about it. as you all said one day at a time.

[moonlitestarbrite 902]

you might be depressed. call your regular doc for an appt. best to not ignore it. have you ever been to counseling?