reality check

[girliegirl 49]

i seem to be in a daze of some sort. I can't believe I'm actually going to take the steps that will get me closer to a surgery date. my mom asked me the other day if i were going to have it done or not. I said I'm just taking it one day/test at a time. sounds weird, but I'm scared to admit it to myself. is this happening? i know i need it, but i really struggle with the voices inside my head that say, just try it one more time on your own, or you can do it yourself, or your not big enough. anyone else know what I'm experiencing???

[Teachamy 1,042]

Not me. Once I realized this surgery could rid me of sleep apnea, high blood glucose levels, asthma symptoms, high cholesterol and hbp, I was ready to try it. I also read an article where a doctor said to his patient, "Look around you, how many 70 year olds do you see that are as heavy as you?" Not many. And most of those that do survive are plagued with everything I already have plus an increased risk for heart disease and cancer! I want to live a long, happy life, and I wanted that new life to begin as soon as possible!

That being said, your hesitations and questions are totally valid. We all go through some amount of soul searching before taking this step. i hope you find the right option for you!

[woo woo 872]

It may just be your process, but it also may be that you are not ready yet. Only you know the answer, but it's worth really taking a long hard look if you are truly unsure or not ready.

Then again, it could just be that it's not really "real" to you yet. In which case I think that's a pretty common feeling.

Just my thoughts, good luck to you whatever you decide!!

[RJ'S/beginning 5,358]

I know exactly what you mean and so do a lot of people on this forum....I was terrified up until I was called..then I did a complete turn around and could not wait..Sorta had this euphoria about it..

I think what you feel is normal and most people feel apprehensive right up until they put you out for the procedure. you have to ride it through, think if you can do it one more time on your own..Think of your health and what the future may hold if you do this or you don't...

All the best...keep us posted..K

[McButterpants 2,846]

I considered weight loss surgery for years - just dipped my toe in, not really researching it in depth. This time was different. I told my husband I wanted to go to the initial seminar to learn about it. A couple of weeks later I went to an appointment with the doc and made my decision that day to have surgery.

From that day, 08/21/13 to my surgery date, 11/14/13, I had many moments of thinking "What are you doing?" "Are you sure you want to do this?" "Have you tried hard enough on your own?" "Why are you doing this?" But I always came back to the fact I was losing myself in the extra weight I was carrying. I didn't like my life and I didn't like myself. My rational mind knew I needed to change and I wasn't going to do it on my own.

I think it's normal to go thru this process with questions and concerns. This is a life changer.

I had 2nd thoughts the day before surgery and the day of surgery in admitting. I almost walked out. I was scared. But at that moment I thought about all the reasons I wanted to do this - my family, my quality of life, my health, etc.

This was the best decision I have made - I've had great days and I have had really crappy days since surgery. But, if I had to do it all over again, I absolutely would.

Best of luck to you!

[Miss Mac 6,262]

Please don't wait until your quality of life is so affected that you are housebound with a litany of afflictions that are life threatening. I have been trying to do this on my own since the late 1970's. For most of us in our 50's and 60's, it did not get any better. So, three weeks ago, I was almost as round as I was tall.

If you think this surgery would give you a fresh start at living your life rather than just existing from day to day, by all means get informed and do what you have to do to get healthy and happy.

[girliegirl 49]

Thank you all for those word. thats what I need to hear every so often. I am sick and tired of being this heavy. I know I can't do it by myself, I can't lose it all without help. I have had the lap band in the past and I know the problems I had with the band make me really afraid of the sleeve. I'm worrying about things that might not even happen to me. I have been in research mode for almost 2 years and i think i researched everything I can right now. I have the support of my husband and dear friend and my mother. My father would rather me not do it and do it on my own so thats why I think Ive been procrastinating this past year, trying that one more time just for him, but in reality Im wasting time and its time to do for me now! ill keep you posted on my progress!! I met with a few doctors and i ended up really liking 2 of them. it was a hard choice but Im picking one over the other because he seems to have more experience if they are issues.

[McButterpants 2,846]

I'll tell you a story about my dad - my dad was vocal about his concern for the surgery. My husband, after he did his research was all for it and my mom, who has struggled with her weight her whole adult life was energetic.

My dad, however, was skeptical. He teared up when I explained to him how the surgery worked and what life would be like post-op. He knows I have a love for food and I love cooking food for other people - it has always brought great joy to my life. Knowing this, he asked, "Are you going to be able to go without all those foods you love?" My response was, "Dad, I have had enough bread for a lifetime. It's time for me to stop."

Since surgery, he sees how I'm happy with the changes in my body. He marvels at how little I eat, but am satisfied. He asks more questions than anyone about what it feels like and how certain foods feel in my stomach. He works out at the same gym I do and he watches my progress. It's really pretty cool to see him change his opinion.

He now looks at the surgery as a "medical procedure" where before he had the opinion that it was the easy way out.

Our dads are still trying to protect us and that's OK, that's their job.

[nursebeccarn 26]

I had the same feelings! "OMG am I actually going through with this a second time?!" I knew that I needed to put aside everyone else's judgements and do what was right for me. Our family can sometimes be the greatest source of hurt. My family, including my long term boyfriend didn't understand why I needed to do this. "Are you sure you need to cut out most of our stomach?! You're not that heavy!", "I love you no matter what."

After all is said and done, they have become very supportive and see my progress and how happy I am with my choice. People who don't struggle with their weight don't understand so I explained it to my mom that it's no different than people getting a boob job or a knee replacement. We all have our reasons.

[girliegirl 49]

i think he is just afraid for me. he is afrid of complications. so am I, but I'm going to put my faith in God and pray for the best for me. My father doesn't have a weight issue so I know he doesn't truly understand how difficult it is to lose a large amount of weight. thanks for everyone sharing their stories, it helps!