I have failed staying on every other diet. What makes this different?

[bandmomtb 8]

I am a 42F in the pre-op process, been in the 230-290 range for the past 15 years.

Just need an endoscopy mid-Jan to be scheduled. Likely will be having surgery in February.

I have seen other threads where people say this isn't the magic bullet or the secret answer to weight loss.

So why do it? I am not questioning my own decision as I am moving forward, but my worry brain keeps me awake at night

saying "You've been unable to lose weight before, Are you really going to succeed this time?"

Thats why I am limiting who I tell because I am afraid I will somehow fail.

Yet with 75%-85% of my stomach dissapearing, how can I fail? My body is going to be helping me this time, right?

For those of you that have done this, what made this different than everything you tried and failed in the past?

[SuzyB 182]

I am post op,and still worry about it. I have tried every diet that came out. This was my last option. The sleeve helps immensely, but I still have to do the work. I still have to wrap my head the fact everyday I have to make good choices. Do I screw up and make poor choices sometimes yes but I have to move forward each day.

[Arts137 1,811]

learn all you can about the process, the preps and your plan. Commit now to succeed at all the preps required... stop smoking, reduce/eliminate caffine, reduce/eliminate carbonated drinks, record food intake and activity...

Have you figured out your particular "poisons"? Mine are sugars and simple/processed carbs - I just have to avoid them!

And lastly:

"You've been unable to lose weight before, Are you really going to succeed this time?"

That's your fat brain talking. You'll likely be fighting with your fat brain a lot in the years ahead. My fat brain is named Skippy and he is a continual pain in my butt.

[Mrs.RRn 2,111]

YOU make it different. It's not a diet or a program.. It's a big lifestyle change. You have to make healthy decisions every day, and follow your doctors plan. When others say its a tool, that is so right!

I think the mental preparation is key to this.

[southernsoul 773]

For me personally, feeling full has made a big difference as well as being able to eat full fat foods. I usually was always hungry when I was on a diet & that would wear me down eventually. Also, most lowfat or fat free foods have sugars added to replace the fat removed & that screws up your body with increased carbs. My postop eating plan is built around fresh whole foods that I cook myself. I don't eat a lot of processed foods, but I don't feel like I have to avoid fats like olive oil, nuts, or real butter. I feel full & satisfied when I eat & my progress is keeping me motivated. Yes, I have to make good choices every day, but it somehow seems easier to do with my sleeve to help me.

[Georgia 2,908]

You can only fail if you want to fail. VSG isn't a magic bullet like you said but it's pretty close!! lol. At least for me it was! I've lost 110 pounds and 3 1/2 years out. Still have great restriction and feel that I can truly stay slim and healthy IF I make the right food choices 90%+ of the time.

I did regain about 27 pounds at around 3 years because of too many slider, junk foods. Got myself in line, found a good lifestyle for me (5:2( and lost the 27 PLUS additional 10. As Phil says, "happy, happy happy!" You can and WILL be a success!

[gamergirl 4,610]

I worried about this a lot. I also worried that other people lost on these other diets I failed on, why would I succeed this time? I worried I would cut out 85% of my stomach and still be that medical marvel that couldn't lose weight.

I will tell you my one regret which is that I tried every diet, but I never tried a modified Atkins where I gave up carbs. I was extremely carb addicted and I couldn't make myself give them up. Always had a good excuse why I didn't need to give them up. I wish I had tried that so I would know how much of my current weight loss is due to the sleeve and how much of it is due to low carbs because that is after all, what the post-sleeve diet is for most of your life.

Having said that, the main thing that works is the reduction of calories. I used to be hungry on 1000-1200 calories, and there is no way one can stay hungry endlessly without giving in to food at some point. With the sleeve, I can eat under 800 calories and not be hungry.

BUT, that's only true if I eat Protein first and restrict junk food. Honestly, I haven't had junk food so I don't know but I can read what others post and know better than to try it. I do have to control what I eat for the rest of my life. I'm only 4-5 months out and I know this will change, but for now, the fact that I'm not a) starving and sugar-crashing from eating carbs, makes it easier to control my intake.

I would strongly suggest eating like a sleever--except higher calories of course--now to see how your life might be. The hunger did go away when I stopped eating carbs, although it was 3-4 days of hell. Once i detoxed from it though? best feeling in the world.

Rest assured we all worry that we won't lose weight. At first, it's not difficult to lose weight. As best I can tell, it's not re-gaining it where the discipline and the new habits have to kick in.

[Texasmeg 568]

I am still pre-op, but it seems to me that this process, as extreme as it is, can be a journey of the mind to help you understand and manage your relationship with food. At least, I hope so.

[bandmomtb 8]

Thanks. I definitely need to reaffirm these thoughts into this process. I appreciate all you are sharing :-)

[Arts137 1,811]

I am still pre-op, but it seems to me that this process, as extreme as it is, can be a journey of the mind to help you understand and manage your relationship with food. At least, I hope so.

By Jove, you've got it! You've really got it!!!!!

[endless80 697]

I've been using the word balance a lot. I feel like this surgery helped me to find some. Yes, I am not always perfect... in fact I am sitting here eating a small lasagna right now as I type this but I don't feel bad about it. You know why? Because I know when to put the fork down (in most situations anyways). I feel like I've been on nothing but diets for the past 15 years. Now I can eyeball what foods will work and not work and usually which ones I can eat and which ones my sleeve doesnt like. I'm getting better at it everyday.

Balance to me is 3 chicken nuggets instead of a 20 piece. There are days I eat really really well and days I don't. BIG DEAL. I hate "diets". Some folks need that restriction because of food addictions but I needed something to slow me down and make me THINK about the food I was eating instead of being a bottomless, never satisfied, pit of culinary despair. Everyone does this for their own reasons. That's mine.

Edited December 27, 2013 by endless80

[Fluffnomore 1,235]

The adjustment in physical hunger and the payback when you eat too much have both been incredible helps to me. Between that, and hopefully the adjustments in how and what I eat, I hope that this will be very different indeed from the past.

Why is it the same? I'm still the one doing the grocery shopping, choosing whether or not to read the labels, make good choices. I'm still the one holding the fork. I'm still the one listening to my brain try to justify something that I know is not a good choice. I was in costco this afternoon reading labels as I waited for my car to get done. I mean, reading labels, making calculations, and ultimately putting a hell of a lot of stuff back. I was hungry because I hadn't had lunch and got a flat tire on my way home. The samples were mostly carb bombs and that is not the most sleeve-friendly food court. So I didn't eat there.

I thought about justifying a hot dog, or ordering a brisket sandwich and eating the insides. The sleeve is able to basically help me say, "There are better choices at home. I can hold off an hour or two." Because a hot dog might not settle well. I didn't have any way to measure the brisket and I learned the hard way that my guesstimating skills are not there yet.

But 3 months ago, I might have easily said, "Eff this" and eaten what I wanted. So there's the physical "eek, this might not go so well" as well as the physical "I'm not DYING of hunger here. I can wait." That is what I've gotten out of it, anyway.

But there ain't nothing that shuts your brain off. Your brain likes to tell you that you deserve a treat, that you will do something "just this once" and your brain is an amazing justifier. Virtually all of our brains are like this or we wouldn't be here. I love Arts' "Skippy." I also think of mine as a 3 year old who is pouting and saying, "I work so hard." You have to kind of laugh at that mental image, right?

[gamergirl 4,610]

But there ain't nothing that shuts your brain off. Your brain likes to tell you that you deserve a treat, that you will do something "just this once" and your brain is an amazing justifier. Virtually all of our brains are like this or we wouldn't be here. I love Arts' "Skippy." I also think of mine as a 3 year old who is pouting and saying, "I work so hard." You have to kind of laugh at that mental image, right?

Nothing like a Skippy-Trippy brain. That's the same brain that says "just this once" but conveniently "forgets" how often you say just this once. It's the training and the brain that says we reward ourselves with food after a tough day. The pouty three year is alive and well and demanding.

But that same brain can teach you new habits. The habits I am working on now are to not eat after 8 pm, and when I want something that tastes good, drink something instead. Both better for me, both with low or no calories. I'm sipping on Rooibos Chai right now. We just bought a variety of flavored teas to help me get in my liquids and satisfy some exotic tastes.

So yeah, you do spend a lot of the recovery time retraining yourself.

Again, it's not the weight loss that's tough, it's the maintaining for the rest of your life without getting bored, distracted, or "just this once" that's difficult I think.

[bandmomtb 8]

Thanks so much! I have to lose 14 pounds before my surgery and it's so hard staying on track. Its leaving me feeling a little worried.

[weeziex2 25]

I know for my self I am a 57 F, who has tried every diet in the book and failed. It took my health to jar me awake and the Dr telling me if I didn't loose it I would be dead in seven yrs. Some times I slip up like at two am this morning I woke up and got the lat peice of pepparoni pizza ate it cold sitting in the dark. But today I have made good food choices. We have to do our best to make good choices, if we mess up get back on the horse so to speak, don't give up and throw up your hands and say oh well I screwed up I might as well anything I want. No that's what we used to do what did we go thru such a drastic surgery if we'er going to give up so easily. I know personally for my self it was a hard desicion to make, and I know that I will enviably screw up and eat something I shouldn't eat but we are only human and we'er going to make mistakes. The sleeve can only help so far we have to make the best choices that we can make.