female only Hubby issues

[sapMegan 79]

Alright ladies. It seems like the more weight comes off the more uncomfortable hubby and I are with each other. I feel like I'm more vulnerable and paranoid and he's been paranoid since this whole thing started. We just aren't understanding each other well anymore, even though we have long talks most every night.

Are there any others of you that are noticing a change in dynamics between you and your significant other? How are you dealing with it?

[Roo101769 742]

Ok, I have to be honest here. I am not married, I am single. But I can answer to part of your post. I am more self conscience of my body now than I ever was fat. Now granted, once I hit 316lbs it was becoming a big issue. But when I was maintaining around 280-290lbs ( for a few years) I was pretty self confident. But now I weigh less than I have in at least 10 years and I am more self conscience than ever! The fat is shrinking but it is leaving behind dimpled and excess skin. Not to mention my scars from surgery that criss cross my abdomen are still red and angry looking. I cannot imagine anyone seeing me naked at this point. While I am dressed I do look ok, it is just the thought of what I look like undressed that freezes me up. I am scared to death to even contemplate that notion right now. So I may understand how you feel. As far as your hubby...I can only take a guess and assume he doesn't know how to act. You and he were in the same place at the same time when you first got to know each others bodies. But now yours is changing, quickly. While you are learning it, he may feel afraid to. The body you had is gone. ( the one he knew) The body you have right now is only momentary. If he really likes it he might be disappointed when it too is gone. It is good to know you two can talk, that has to be helpful. I hope you can find someone out there that has more insight and might be able to help. The best of luck on working it all out!!!

[No game 14,437]

I think even though I feel and look so much better and everything should be "improved" I feel my relationship with my husband is going through growing pains...

Yesterday I asked if he still liked me and he said "I'm just trying figure out who you are, I feel like I don't know you anymore"

I have changed I guess.. I'm the same person and love my husband as much as I did before. But I'm a bit more vocal if I'm dissatisfied (don't have my food to comfort sooth anymore)

This process is so much more than just a physical one..

All we can do is keep taking and be honest with our feelings same with the spouses.

Marriages are full of peaks and valleys..

Alright ladies. It seems like the more weight comes off the more uncomfortable hubby and I are with each other. I feel like I'm more vulnerable and paranoid and he's been paranoid since this whole thing started. We just aren't understanding each other well anymore, even though we have long talks most every night. Are there any others of you that are noticing a change in dynamics between you and your significant other? How are you dealing with it?

[Ballermom 803]

Well over all things have been good with my relationship. But at times due to my rapid changes and our schedules we have had periods where we are not at our best. I would not over think it. It gets better. I'm planning things like buying new sexy underwear to get back on top I mean track. To spruce up things.

Wait are we in the powder room. Lol

Edited December 18, 2013 by Ballermom

[Ballermom 803]

I agree with Laura-Ven. Talking about it is best. To piggy back on Laura post

These are growing pains and I'm experiencing them too.

[No game 14,437]

Lol!! I may have missed the point of the thread

[gomekast 559]

I think even though I feel and look so much better and everything should be "improved" I feel my relationship with my husband is going through growing pains...

Yesterday I asked if he still liked me and he said "I'm just trying figure out who you are, I feel like I don't know you anymore"

I have changed I guess.. I'm the same person and love my husband as much as I did before. But I'm a bit more vocal if I'm dissatisfied (don't have my food to comfort sooth anymore)

This process is so much more than just a physical one..

All we can do is keep taking and be honest with our feelings same with the spouses.

Marriages are full of peaks and valleys..

I'm only 2 months post op but what Laura said is very similar with my situation with my husband.

I'm vocal about things now where as before I'd stay up late snacking the night away. He isn't sure how to cope and often finds me stand offish. Trying to adjust and keep things into perspective.

We try to just laugh things off and move on.