Venting ....stranger Remark Made Made Me Wonder

[readysetg070113 1,476]

I go to grocery store today and see my usual cashier who I haven't seen in 3 weeks. She comments on how great I look and how much weight I lost and asked are you doing it alone. Question made me think. As I don't publicize my band I said yes diet and exercise ... Yes I'm doing it alone I'm the sole person responsible for getting my ass to the gym and being aware of what I put in my mouth. Now for those who know about my wonderful friend bandy it helps me but the ultimate decision is mine. I decided if I wanted it I decide if I will get the fills or go to follow ups.i decide everyday how much I'm going move and how to eat!!! The band is a tool but it's not like bam I'm 70lbs lighter because I got the surgery I'm sure my good choices are helping n the band helps me to feel hunger so I eat less but I suppose I could eat when not hungry , drink milkshakes or any other "slider"foods but I don't I make good choices for me !!!

Just needed to vent now back to happy thoughts

[FLORIDAYS 3,040]

I go to grocery store today and see my usual cashier who I haven't seen in 3 weeks. She comments on how great I look and how much weight I lost and asked are you doing it alone. Question made me think. As I don't publicize my band I said yes diet and exercise ... Yes I'm doing it alone I'm the sole person responsible for getting my ass to the gym and being aware of what I put in my mouth. Now for those who know about my wonderful friend bandy it helps me but the ultimate decision is mine. I decided if I wanted it I decide if I will get the fills or go to follow ups.i decide everyday how much I'm going move and how to eat!!! The band is a tool but it's not like bam I'm 70lbs lighter because I got the surgery I'm sure my good choices are helping n the band helps me to feel hunger so I eat less but I suppose I could eat when not hungry , drink milkshakes or any other "slider"foods but I don't I make good choices for me !!! Just needed to vent now back to happy thoughts

To share or not to share is the million dollar question.... For a casual acquaintance like that I won't spill about the band as I don't have time to explain that while the band is a tool it in no way is the reason I lost all my weight. Sounds like you handled it well!! Best of luck on your journey!

[☠carolinagirl☠ 18,721]

YOU are the one losing weight and inches

you are eating better and exercising (and yes the band helps with the amount)

share that you are now no longer dieting and are living life by eating

GREAT post/thread......

not saying you had wl is a personal choice/decision

i agree with fl, you handled it fabulously.

[mrsto 2,925]

There have been many times where I wanted to "tell" about the surgery. But each of those times I stop myself. Too many (from ignorance on the subject) think that WLS is the easy way out; the surgery does all the work. I do not have the time or energy to educate these people, and it's easier to simply keep it to myself. The people who matter in my life, know about it.

All of us here know that the band doesn't do the work for us. It's just a tool to help us eat less, and stay satisfied for much longer on small amounts. Can we eat right through it? Absolutely…..I've done it. WE do the work, and I don't want to engage with anyone who doesn't understand that. Too much energy; energy that I can spend on more important things

Readygetgo - you handled that beautifully. I understand the casher's question, as I myself have asked the same of people I've seen drop a lot of weight. I always want to know what route they took; Weight Watchers, Atkins, simply eating less & exercising more… I'm always interested, because it's been my lifelong struggle. The reality is, no matter what path we take, we're ALWAYS doing it alone….even if we're going to a diet doctor! Every single choice of what we put in our mouth in any given moment, is a choice we make…alone. The band is no different than any other weight loss route.

Edited December 8, 2013 by mrsto

[LEXUS86985 21]

It is true that there are soooo many people who have had this surgery and NOT lost weight. It is a tool and all decisions are our own. I always tell people about the band for one reason.... It WORKS!!! So many people struggle with losing weight and if there is something that can help like it helped me then I want to promote it!! :-)

[mrsto 2,925]

It is true that there are soooo many people who have had this surgery and NOT lost weight. It is a tool and all decisions are our own. I always tell people about the band for one reason.... It WORKS!!! So many people struggle with losing weight and if there is something that can help like it helped me then I want to promote it!! :-)

If someone struggling with obesity asks me, I tell them. But anyone else…..I don't discuss it.

Once a year my next door neighbor has a holiday gathering at their house. It's a morning thing, and I hadn't seen many of the neighbors since the last gathering. Many of them acknowledged my weight loss, and when asked, I responded with "eat less, exercise more". And the bottom line is, that is exactly what I'm doing. The only person who knows about my surgery, is my next door neighbor on the other side of me. SHE had a lot to do with my decision to have the surgery. We lived here for a good three years before she and I got to talking, and she told me that she had gastric bypass surgery about 8 years prior. I was shocked, because I had no idea that she was ever morbidly obese. A couple of year ago, she had to have a tune up to that surgery, and the doctor who did it, ended up being the doc I went to for my surgery. Anyway…..she knows, but no one else "needs" to know. Anyone obese and struggling, I'm MORE than glad to share my experience.

Edited December 8, 2013 by mrsto

[SandyM 1,956]

If you used tools to rebuild an engine, you certainly would appreciate the fact that you had the tools to help, but you wouldn't give them the credit for doing the job. Good job and keep it up.

[Bandista 7,466]

Grocery cashiers are notorious for inappropriate questions -- I experienced so much asking about the brown child with the white lady. Is he yours, where is he "from" and even more intrusive, didn't you want one of your own......ack! I think you handled yourself beautifully. And alone but not alone cause, hey, there are all of us here with you!

[gowalking 10,790]

Grocery cashiers are notorious for inappropriate questions -- I experienced so much asking about the brown child with the white lady. Is he yours, where is he "from" and even more intrusive, didn't you want one of your own......ack! I think you handled yourself beautifully. And alone but not alone cause, hey, there are all of us here with you!

Not just cashiers Bandista. My folks are very close to a former employee of my dad's who's Jamaican. Us kids call him 'the good son' because he calls my dad more than my brother does..lol. Anyway...Carl comes to visit my folks fairly often as his folks are also in Florida and sometimes my mom and dad take his son for an afternoon so Carl and his wife can have some couple time. My folks are white, and Marcel is brown. My mom says she gets funny looks plenty..especially from her neighbors. If anyone she knows questions her, she just says, 'this is my grandson Marcel. Everyone says he looks just like me.' It works every time...

[mrsto 2,925]

If you used tools to rebuild an engine, you certainly would appreciate the fact that you had the tools to help, but you wouldn't give them the credit for doing the job. Good job and keep it up.

Well said!

[mrsto 2,925]

Grocery cashiers are notorious for inappropriate questions -- I experienced so much asking about the brown child with the white lady. Is he yours, where is he "from" and even more intrusive, didn't you want one of your own......ack! I think you handled yourself beautifully. And alone but not alone cause, hey, there are all of us here with you!

OMG, Bandista - in what state did you get this comment?? I'm floored! Maybe living in SoCal most all of my life, this shocks the hell out of me. You would never hear that sh-t coming out of someones mouth here.

[mrsto 2,925]

Grocery cashiers are notorious for inappropriate questions -- I experienced so much asking about the brown child with the white lady. Is he yours, where is he "from" and even more intrusive, didn't you want one of your own......ack! I think you handled yourself beautifully. And alone but not alone cause, hey, there are all of us here with you!

Not just cashiers Bandista. My folks are very close to a former employee of my dad's who's Jamaican. Us kids call him 'the good son' because he calls my dad more than my brother does..lol. Anyway...Carl comes to visit my folks fairly often as his folks are also in Florida and sometimes my mom and dad take his son for an afternoon so Carl and his wife can have some couple time. My folks are white, and Marcel is brown. My mom says she gets funny looks plenty..especially from her neighbors. If anyone she knows questions her, she just says, 'this is my grandson Marcel. Everyone says he looks just like me.' It works every time...

LOVE it!!

[readysetg070113 1,476]

Grocery cashiers are notorious for inappropriate questions -- I experienced so much asking about the brown child with the white lady. Is he yours, where is he "from" and even more intrusive, didn't you want one of your own......ack! I think you handled yourself beautifully. And alone but not alone cause, hey, there are all of us here with you!

People are so rude !!! And who ask questions like that. Fortunately I haven't encountered the comments because there would be hell to pay if you insult my niece or nephew like that

[readysetg070113 1,476]

Grocery cashiers are notorious for inappropriate questions -- I experienced so much asking about the brown child with the white lady. Is he yours, where is he "from" and even more intrusive, didn't you want one of your own......ack! I think you handled yourself beautifully. And alone but not alone cause, hey, there are all of us here with you!

Yes I'm

Not alone with all of you

[Bandista 7,466]

OMG, Bandista - in what state did you get this comment?? I'm floored! Maybe living in SoCal most all of my life, this shocks the hell out of me. You would never hear that sh-t coming out of someones mouth here.

NH, which may still be the whitest state. It's ignorance, basically, as so many people have not been exposed to a diverse population. We did live in CA for a time -- very different!