So Much On My Mind......

[DaddyMarie 291]

With everything that has been going on lately and all this weight loss surgery talk, I'm feeling very anxious... I have been second guessing my choice to do this, I am getting irritated waiting for insurance approval and then once I'm approved the fact that I don't know what happens next irritates me.. I think about when it could be and how my work is gonna take it. Im worried about how I will feel at work after the surgery. Will my energy levels be ok? Will I be able to make it through the day? Will people be supportive? Will I have this crappy dizzy ness everyone speaks of or acid reflux? Will I be nauseous all the time? Will I get dehydrated and pass out and have to be admitted into the Hospitol? Will I get an infection? An ulcer? What am I gonna do with my RA and Lupus and not be able to take my 800 mg Motrin? Will I develop back problems? Will my planters facetious get better? Will my Migraines go away or get better? Will my insurance even approve me?!

What have I gotten myself into?

[No game 14,437]

Have you met with the surgeon yet?<br> The first thing I did was make sure my insurance covered it. THEN I met with the surgeon for a consult to discuss the different surgeries and which one would be best for me and my circumstances. This is the time you talk about these concerns afterwards if you decide you want it then you put in for approval. <br> I

[DaddyMarie 291]

I have not met with my surgeon yet.. My PCP has done the pre auth process with me and has send my paperwork in for approval. He did not want me to go to the surgeon without insurance approval because he did not want me to assume any unnecessary costs. I made sure before even talking to my PCP that the surgery was covered.

[No game 14,437]

That's azz backwards... Sorry

You can go for a consultation with the surgeon.

[DaddyMarie 291]

Well I already had a consult and did a few seminars with my last surgeon. (Ya know the one who said sleeves suck?) I will still have to do the consult with this new surgeon so I'm not worried about that. I'm just overwhelmed.

[No game 14,437]

Ok..... Good luck to you.

[DaddyMarie 291]

My insurance only requires 6 medically monitored NUT/WL visits with my PCP or the Surgeon. They don't care as long as it's a doctor.

[Dignity 26]

DaddyMarie, your post is an echo of my own fears as well.. There is so much left to the imagination. I too have changed my mind a couple of times. I verified before even starting this journey that my insurance would cover it, and am now in the 6 month supervised diet period required by my insursnce, however, I was told that I still have to be approved by insurance after completing the 6 month diet. Then there is a 2 month minimum wait to get a surgery date from the doc. Add to that the fact that my first consult appt. with the doc did not count as my first month of the 6 months, it will be 9 months I have waited......and still no surgery date! And no confirmation I will ever get one!! I need the surgery for several health reasons, plus just feeling poorly.....pretty discouraged right now..... I know I did not get fat overnight but I feel like I am one day closer to an early death, for every more I have to wait....

[DaddyMarie 291]

Well at least I know I am not alone. Thanks for that.... I just feel so frustrated and stressed out and anxious.... I was just reading my insurance coverage book and again it seems the pre auth is fairly simple... I just want to know something solid...

[TurnThePage 220]

This weekend I wrote a lengthy reply to a similar post. Pasting it below. Hope this helps. Italics are from the original poster.

I'm 8 days away from surgery, all my pre-op tests are over, the nutrition class, everything. There is nothing left to do now but keep on the pre-op diet and then the surgery. But I'm crying and I don't want to do it. I don't want them to cut me open and hurt me, I don't want to risk nutritional deficiencies the rest of my life, I don't want to skip the bread at communion, I don't want to miss work for a month, I don't want to spend all day worried about getting enough Water, I don't want years of follow up appointments to make sure my bones aren't frail, I don't want any of it. I'm not diabetic, my cholesterol and blood pressure are fine, I have no trouble walking, I'm just fat. I know I'm at risk for all sorts of things but they're all maybes at this point. Going through with the surgery is a sure fire road to pain, discomfort, and fretting about sugar and fat in food forever. I don't want to have to care so much about three teaspoons of sugar giving me the dumps or whatever it's called. I can't help but think it's insane for someone with no health problems to have tens of thousands of dollars spent paying someone to painfully disable the normal function of her perfectly working digestive system. Insane.

I don't think I've ever seen so many misconceptions and so much misinformation about WLS in one place! No wonder you're concerned. Let me try to set some things straight.

Yes, surgery means the doctor will make about 5 or 6 incisions for the laproscopic tools. Mine ranged in size from 1/4 to about 1 inch. Internal stitches, surgical glue on the outside.

Hurt? Not really, not for most people. I had pain meds the morning after surgery and did not need or want any meds after that. Mid-section was a bit tender for a week, but similar to if I had bumped into the corner of a table and bruised myself. Other people have different experiences, depending on their bodies, but that was mine. The people that post on forums about pain issues are a small subset of a much, much larger group of post-op patients, so their experiences are not typically. It's good to learn about potential issues so you can deal with them if they arise, but that has to be balanced with the understanding that complications are relatively rare. There is no point in wasting time and energy and emotion on things that do not actually happen to YOU.

Month off of work? Nope. Back at my desk job one week later. However, I did make time for lunch hour naps and went to bed about an hour earlier each night for the first month, to give my body the best chance to heal quickly. Most people seem to take 2-4 weeks off, but a lot depends on how strenuous their jobs are.

Nutritional deficiencies? Not if I take my Vitamins and supplements and eat healthy food for the rest of my life. BUT I'd have to do that even if I tried to lose the weight by old fashioned methods. I expect to be less at risk of osteoporosis now because the surgery has made me more aware of the need for Calcium and I am much more diligent about taking it now as a result.

Smaller portions? Yes, but not what you are suggesting. The big difference is that although you are eating much less, you don't have nearly the hunger you would have without WLS. Some people don't feel physical hunger again for a long time, making it even easier to be content with smaller portions initially. The first few days after surgery, you will be taking tiny sips of Water very frequently as your stomach heals, then you gradually increase the amount you drink each time until you are taking normal drinks.Took me about 4-6 weeks to get back to normal.You'll just take normal drinks of water to stay hydrated, just like you would if you didn't have surgery. That's not exactly a hardship, taking smaller drinks for a few weeks, is it? You may not want big gulps of water on a hot day if you have successfully changed your habits to drink throughout the day and you probably won't need big gulps of water to cool you if you are hauling around a much smaller body.

After surgery you have a restricted group of foods and very small portions for a few weeks while your tummy heals.You may be satisfied with a few spoonfuls of food at first. Then you work your way up to 1/4 and 1/2 cup servings. Long term, you may find a cup of food is a satisfying meal. (It is not much different than what normal healthy people eat. Just watch them.) However, you have little to no physical hunger for perhaps the first year or so while you learn new healthy eating habits, so it is not uncomfortable. You won't feel starved or deprived. Emotional or "head" hunger is a different issue and one you can work on as you shed your old habits and learn new ones. There is no reason you can't have a communion wafer; it won't hurt you in the least. Eating bread, however, is generally not a good idea as it tends to ball up in your pouch, be hard to digest and hard to eliminate. That doesn't mean you never eat it, you just figure out how much and how often you are comfortable eating it. Same things with birthday cake. It is very doable. Yes, this is a few weeks of sacrifice at the beginning, but you'd be eating lightly after the flu or any other physical change. You just have to keep in mind how this will all lead to being much healthier and more active and living longer.

At this time you may not have co-morbidities such as diabetes, heart trouble, damaged joints (at least that you are aware of as of yet)--but statistically you are very likely to develop one or more of these problems and probably before you are 40 or 50. Heart disease is the greatest killer of American women (yes, more than cancers) and much of that is due to obesity. My BMI never got much beyond 40 or 42 and yet I developed congestive heart failure which has greatly restricted my activities and will shorten my life, perhaps by a decade or more. Are you willing to take a similar risk? The number of joint replacements, especially for hips and knees, are soaring because of the obesity epidemic. The human skeleton was never intended to carry as much weight as people now carry. You have no idea how much every movement hurts every day until you have a hip or knee where all the cushioning has worn away and your joint consists of 2 bones rubbing and scraping against each other continually. Are you ready to risk not being able to walk more than 20 feet by age 50?

Going through with the surgery is a sure fire road to pain, discomfort, and fretting about sugar and fat in food forever.

Nope, wrong again! No way this is a "sure fire road" to these problems. Millions and millions of people worldwide have had RNY since the 1970s---much longer than you have been alive. Surely they cannot all have been ill-advised idiots. Somewhere along the line you have missed a great deal of research about the quality of life after surgery. Has it not occurred to you that this surgery would not be in such high demand if it caused all the problems you are citing? There are not that many masochists and fools in the world!!! You are also missing the point that the people who post on forums are the minority that are having issues and need help. They are NOT a representative sample of all people who have WLS. Most people have the surgery, change their habits and get on with their lives. They do not have the time or interest to stay on such websites, unless they are motivated to 'pay it forward', to try to help others going through the process. They do not have on-going pain or discomfort. You may never have to fret about sugar or fat in food causing dumping. Only about 30% of RNY patients dump. The rest of us are just trying to use our common sense and nutritional training to make good choices.

I can't help but think it's insane for someone with no health problems to have tens of thousands of dollars spent paying someone to painfully disable the normal function of her perfectly working digestive system.

Sorry, but you're wrong again! You DO have a serious health problem. You just haven't acknowledged your condition and/or other health problems have not noticeably manifested---yet. You are morbidly obese, which can be defined as Obesity is a medical condition in which excess body fat has accumulated to the extent that it may have an adverse effect on health, leading to reduced life expectancy and/or increased health problems. ....

Obesity is not a static, safe zone. Every day that you remain obese, you are shortening your life span, putting extra strain on your heart, major organs, joints and skeleton. Those components will wear out sooner and will cause you more pain over time as a result. You are at far, far greater risk for many illnesses which can be debilitating, disabling or perhaps fatal (with or without warning signs). If you think there is no measurable, physical cost to you to remain obese, you are sadly mistaken and there are a ton of statistics to back that up! Ask your doctors!

One alternative of course, is to try to lose the excess weight by diet and exercise. However, numerous studies have shown that only 2% to 5% of morbidly obese people are able to successfully lose their excess weight and maintain that weight loss over the long term by means of diet and exercise alone. Godspeed to you if you can manage it, but consider your success to date. You have a 95% chance of failing that protocol and continuing to have all the obesity-related health problems. Would you play those odds in Vegas?

Finally, there are the issues of emotional health and quality of life. Are there really jolly fat persons or is that just part of the Santa Claus myth? Most obese struggle with a host of issues from not being able to play with their kids, to job discrimination, social ostracism, frustration with narrow airplane seats and a million other daily battles. For most of us, WLS is the turning point in our lives where we finally take control of our weight, our health and our lives. Some of us do it with great ease and some have to work harder at it, but the majority are happy with their decision. It gives an incredible sense of empowerment. When asked about any regrets, the most common answer is they just wish they had done it sooner.

Whew! Didn't mean to write a novel, but felt it was important to try to clear some things up! All that said, if you are not prepared to have the surgery and make the life changes, then take a step back. It seems like you would benefit greatly from getting more information, particularly from more reliable sources than those that have filled your mind with misconceptions and misinformation. Cleveland Clinic, mayo Clinic, Johns Hopkins, ASMBS.org and other major medical groups are good sources of information and great places to start. Take some time to gather realistic information and process your thoughts and feelings about it. Discuss the risks of having surgery vs. not having surgeon in detail with your surgeon and your PCP. Talk with a therapist specializing in weight loss issues. Then make your decision. Wishing you all the best on your journey!

[Seela 1,187]

You are most certainly not alone! You posted earlier on a thread I needed help in (thank you) and I can tell you that even through all the stress and uncertainties of being approved, the pre op diet, losing 2 employees one eeek before surgery, hiring 3 new employees days before surgery, leaving my business in the hands of newbies, post op misery, going back to work with the energy of a half dead snail, losing my ins and my daughter getting hit by a car.. (whew!).. I don't regret a second of my decision to have this surgery. You can do this and we all have struggled along the way, most of us come out better on the other side (and Skinner too)!

[Noor1969 150]

This weekend I wrote a lengthy reply to a similar post. Pasting it below. Hope this helps. Italics are from the original poster.

I'm 8 days away from surgery, all my pre-op tests are over, the nutrition class, everything. There is nothing left to do now but keep on the pre-op diet and then the surgery. But I'm crying and I don't want to do it. I don't want them to cut me open and hurt me, I don't want to risk nutritional deficiencies the rest of my life, I don't want to skip the bread at communion, I don't want to miss work for a month, I don't want to spend all day worried about getting enough Water, I don't want years of follow up appointments to make sure my bones aren't frail, I don't want any of it. I'm not diabetic, my cholesterol and blood pressure are fine, I have no trouble walking, I'm just fat. I know I'm at risk for all sorts of things but they're all maybes at this point. Going through with the surgery is a sure fire road to pain, discomfort, and fretting about sugar and fat in food forever. I don't want to have to care so much about three teaspoons of sugar giving me the dumps or whatever it's called. I can't help but think it's insane for someone with no health problems to have tens of thousands of dollars spent paying someone to painfully disable the normal function of her perfectly working digestive system. Insane.

I don't think I've ever seen so many misconceptions and so much misinformation about WLS in one place! No wonder you're concerned. Let me try to set some things straight.

Yes, surgery means the doctor will make about 5 or 6 incisions for the laproscopic tools. Mine ranged in size from 1/4 to about 1 inch. Internal stitches, surgical glue on the outside.

Hurt? Not really, not for most people. I had pain meds the morning after surgery and did not need or want any meds after that. Mid-section was a bit tender for a week, but similar to if I had bumped into the corner of a table and bruised myself. Other people have different experiences, depending on their bodies, but that was mine. The people that post on forums about pain issues are a small subset of a much, much larger group of post-op patients, so their experiences are not typically. It's good to learn about potential issues so you can deal with them if they arise, but that has to be balanced with the understanding that complications are relatively rare. There is no point in wasting time and energy and emotion on things that do not actually happen to YOU.

Month off of work? Nope. Back at my desk job one week later. However, I did make time for lunch hour naps and went to bed about an hour earlier each night for the first month, to give my body the best chance to heal quickly. Most people seem to take 2-4 weeks off, but a lot depends on how strenuous their jobs are.

Nutritional deficiencies? Not if I take my Vitamins and supplements and eat healthy food for the rest of my life. BUT I'd have to do that even if I tried to lose the weight by old fashioned methods. I expect to be less at risk of osteoporosis now because the surgery has made me more aware of the need for Calcium and I am much more diligent about taking it now as a result.

Smaller portions? Yes, but not what you are suggesting. The big difference is that although you are eating much less, you don't have nearly the hunger you would have without WLS. Some people don't feel physical hunger again for a long time, making it even easier to be content with smaller portions initially. The first few days after surgery, you will be taking tiny sips of Water very frequently as your stomach heals, then you gradually increase the amount you drink each time until you are taking normal drinks.Took me about 4-6 weeks to get back to normal.You'll just take normal drinks of water to stay hydrated, just like you would if you didn't have surgery. That's not exactly a hardship, taking smaller drinks for a few weeks, is it? You may not want big gulps of water on a hot day if you have successfully changed your habits to drink throughout the day and you probably won't need big gulps of water to cool you if you are hauling around a much smaller body.

After surgery you have a restricted group of foods and very small portions for a few weeks while your tummy heals.You may be satisfied with a few spoonfuls of food at first. Then you work your way up to 1/4 and 1/2 cup servings. Long term, you may find a cup of food is a satisfying meal. (It is not much different than what normal healthy people eat. Just watch them.) However, you have little to no physical hunger for perhaps the first year or so while you learn new healthy eating habits, so it is not uncomfortable. You won't feel starved or deprived. Emotional or "head" hunger is a different issue and one you can work on as you shed your old habits and learn new ones. There is no reason you can't have a communion wafer; it won't hurt you in the least. Eating bread, however, is generally not a good idea as it tends to ball up in your pouch, be hard to digest and hard to eliminate. That doesn't mean you never eat it, you just figure out how much and how often you are comfortable eating it. Same things with birthday cake. It is very doable. Yes, this is a few weeks of sacrifice at the beginning, but you'd be eating lightly after the flu or any other physical change. You just have to keep in mind how this will all lead to being much healthier and more active and living longer.

At this time you may not have co-morbidities such as diabetes, heart trouble, damaged joints (at least that you are aware of as of yet)--but statistically you are very likely to develop one or more of these problems and probably before you are 40 or 50. Heart disease is the greatest killer of American women (yes, more than cancers) and much of that is due to obesity. My BMI never got much beyond 40 or 42 and yet I developed congestive heart failure which has greatly restricted my activities and will shorten my life, perhaps by a decade or more. Are you willing to take a similar risk? The number of joint replacements, especially for hips and knees, are soaring because of the obesity epidemic. The human skeleton was never intended to carry as much weight as people now carry. You have no idea how much every movement hurts every day until you have a hip or knee where all the cushioning has worn away and your joint consists of 2 bones rubbing and scraping against each other continually. Are you ready to risk not being able to walk more than 20 feet by age 50?

Going through with the surgery is a sure fire road to pain, discomfort, and fretting about sugar and fat in food forever.

Nope, wrong again! No way this is a "sure fire road" to these problems. Millions and millions of people worldwide have had RNY since the 1970s---much longer than you have been alive. Surely they cannot all have been ill-advised idiots. Somewhere along the line you have missed a great deal of research about the quality of life after surgery. Has it not occurred to you that this surgery would not be in such high demand if it caused all the problems you are citing? There are not that many masochists and fools in the world!!! You are also missing the point that the people who post on forums are the minority that are having issues and need help. They are NOT a representative sample of all people who have WLS. Most people have the surgery, change their habits and get on with their lives. They do not have the time or interest to stay on such websites, unless they are motivated to 'pay it forward', to try to help others going through the process. They do not have on-going pain or discomfort. You may never have to fret about sugar or fat in food causing dumping. Only about 30% of RNY patients dump. The rest of us are just trying to use our common sense and nutritional training to make good choices.

I can't help but think it's insane for someone with no health problems to have tens of thousands of dollars spent paying someone to painfully disable the normal function of her perfectly working digestive system.

Sorry, but you're wrong again! You DO have a serious health problem. You just haven't acknowledged your condition and/or other health problems have not noticeably manifested---yet. You are morbidly obese, which can be defined as Obesity is a medical condition in which excess body fat has accumulated to the extent that it may have an adverse effect on health, leading to reduced life expectancy and/or increased health problems. ....

Obesity is not a static, safe zone. Every day that you remain obese, you are shortening your life span, putting extra strain on your heart, major organs, joints and skeleton. Those components will wear out sooner and will cause you more pain over time as a result. You are at far, far greater risk for many illnesses which can be debilitating, disabling or perhaps fatal (with or without warning signs). If you think there is no measurable, physical cost to you to remain obese, you are sadly mistaken and there are a ton of statistics to back that up! Ask your doctors!

One alternative of course, is to try to lose the excess weight by diet and exercise. However, numerous studies have shown that only 2% to 5% of morbidly obese people are able to successfully lose their excess weight and maintain that weight loss over the long term by means of diet and exercise alone. Godspeed to you if you can manage it, but consider your success to date. You have a 95% chance of failing that protocol and continuing to have all the obesity-related health problems. Would you play those odds in Vegas?

Finally, there are the issues of emotional health and quality of life. Are there really jolly fat persons or is that just part of the Santa Claus myth? Most obese struggle with a host of issues from not being able to play with their kids, to job discrimination, social ostracism, frustration with narrow airplane seats and a million other daily battles. For most of us, WLS is the turning point in our lives where we finally take control of our weight, our health and our lives. Some of us do it with great ease and some have to work harder at it, but the majority are happy with their decision. It gives an incredible sense of empowerment. When asked about any regrets, the most common answer is they just wish they had done it sooner.

Whew! Didn't mean to write a novel, but felt it was important to try to clear some things up! All that said, if you are not prepared to have the surgery and make the life changes, then take a step back. It seems like you would benefit greatly from getting more information, particularly from more reliable sources than those that have filled your mind with misconceptions and misinformation. Cleveland Clinic, mayo Clinic, Johns Hopkins, ASMBS.org and other major medical groups are good sources of information and great places to start. Take some time to gather realistic information and process your thoughts and feelings about it. Discuss the risks of having surgery vs. not having surgeon in detail with your surgeon and your PCP. Talk with a therapist specializing in weight loss issues. Then make your decision. Wishing you all the best on your journey!

I just wanted to say that IMHO this is the best post I have ever read on this forum so far. Every person who is on the fence or anxious about WLS should read it. Kudos to you!

[DaddyMarie 291]

Awesome input everyone!! Thank you so much for being sweet and supportive!!!

[tmcbride 14]

I know this thread is pretty old, but in the case someone else is reading this and is looking for feed back, here is mine. I was sleeved on April 21, 2014. I had a good experience with my surgery. I have a desk job and was back to work in two weeks. I was sore for about a week, but like the lady said above, it felt like bruises. I didn't have any complications. My incisions healed really well. It has been some getting used to the new lifestyle, but it was well worth it. I am finding that I can tolerate things I didn't think I could from what i used to eat before. I just know what to say no to, what to only have a taste of. I shared a small peice of cake with my husband (about three bites) for my neices graduation. No problems. I didn't over do it. I can have fresh squeezed lemonade-with splenda. I have had a small peice of pizza-thin crust. Yes i moved into solids a little before some poeple, but i have been able to tolerate it. My body is different. Like was mentioned above too, I drink bigger sips of Water now too. It does get easier, and better. It's just those first 4-6 weeks vs the rest of your life. I was up walking 5-10 laps around the halls in the hospital the NIGHT of my surgery. I went walking after. It helped a lot. I haven't thrown up. I have had a few times my stomach hurt from a particular food. that just meant i wasn't ready for it yet. I would say that my surgery went very well and am happy I did it. It will change your relationship with food. It will make you take a look at why you eat some of the things you do. It will make you want to make healthier choices. You will get to a point where you won't have to worry about every single thing. It does get better. Hang in there everyone who is thinking about and are having reservations about VSG or any weight loss surgery. I would rather spend the short amount of time getting used to a new lifestyle, losing my excess weight, compared to the lifetime of obesity and the shortened lifespan. I wonder what I will do with all the extra years I am gaining back! Good luck everyone

[DaddyMarie 291]

Hello! I was sleeved May 7th and I feel awesome!!!!! I am down 28 lbs and I'm blazing my trail!

Reading my original post was a little bittersweet. Goodby old Steph hello new Steph!!