True Life Story

[Chellemetime 299]

My son's mouth and smile are exactly like his birth dad's. His fingers are just like his birth dad, based on the pictures I see. He had a gap between his front two teeth, just like his birth mom. I'm so grateful to have him, but his birth parents sure missed out on a beautiful child. I wonder if he will ever meet them and how he will feel about it. For his sake, I hope they receive him with love if it ever happens. Scares me what lies ahead f him sometimes.

Oh, GG!! That's something you should be a part of. If he does decide to meet them, I honestly think you should contact them first to see if they are open to it. The "brother" that I mentioned earlier in this post that is my biological father's son was actually adopted by him after he met his mom when she was pregnant with him. He contacted his biological father later in life (not my age of course , because he was raised knowing he was adopted) and his biological father turned him away and wanted nothing to do with him. It SO devastated him that he can't even talk about it without crying. We've actually cried together because I can feel his pain. So please, I'm just relating what I know about this and I'm no authority and aren't good at giving advise but I really think you should feel the waters for him before he meets anyone. Just my opinion.

[gamergirl 4,610]

Oh, GG!! That's something you should be a part of. If he does decide to meet them, I honestly think you should contact them first to see if they are open to it. The "brother" that I mentioned earlier in this post that is my biological father's son was actually adopted by him after he met his mom when she was pregnant with him. He contacted his biological father later in life (not my age of course , because he was raised knowing he was adopted) and his biological father turned him away and wanted nothing to do with him. It SO devastated him that he can't even talk about it without crying. We've actually cried together because I can feel his pain. So please, I'm just relating what I know about this and I'm no authority and aren't good at giving advise but I really think you should feel the waters for him before he meets anyone. Just my opinion.

I've told him they when he's 18, if he wants to meet them, and they want to as well, that I will be there with him to help with everything. I've told him they they may not want to, and intellectually he gets it, but I do t think any child is ever ready to be turned away--not any adult. That's the part I worry about. Well it will all unfold the way it should I suppose. He's only 13 now so we have a few more years before all of it happens

[Chellemetime 299]

What a bittersweet story with an amazing outcome. I'm so glad you're getting to know your dad and brother...I cannot imagine the shock you must have had, but it definitely seems to be working for the best.

It is bittersweet. I had to come to the understanding that I actually have no full blooded brothers or sisters. Which was really hard. And I loved my Dad that raised me with all my heart so that was like mourning him all over again. So that part is sad. But now I look forward to forming a new relationship with this person and his son that are still here on Earth.

[moonlitestarbrite 902]

i was reunited with my bio mom 11.5 years ago. its a life changing event. i have a bio dad and half sister on the other side of the country i have not met in person yet, but keep in touch with. i call it the intimate stranger effect. the person is a stranger... and yet you know him/her intimately. its pretty freaky. i am so sorry this was kept from you your whole life. i always knew i was adopted.

[Chellemetime 299]

i was reunited with my bio mom 11.5 years ago. its a life changing event. i have a bio dad and half sister on the other side of the country i have not met in person yet, but keep in touch with. i call it the intimate stranger effect. the person is a stranger... and yet you know him/her intimately. its pretty freaky. i am so sorry this was kept from you your whole life. i always knew i was adopted.

It feels good to know that someone can understand. And your right ! Right now they do seem like "intimate strangers". My "new brother" (that's what I called him for a while) is so helpful and nice but there are things that are hard for him too. It's a process that we 're trying to get through. To make it a little more clear, my bio dad's wife of 28 years died a couple if years ago and he is still grieving for her.

[moonlitestarbrite 902]

and there are so many thing that my bio mom and i share, it's freaky. i mean really mind blowing. too many to list. but in some ways, this is a trap. she assumes she knows me, cause in so many way, we are like twins. but really, it would be better if she spent time just asking me questions and listening to me. but she's not very good at that. so i try to do that for her. as much as i can. but she isnt very open. she spent too many years buttoned up tight about herself. but i try. the best thing you can do with your dad and brother is ask questions and listen closely to their answers. just spend time getting to know them and letting them know who you are.

[Chellemetime 299]

and there are so many thing that my bio mom and i share, it's freaky. i mean really mind blowing. too many to list. but in some ways, this is a trap. she assumes she knows me, cause in so many way, we are like twins. but really, it would be better if she spent time just asking me questions and listening to me. but she's not very good at that. so i try to do that for her. as much as i can. but she isnt very open. she spent too many years buttoned up tight about herself. but i try. the best thing you can do with your dad and brother is ask questions and listen closely to their answers. just spend time getting to know them and letting them know who you are.

Thank you. I really appreciate your insight.