3Rd Day Of Pre Op, Husband Wont Stop Crying, Am I Doing The Right Thing?

[hbeasley 19]

I thank GOD that I found this forum and app. I am having gastric sleeve surgery on 12/9 and although hard, it's my hubby's crying and begging that is making me miserable. It's so obvious I am an emotional eater (I've always said I eat my feelings) because I want a pizza or other foods only when I get depressed about him. I love him sooooooop much but I will do this!! Anyone have a similar story or advice?

[No game 14,437]

Why is he crying? And what is he begging you for??!

[hbeasley 19]

He's so against me doing this and says he's scared I will die on the table. He's the type of person that won't fly bc of fear. But I can't let HIS fear cause me to change my mind! I'm doing this to get healthy, right? He's really a great guy. Just sort of quirky.

[No game 14,437]

Ok I understand... Good for you stand strong in your decision. He will freak but know that once he sees you've made it through he will be fine.

As they say "this too shall pass"

I would also tell him that you are doing this to live.. I don't know about you but I felt everyday that it was only a matter of time before I died, and died young because of my weight.

I felt it every time I climbed the stairs...

Let him know you live him and you are doing this so you two can grow old together

[hbeasley 19]

Thank you! I have told him a lot how much I love him but I guess I need to be more honest about what has driven me to this decision. It is five years in the making and he knows that. And yes, when I am unable to tie my shoes with out being on a bed and in some weird position or when I am at the beach and can't get up and down easily, that drives me. But more than anything I DO want to live. I have diabetes, hypertension and etc. thx for the support! I already feel better and stronger mentally!

[is it just me 80]

This is a great choice to make........ And with ur other health problems this surgery is going to help u............ Sometimes people can't understand the surgery because they really don't understand what were carrying around everyday.................... Keep ur eyes on the prize........... Maybe have ur husband read some of the good stories on here

[hbeasley 19]

Good idea Is It Just Me! Thx!

[Tink22-sleeve 528]

yeah, show him a bunch of our before and after pics. thats motivating. also try writing down all the reasons why you want to have this surgery and give it to him (like a love letter). sounds like he needs lots of reassurance.

let him get involved as much as possible- let him help you by taking pre op pics and measurements. maybe he needs to feel like a part of this all. let him help you by gathering supplies. does he go to appointments with you?

maybe even let him read this thread you started. We'll help talk him thru this.

Best to you both!

[hbeasley 19]

Thanks so much Tink 22!!! I am loving the support from this forum! U guys are great!

[SandeeD 363]

Hbeasely Although I know in my heart of hearts my family doesn't want me to have the surgery, they still support me in my decision. I know how you feel not being able to move the way you want to. Stand strong in your decision, and your husband will surely come around especially when he begins to see the benefits of the surgery. Remember, the fear is in not knowing. Be sure to educate him as much as possible about the process.

[hbeasley 19]

Sandee, it means a lot to hear from someone going through the same thing and supporting me! You are right, I just need to include him more and educate him more.:-)

[SandeeD 363]

You're welcome:) I love this site too! Great support and info. for anything you need.

[_imgood_ 63]

Hbeasely my surgery is 12/5/13 and I don't even have anyone to stay with me in the hospital. However, I'm going and will work out recover alone after I'm sleeved! Good luck! Welcome!

[SandeeD 363]

Where do you live imgood?

[hbeasley 19]

Yes, where do u live? I wish I could come be there for you!!