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Telling Friends And Family...



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How did everyone tell there friends and family. Should I tell them all at once or individually. What kind of reactions should I expect.

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Everyone has to decide who they will tell and even if they will tell. Most folks are supportive but there most definitely are exceptions so if you decide to tell everyone, you might benefit from preparing yourself mentally for a negative reaction or two. Those negative reactions often come in the form of "I had this friend/relative/co-worker..." followed by some horror story. There are roughly 200,000 bariatric surgeries performed in the U.S. alone every year. If you or the person telling the story personally knew 2,000 folks who had a "bad experience" following bariatric surgery, that would be one percent of the surgery population for a single year. Bottom line - the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor of having a successful, life changing experience.

Personally, I told friends and family as the opportunities arose. I didn't go out of my way to make any kind of group announcement. But I also didn't hesitate to tell anyone that expressed an interest. My reasoning was that sooner or later folks were going to know anyway. Lose 100+ pounds and people will notice. I was fortunate that everyone was very supportive. But I was prepared for negative reactions had they occurred. I had done the research, knew exactly what I was getting into, and almost certainly had a great deal more knowledge of the risks and benefits of the surgery than anyone who might have felt compelled to try to persuade me otherwise.

You're gonna love the new you!!

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I only told those closest to me beforehand bacause i was so emotional about it. Now that my surgery is done, i'm happy to share with anyone. A friend of mine has decided to get gastric bypass after hearing about my positive experience. Feels great to support a friend thru rhis journey!

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I only told a few people husband, supervisor, oldest kid before surgery. I just did not want to hear negativity. When I returned to work everyone knew because my supervisor told some people and of course they told some people, Now at work I am the person serious people want to talk to about WLS. Three people have had the surgery because they see my results and my lifestyle. They tell me that I look happier and I look so cute in my clothes. I don't hide the fact that had WLS but it is a personal matter and I treat it as such.

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I work with the public. I don't want to share my personal information with total strangers, some of whom really give me the heebie-jeebies. I've had coworkers who were stalking victims and personally have had inappropriate and unwanted attentions. Sharing anything personal with strangers only puts you at further risk. Whether or not to share is a personal choice that only you can make. Negative comments and lack of support are discouraging and frustrating. People close to you can surprise you. People who really care about you will support and encourage you but some may have reservations at first. In the beginning my husband neither supported nor discouraged me - he wasn't negative but he was was afraid something terrible could happen. When his fears didn't materialize he became my biggest supporter. :-)

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I've been very open with a select few. I've shared my story with people close to me and have been candid when asked by some folks and if I felt they would benefit from hearing my story. I am pretty much an open person but I do like to keep certain things private. I was a lot more open with people until I had a few not so nice and negative comments from "friends" and then I decided it was a need to know basis. I don't regret my journey and I'm not ashamed. I just don't wanna open myself up to more hurtful opinions and comments anytime soon.

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I'm very open, friends and family knew beforehand and were 100% supportive (worried, but supportive). I initially had not planned to tell my patients (I'm a PA) however, quickly discovered that they noticed every darn pound and that I couldn't lie to them about it...would make me feel like a hypocrite so, when they mention it, I say yup, I'm losing, if they ask, I tell em the truth. I've had a few say they can't believe I needed to do that and I honestly tell them I've spent my entire life obese and this is what I needed to do to be healthy. I've yet to get a negative response to that.

You have to do what you are comfortable with...I'm comfortable being open. It works for me. (Except with grandparents...Lordy Lordy, they were tough)

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I told only the souls that needed to know. My MIL+FIL, husband and my ex-friend and her husband ... aaaand who ever in my husband's unit indirectly had to be told (Red Cross message). I've been keeping it that way ever since surgery. It's a personal choice that feels right with me. You have to do what feels right for you.

Edited by ArmyOfMe

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