I am soooooo frustrated!

oreo225 · March 12, 2007

Well, I went to the hospital today in Berlin Germany and I had to see another surgeon as the one I saw last time was away. Now, the first doctor told me that I would be a prime candidate for surgery so I should think about the surgery and let him know my decision. So, after a couple of weeks of thinking and lots of hours trawling the internet, I decided I would have the surgery. However, the surgeon I saw today thought that this surgery was not for me! He said that because I liked chocolate and sweet things, I wouldn't stick to the rules. Also, he said to only expect up to 40 lbs loss per year (I am 120lbs overweight). I told him I was frustrated that 2 surgeons from the same department could have such different opinions about the surgery. He conceded that was correct but it was up to me.

So, what do I do now. I thought I was so sure about the surgery and now he is telling me that the internet doesn't tell you about the patients who didn't do well and that up to 33% of their patients have the band removed after a year due to the lack of weight loss.

Did anyone else have this problem? Or, is it because I am in Europe and they think differently to health problems due to obesity?

I was so upset with this doctor today, I left his office in tears.

Is this surgery not as safe and successful as I have been lead to believe?

:help:

lianna · March 12, 2007

I think your doctor is way off. Your doctor does not seem very informed or up to date on his band knowledge. I think most of us here have lost MORE than 40 lbs the first year. And liking chocolate does not mean you wont stick to the rules..... I love chocolate, lol.

ReneBean · March 12, 2007

OK -

I am one of the "only 40 lbs" people - BUT - it is definitly due to the fact that I have not followed the rules, not dieted and not exercised enough during that year.

Since I have been "on plan" I have done pretty well. With this surgery, you definitly get out what you put in - or rather, you get off what you Don't put in.

If you like sweets - well, that's ok. You will have to exercise some self control - because the surgeon is correct... the Band will not stop or even slow you down from eating sweets or chips or anything else like that. The facts are - the crunchy and sweet are the easiest things to eat...

So, the question is this: Will YOU follow the rules more of the time than not? Or will you eat every sweet or salty thing that crosses your path?

I am not saying you have to be perfect - because I lost the magic 40 pounds doing about anthing I wanted to do... but can you be good MOST of the time? If you are willing to exercise - and show a little bit of self restraint - you will certainly lose more than I did in the first year.

Now, if you expect the band to do it all - then NO, this surgery is not for you. If you go into this knowing that you will still have to watch what you eat and you will still have to exercise... then go for it.

Good luck in your deliberations. **Oh - and some other questions to keep in mind. If you DON'T have the surgery, will you have lost even the 40 pounds after a year has passed? Will you keep it off if you do? Will you have to suffer the pangs of hunger to do it? I love my band - because even on days when I decide to FAST (protein shakes only) I don't get that gnawing starvation thing. Restriction is soooooo helpful when trying to reduce the quantity that you eat.

Good Luck!

MarySue33 · March 12, 2007

Rene makes some very good points. My mother is the one who seems to be most concerned about the fact that I am not losing my weight at RNY speed. It takes all I have not to ask her how much weight she has lost since October...AND...how much weight she has kept off from the last time she lost 30#. The answers to those questions are none and that she has gained back 50 of the 30 she lost the last time. But...I bite my tongue, smile, and tell her I am in this for the long haul and that it is not a race.

As much as I would love to be one of those hard-working folks whose pounds are melting away, I am very pleased with my weight loss to date. (I am not going to say one of those 'lucky' folks, because I believe that they are probably working a whole lot harder at this in the exercising department than I am. No luck about it, it is hard work that is making the difference.) I did not go into this thinking it was going to be another short-term quick fix. I am looking at it for the long haul. If my weight loss is slow and steady -- so be it. I have always been able to lose the weight. I got my band to keep it off.

I think your doctor's stats are a little off, though. I asked my surgeon, specifically, some of those same questions. You have to have the right motiviation for the band -- that part is true -- but I think 90% of us here like sweets -- that is part of how we got to this point in the first place. If you want to see stories of people who were not successful, just read the problems and 'life after lapband' posts. They are there. However, they are not the vast majority of folks here.

Sending a hug to you...sounds like you could use one today!

juliegeraci · March 12, 2007

I would make an appointment to go back to the other surgeon and let him know your experience. While weight loss is slow for some of us, I would take 45 lbs loss in 9 months more than a gain any day. And while you can have chocolate and sweets I think you will find your taste buds change after surgery. Good luck.

GayleTX · March 12, 2007

I have a band for almost a year. I, too, love sweets and chocolate - nevertheless, I have lost 120 lbs in 11 months. I go strictly by the rules, though.....protein first, no fried foods, no white carbs (rice, Pasta, potatoes, white bread), no sweets. I take in about 80 gr protein/day (about half of that is supplements), I limit myself to less than 50 net carbs/day. I always get at least 64 oz. liquids. I do moderate exercise (still too dang big to do as much as I need). If you de-tox your body from the bad carbs, the sugar cravings will go away. The suggestions in the posts above are good. I use fitday.com to track my intake......if it goes in my mouth, it goes on fitday. It is possible to lose, but the band doesn't do it by itself....it takes knowledge (and using your knowledge) to lose.

There are great sugar subsitutes and good low sugar products on the market......we don't have to feel like we can't have anything good!!!

bandina · March 13, 2007

I can understand your frustration. During my lap band journey there were many people, professional and personal who were very, very discouraging. I think some Dr. let their personal opinion interfere with their profession. A lot of people don’t like the idea of weight loss surgery or they simply don’t understand it. Ultimately, I knew it was my decision. Go with your gut feeling, you know in your heart of hearts if it is right for you. Besides who knows you best? I would research the statistical information to verify if what your Dr. said is true. We have to remember that with any surgery there is the risk of complications so of course there is the chance of problems, but I know for me my high blood pressure at 28, lack of energy, and overall fight with weight was worth the possible complications. Now I don’t have high blood pressure, my energy level has gone up, and yes I can still have chocolate. I love chocolate covered almond clusters, but now I eat two of them and am full and satisfied instead of half the jar.

Best of luck, and remember it you already know if this is for you. Just ask yourself.

Bandina

oreo225 · March 26, 2007

Just wanted to thank everyone for their replies and suggestions. I tried to make an appointment with the first surgeon but he is away on holidays for another couple of weeks. So, I am going to see a surgeon at a second hospital here in Berlin. I am even more convinced that this surgery is for me. I know that my eating habits have to change and I am fully prepared for that to happen! I need this extra tool to help me feel satisfied and not hungry all the time.

Another problem is that my 20yr old daughter is not supportive in this decision at all. She says that the lapband is something abnormal and I should try to lose my weight another way. I have tried to explain to her that I have lost and gained 100's of pounds over the last 30 years. She is quite within her weight goal and the most she has had to deal with is 20 lbs. I know that this just as hard as what I face but I still don't think she understands.

I am heading home for Easter and I have decided not to tell any of my family. I just don't want them to worry about me being so far away. Luckily, I do have a good friend in the UK who is very supportive as she has the same weight problems as I do. She is planning to visit when I have the surgery - hopefully in late April or May.

Sorry for the rambling but it is so nice to be able to talk about the LBS to someone!

5jacks · March 26, 2007

I had 120 pounds to lose also..... my surgery was January 18 of this year and the doctor told me today my total lost is 41 pounds. I have eaten Peanut M&M's, Little Debbie Nutty bars, brownies and cheesecake. I keep track of calories....if I want any of the above it's mine! Just eat smaller amounts and write down every bite of it! So far I love my band and I'm an emotional sweets eater! Good luck with your decision!