I Lived Through This Surgery, My Sister Didn't.

[LyndseyD 106]

Hi Everyone,

I wanted to jump on here and share with you all the last six months for our family. My name is Lyndsey. I am a 28 year old mother of two, and married to my prince charming. For me, weight has been a struggle my entire life. I remember vividly being told at just 5 years old by a doctor that I was "obese" and from that point forward my journey really began. I had a pretty normal life, but fought weigth my whole life. I met my wonderful husband at work after loosing 60 pounds all on my own. Needless to say, marriage and getting comfortable- well, and having two children gave me all of that, plus more back. Before the surgery I was 255 with a BMI of 41.9. I had my surgery (VSG) May 8th, 2013 and just over 6 months later I am weighing in at 159.5. Since surgery I have had it pretty easy. I healed well, but did get pancreatitis right after the surgery and had to be hospitalized again for a few days. They were never sure if it was related to the surgery or not. Since the surgery I have tried really hard to make healthy choices with food, but to be completely honest I am a mom, and occasionally we do still eat McDonalds! (gasp!) I do not count calories, carbs, or anything for that matter. My doctor never told me I needed to. I DO drink diet coke... (terrible, I know!) I live a normal life now. I go out with my family, friends, and I am not constantly on some fad diet that wont work. I eat what my family eats, but I do try to focus on eating the Protein first, and follow that with the veggies, then the yummy sides if there is room (which there almost never is!). My goal is to be somewhere in the 130's. I really dont care if its 139.9 but I want to be in the 130's. I hope to reach that goal by the one year anniversary of my surgery.

I would also like to tell you about my big sister, my only sibling. Sherrie was a 34 year old mother of three, and also married to her high school sweetheart. They have been married almost 17 years. Sherrie had her surgery April 24th (2 weeks before me) and there were complications following the surgery. We didn't see it as much at first, or I probably wouldn't have gone through with it myself. But as I healed and started getting back to normal, my sister got sicker and sicker. Her stomach had a stricture at the top. The surgon put in a stent to try to expand it. They stent bacame embedded into her stomach wall and they had to dig it out. After that, the middle of her stomach healed closed so tightly that she couldn't eat or drink anything and keep it down. She had eaten almost nothing for 6 months. She was in and out of the hospital, and the surgon made it very difficult for her to get anyone to help her. Finally when they found the problem we were able to schedule her with a new surgon to hopefully get the problem fixed. She was hospitalized twice in October for dehydration and malnutrition. The second time they put in a PIC line, and bagan IV nutrition (TPN). She was finally feeling better. They sent her home with the PIC line and instructions on how to give herself the IV nutrition and we were told to continue this until her appointment with the new surgon. She came home from the hospital Monday afternoon. Tuesday I talked to her, and she sounded better than she had in months. She was optimistic that we could get her better and even shared with me that before they started the IV nutrition she was scared she was going to die, but now she felt like she has a chance. Wednesday morning (October 30th, 2013) we got the call that broke our family. My beautiful big sister had died at home, alone in her bed. She had asked her husband to not sleep in their bed as she was scared he would pull out her PIC line, so he was in another room. He came into their room that morning to check on her and get ready for work and found her. It was just too late. She had been gone for several hours. We were in shock. We had just got a glimpse of hope with the IV nutrition, and in the blink of an eye, she was gone. I went to the funeral home to dress my big sister, do her hair, do her makeup, and spend some time with her before we had to say goodbye. We burried her the following Monday. A huge piece of my heart is missing now. I want to share her story too because there are so many who have all these wonderful stories, but she doesn't have a voice anymore to share hers. People need to know that you CAN die from this surgery. When I had the surgery I honestly felt like the only people that die from this were the "huge" ones... and thats just not true. My sister was my size. she wasn't some crazy 500 or 800 pound person. She was in a size 18 pants JUST like I was. She died. It can happen. It does happen. I did happen to us. I am not trying to scare anyone, but I want to be her voice too. Do you research, make sure this is the right choice for you and your family. We are left now with three children that now have no mother, and my amazing brother in law (who loved my sister more than I've ever seen anyone love someone) is widowed. His heart is broken, and so is ours. A vital part of our family is missing. Below is a picture of my big sister before the surgery. She was beautiful.

,

[Arts137 1,811]

Bless you and may you be given peace. Can you tell us the cause of death?

[LyndseyD 106]

We do not have her "cause of death" at this time. We live in a big city and it could be months before we know the exact cause.

[Irishflower79 183]

I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing her story! She is absolutely beautiful!

[BKLYNgal87 503]

Lyndsey,

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing your sister's story. You are absolutely right, her voice needs to be heard. I am so sorry for your family's loss.

[Fluffnomore 1,235]

I'm so sorry. How heartbreaking for you.

[Arts137 1,811]

Lyndsey,

Thank you for sharing. I am heartbroken for you and her family...

[Ms.AntiBand 2,984]

Omg.. so sorry!

Thank you for sharing everything. Both sides need to be told. Goodness.. my heart breaks for you.

[caroline2 89]

My sympathy goes out to you and her family. So tragic. She was a beautiful lady. God Bless.

[cushy 117]

I'm sorry for you and your family, your sister was beautiful and I know that she feels comfort in knowing how much you and your family loves her and your willingness to be there for her children. Bless you and your family.

[musiclover 61]

This is so sad and very sobering too. What a terrible reality for you and your sister's family.

Thinking of you x

[kathp 81]

I'm so sorry to hear that this happened to your family. Please try to Celebrate your own success, at least in a small way, despite this terrible tragedy.

[Carlotta1 401]

Oh what a journey you and the family has to go through for years to come. I know what losing a loved one is. I lost my husband and the grief was at times almost unbearable. My Heart goes out to you and your family. It will be a hard holiday season..I promise u , time eases a broken heart. I just want give u a big hug right ne. God bless u and the family.

[Numenow 32]

Wow! Leaves me almost speechless! My surgery is tomorrow and I am trusting God to take me through.

Blessings to U and your family!

[Cmt7831 186]

So sorry for your loss! So sad and thank you for sharing! We do all need to hear both sides. My prayers are with you and your sisters family.