Searching for birth parents post sleeve

[jdmama911 224]

So, I was adopted when I was only 3 days old. I have always been curious about my birth parents however. Until recently I never thought about actually trying to meet my birth mom because I was so conscious about my weight. But now....Im really thinking about seriously trying to find her. Has any post sleevers found long list family after weight loss?

My concern is whether this search would bring up some crazy feelings. I wouldn't want to set myself back emotionally because of possible rejection, anticipation, nerves etc.

Anyway, I thought I would throw this out and see if anyone has gone down this path, and the outcome.

[joatsaint 2,814]

I was adopted, but have never tried to find my birth mom. According to my adoptive dad, my birth father has been dead for a while. He didn't know the status of my birth mom. Turns out we've always lived in the same town since I was given up. She never knew where I went or didn't care.

[gamergirl 4,610]

My younger son is adopted. I believe both his parents live near us. Unfortunately I couldn't leave well enough alone and I found his birth father on Facebook(I knew his name). I found some pics of the two of them and saved them for my son in case he asks later what they looked like. I think some day he will want to know. I can only hope they registered in the adoption registry so that he can know they wanted him to find them. Of course now I feel guilty that if have pics that I haven't shared with my son who would KILL to see them, but he's 13 and I don't want him to want to contact them at this age, and be rejected. I really wish I'd never looked him up, but at least I have pics for my son for later.

I know I contributed nothing toward a solution for your question, but I don't know that many others who have adopted or are adopted so thanks for letting me share.

[atlchick 42]

I wish you the best of luck!

[luvzpitbullz 41]

Are you working with a therapist at all? If not, I might suggest talking to one to help work through your feelings. I don't know about this first hand but my sister is adopted and has tried searching for her birth parents. It does become quite the emotional roller coaster. And you have to be prepared for not finding them or them not being happy to be found. And even if you found them and it was a happy reunion, are you prepared to hear why they decided to place you for adoption? In the best case scenarios, you will probably still feel a little anger, resentment or rejection just because that's human nature. Only you know if you're strong enough to handle that without having food as a comfort. It can be scary and overwhelming at times. I wish you the best of luck and for the best possible outcome no matter what you choose.

[jdmama911 224]

Thanks all for the feedback! I appreciate hearing from all sides of the adoption process!

A therapist may be a good idea. I think I shouldn't rush this, and make sure Im good and ready for anything. I don't hold anger toward my birth mom. I was told about her circumstances when she got pregnant. Im just happy she gave me life!

Anyway, Im going to look into a therapist before I continue my search