Feeling Alone

[acampbell1318 58]

Hi everyone I am getting closer to scheduling my sleeve (should be sleeved in January). Next month is my last NUT group class and then I will have a one on one with her. I go tomorrow for my stress test and I have to redo my EDG cause I had a small ulcer and that is Nov. 5th. However tonight I am going to the surgery seminar that my doctor puts on and it is mandatory. I am going alone even though I wish my husband would join me. I feel like he is not very interested in this process at all cause he thinks I am going to fail again. He wants me to lose weight so bad but he doesn't even ask how my appointments go when I come home, all he does is harp on what I eat and how much. I am an emotional eater anyway and he is not making it easier for me...I feel like throwing my hands up in the air and giving up. But I know in the long run this will be the best thing for me and my type 1 diabetes, sleep apnea, hypertension, and no energy. I asked my sister if she would take me to my next EDG appt. since they put you to sleep and her response was I would rather take off to do nothing or to do something fun. My mom has turned to pills and half the time she can not even function, she took me last time and boy was that an experience. Sorry just feeling sorry for myself and venting.

[Italiancurves 117]

One thing I know for sure is that YOU have to want this. YOU HAVE TO DO THIS FOR YOU! Someone else nagging on you probably isn't going to be the best form of motivation. I would look deep inside and ask myself ....what are the reasons that I want to lose weight?

What are the benifits for me and my loved ones? What am I willing to do to make this happen? And how should I tell him to stop harping on me, that it's really melt helping things.

Make the commitment and don't look back. This is a big descision. But think of the alternative.... Staying stuck in that unhealthy body. Do what works. This surgery works, if you work it. Best wishes. And u are NOT ALONE. We're all here together!

[Taminski 20]

wow, I am so sorry that you are going through all of that. Support is an extremely valuable thing and I would not like to be feeling like I didn't have any at home. Just know that you can come here and get support whenever you need it! Someone is always here and available to help lift you up and answer questions. Do you have a friend or coworker that you could ask to take you to your appointment? Just remember you are doing this for your health and keep pushing forward. I have faith in you - you can do this!!!!

[Kristina Mccarthy-Martin 27]

Sorry to hear that your family is not being supportive. I am 3 weeks post op, my 2 week post op appointment was the first time my husband went with me. I thought he wasn't being supportive of my decision throughout the entire process. But come to find out, he was scared of what could happen to me. Luckily my mom was very supportive and came for my surgery and stayed for 10 days (she lives in IL, I live in AL).

Maybe you have a friend who can be your support system or someone you friend in a support group.

[tigermom12 34]

Wow...so sorry your family is being crappy! I truly am. You just have to remember you are doing this for YOU...and only YOU. It sounds like your family has their own drama or insecurities...including your husband. I would be so hurt if my husband did and said those things to me.

I'm very stubborn and it would be a cold day in you know where before I asked any of them to help me out. I would try to find somebody else to take you for your EGD. Heck...I would hire a driver if I had to. Just keep reminding yourself that it's all worth it. The rest of them can kiss your soon to be skinny behind! Good luck and big hugs!

[2Big2Skate 328]

I'm not Dr Phil or anything, but it seems like there may be a wall there that your husband put up for some reason. Could it be the cost, or worry how it'll affect HIM. He may also not be taking it seriously, thinking you'll back out.

From a guys perspective, try telling your husband you NEED him, that you need his strength and his steadiness, in this difficult time. That word is really a trigger for a lot of men and can melt some walls. It makes the cowboy get on the horse inside our goofy psyches. A woman in need is rarely said no to. You know your reasons for doing this are good and valid. I would really try and get him to come to a support group where there are post op patients mixed in. It may show him what youre committing too and how important his role will be.

Wishing you all the best!

[Cupcake 801]

I am sorry that you are struggling with your love ones but know this as well as take comfort in this you alone know why you are jumping through hoops to have this surgery do that you can have a better you. This decision must be your own not anyone else . I wish I could take you to your appointment , we are here for you, by the way I have to have attend a surgery informational meeting as well . Where are you having surgery perhaps we can be a support for each other since you and I will be having surgery around the same time . Good luck . Also perhaps if your husband can attend a support group meeting with you it might help .

[SeaLegs 38]

Sorry about the hub. I hope as he sees you going through this process, he'll see how positive and committed you are. Beware that there are emotional ups and downs in the preop period. So use this site.

A couple notes: be sure you are clear about the effects of WSL on Type 1 diabetes, while it tends to be curative for Type 2, I'm not seeing much info on Type 1, and it might be a little rocky in those first weeks. Second, I was perfectly happy to go to and from my endo by cab, but the hospital would not release me to a regular cab afterwards, I needed to find a person, which is difficult when your friends all work! You might want to check on that.

Hang in there!