Who did you tell?

[SandeeD 363]

I felt that it would be irresponsible not to tell those closest to me about this journey. Because I'm a very emotional person and would probably cry if I tried to express myself verbally. I wrote a heartfelt letter explaining what I'm doing and why and emailed it to those in my family that are closest to me (mom, brother, sister, sister-in-law and niece). In the letter I invited each of them to talk to me individually if they had any questions. Surprisingly, without judgment, they each gave me 1,000% of their support. Basically, they have all seen me suffer over the years, and have seen my health take an extreme decline specifically over the past 3 years to the point now where I can barely walk (osteoarthritis, nerve damage of the spinal cord, high blood pressure, asthma, high cholesterol, etc.), so they are relieved that I've decided to take charge and do something about it. So my question is, how did you all handle telling people?

[READY4CHANGE2013 88]

I told my mom, sisters, aunt and Pastor! I needed that prayer circle to be encamped around me!! GOOD LUCK!

[McButterpants 2,846]

I discussed it with my husband first - he's very supportive. Called my best friend and got her input, again, very supportive. Next was my parents - they were the hardest, they both cried, but are totally on board (after I explained the surgery to them). Then came my son - he was actually the easiest, which surprised me. Not planning on telling anyone else right now.

I'm glad your family was supportive - it's important to have positive people around you during this process.

Best of luck.

[joatsaint 2,814]

I told my best friend and my parents. There wasn't anyone else that needed to know.

[Tiny One 223]

I've always been a private person when it comes to my health matters. I don't like being judged & didn't want or need the added stresses & anxiety of them trying to talk me out of it or saying I didn't need it. I Told my very supportive husband , 3 very supportive friends & my HR rep. It's actually allowed this journey to be nothing but positive.

[SueJH 205]

I've pretty much told everyone in my life. I'm not ashamed of my decision at all and, like you, they have all seen me struggle over the years. I've had nothing to positive support from them all.

[LeanerLena5426 61]

I felt that it would be irresponsible not to tell those closest to me about this journey. Because I'm a very emotional person and would probably cry if I tried to express myself verbally. I wrote a heartfelt letter explaining what I'm doing and why and emailed it to those in my family that are closest to me (mom, brother, sister, sister-in-law and niece). In the letter I invited each of them to talk to me individually if they had any questions. Surprisingly, without judgment, they each gave me 1,000% of their support. Basically, they have all seen me suffer over the years, and have seen my health take an extreme decline specifically over the past 3 years to the point now where I can barely walk (osteoarthritis, nerve damage of the spinal cord, high blood pressure, asthma, high cholesterol, etc.), so they are relieved that I've decided to take charge and do something about it. So my question is, how did you all handle telling people?

I'm so glad that you got the support that you were hoping for, and needed. That's wonderful to hear!

For me, I wanted to take this journey in private. It's not that I felt those closest to me wouldn't be supportive, I just know that they haven't experienced struggling with their weight like I have. It's not something I like talking about (with naturally thin people, I guess--I love talking to people who understand my struggles and have been where I've been!). I wanted to write letters, like you did, to explain my thinking, and the emotional pain...but I guess I chickened out. So congrats to you for being brave! And I'm so glad you got the outcome that you deserve.

[SandeeD 363]

Thank you all for your openness (JoatSaint, loved your video! It's absolutely a very personal decision. I've always been an "open book" kind of person, so not telling my loved ones was not an option for me, but again, I was pleasantly surprised at how ok they were with it. I didn't tell my father because he is in another state and I don't see him often, AND, he worries too much. I'll tell him afterwards.

[Skalleywag 12]

I have told my husband who has been a huge supporter and my two teenage kids who are also very supportive and my 2 best friends one of which has had the lap band . They are supportive but also worry about me and they don't think I need to have the surgery ( they are both bigger than I am). I am on the fence about telling anyone else at this point. I may change my mind once I am approved for sure by the insurance co. I just don't want to have to explain myself for a personal decision to get healthy.

[makinithappen2013 35]

I told my husband who is very supportive in my decision to have the sleeve surgery. I was waiting to tell my family (parents, sister and BFF) until I got my approval for the surgery... Well my approval came in this week and I told my parents last night. It went better than I imagined ( my mom is a nervous nellie) and I am very happy that I told my parents. They were very supportive and now I just have to tell my sister and BFF and then I am done. Their support during this wonderful new journey in my life is all I need right now. I figured I will tell other people after the surgery or if they ask!

[SandeeD 363]

Thanks Makinhappen2013. Although I'm at the very beginning stages and haven't been approved yet by insurance, I know my close circle would probably have freaked out if I told them closer to when the actual surgery is going to take place. I'm letting them know now so they have a while for it to seep in, and they can be a part of the entire process. I feel like a weight (no pun intended) has been lifted from me and I can check that off of my to do list! lol

[makinithappen2013 35]

SandeeD good luck with everything! I too felt like a huge weight was lifted off of my chest when I told my family ( now I just have to get the weight off of the rest of my body . I can only hope these 5 weeks go by quick I am so excited to start my new life !

[SandeeD 363]

Makinithappen2013, I'm super excited FOR you!

[L-in-NJ 136]

I'm having surgery in December and I've been open about it with my friends, family and coworkers. The only people I haven't told yet are my two boys ages 13 & 12. That's not because I don't want them to know. I plan to tell them within 2 weeks of the date. My mother is having open heart surgery within the next couple of weeks and I don't want to overwhelm them. Other then that I have been open about it. I say to each his/her own. Everyone has to decide what's best for them.

[SandeeD 363]

L, I totally agree. I see you're in NJ, I'm in NJ too. What part of the state are you in if you don't mind me asking?