Emotional Roller Coaster

[Corridor72 518]

I have been so excited about getting my band. Right now, I am on a bit of an emotion roller coaster about it though. I started my liquid diet 10 days ago. My surgery date is Nov. 15th. Since I started my liquid diet, my immediate family has shared my plans to have lapband with some of our other family members, which is fine except...the resounding response is "Why? She's not THAT big." My mom keeps telling them that I'm doing it for health reasons, which is true. I have hypertension, Type 2 diabetes, and I'm on medication for palpitations. Anyway, some days I'm confident that this is the right thing to do. I have health issues that are only going to get worse if I don't manage to lose the weight. I have dieted many times over in the past and either didn't lose the weight OR lost it and gained it all back because I couldn't stick with it. That is why I feel the band can help me. My reason for giving up on all the diets I've tried in the past is that I have to deprive myself of foods I love and/or I end up feeling hungry all the time. At the same time, being only 12 days from surgery, I keep wondering...Am I really doing the right thing? Is this going to be another attempt at weight loss that makes me miserable? Only if this one makes me miserable, there's no going back. I won't be able to afford to "undo" it. This is a permanent decision for me. So then I ask myself...if I have the willpower to stick with a slimfast only diet for 10 days, WHY can't I stick with any other diet for as long as it takes? I lost 20 lbs during the 6 month period I had to wait for my insurance approval but I can tell you that I'm not sure I'd stick with the changes I've made for a lifetime because I was hungry all the time. Another reason I think the band can help-I will have to make the right choices but it can help by helping me avoid being hungry all the time. It's like, one day I'm very confident this IS the right decision and the next, I'm having doubts. Is this normal? Should I rethink my decision? Or do I just need to suck it up and try to put these thoughts out of my mind? Maybe it's the hunger talking...after all, I haven't eaten anything in 10 days.

[canthony11242004 13]

I'm in the same boat as you, going through the roller coaster too. I want to do this just worried about I guess it failing me too just like the diets did. I will be following and hope you make the decision that's right for you! Good luck!!

[MandaMom23 684]

What you're feeling is TOTALLY normal! I too had second thoughts. I remember the night before surgery laying awake, and asking my husband "WHAT THE HECK AM I DOING?!?!?"! This decision is really life changing, and as with anything life changing there's always going to be a whirlwind of emotions, along with 'what if's'.

For me, I just had to step back and remember what brought me to this point in the first place. I had to think about all the years of yo-yo dieting....yes, I could take weight off, but the second I fell off the wagon I always gained it all back. I also had to think of my well being. At 300lbs I couldn't walk up a flight of stairs without being winded, or I'd sit on the floor to play with my kids but couldn't get back up. I wasn't living the life I knew I wanted to live.

I can tell you that the band has changed my life. I'm 9 months out and have lost 120lbs. Yes, I still have a bad day every now and then, and in the past I would have given up and put the weight right back on. Now, I have my band as a reminder...not only there to remind me how to eat, but also to remind me of where I've been and where I never want to go back to again. I have no regrets.

At the end of the day, you need to do what's best for YOU! Don't let anyone else's reaction influence your decision. It's your life, and you deserve to live it to the fullest! Wishing you the best of luck!

[SandyM 1,956]

Mandamom is right. I would be surprised if everyone that went through this surgery didn't nave the same feelings. I lost like 14lbs on preop diet and almost talked myself into canceling surg and just doing preop diet til weight was gone. What a disaster that would have been. You got this.

And after you start losing don't be sabotaged by those who tell you you've lost enough or are starting to look sick. People mean well but you are their comfort zone too. A lot of people here are off their diabetes meds and bp meds due to their wt loss and living the lives they want and need to live. Whatever you decide has to be right for you.

I've list 50 lbs in 6 months and have no regrets.

[Bandista 7,466]

What you're feeling is TOTALLY normal! I too had second thoughts. I remember the night before surgery laying awake, and asking my husband "WHAT THE HECK AM I DOING?!?!?"! This decision is really life changing, and as with anything life changing there's always going to be a whirlwind of emotions, along with 'what if's'.

For me, I just had to step back and remember what brought me to this point in the first place. I had to think about all the years of yo-yo dieting....yes, I could take weight off, but the second I fell off the wagon I always gained it all back. I also had to think of my well being. At 300lbs I couldn't walk up a flight of stairs without being winded, or I'd sit on the floor to play with my kids but couldn't get back up. I wasn't living the life I knew I wanted to live.

I can tell you that the band has changed my life. I'm 9 months out and have lost 120lbs. Yes, I still have a bad day every now and then, and in the past I would have given up and put the weight right back on. Now, I have my band as a reminder...not only there to remind me how to eat, but also to remind me of where I've been and where I never want to go back to again. I have no regrets.

At the end of the day, you need to do what's best for YOU! Don't let anyone else's reaction influence your decision. It's your life, and you deserve to live it to the fullest! Wishing you the best of luck!

Great post, thanks! Country Sweet, I think one of the reasons I didn't tell many people as I didn't want that kind of well meaning input or to be told things like I carry my weight well, etc. I have done so much research and I know this is the right decision for me. Tomorrow I get my band. I know it's not going to be easy but it's going to be so much easier than this last few weeks of pre-op diet. All those years of Yo-yo-ing up and down and up again. I feel like I cannot lose the weight. I've tried every which way. I'm 52 and I know the only way I can lose and keep off the 80-some pounds is with the assistance of the band.

[SandyM 1,956]

Great post, thanks! Country Sweet, I think one of the reasons I didn't tell many people as I didn't want that kind of well meaning input or to be told things like I carry my weight well, etc. I have done so much research and I know this is the right decision for me. Tomorrow I get my band. I know it's not going to be easy but it's going to be so much easier than this last few weeks of pre-op diet. All those years of Yo-yo-ing up and down and up again. I feel like I cannot lose the weight. I've tried every which way. I'm 52 and I know the only way I can lose and keep off the 80-some pounds is with the assistance of the band.

GF I'm so excited for you!!!

[mrsto 2,925]

Great post, thanks! Country Sweet, I think one of the reasons I didn't tell many people as I didn't want that kind of well meaning input or to be told things like I carry my weight well, etc. I have done so much research and I know this is the right decision for me. Tomorrow I get my band. I know it's not going to be easy but it's going to be so much easier than this last few weeks of pre-op diet. All those years of Yo-yo-ing up and down and up again. I feel like I cannot lose the weight. I've tried every which way. I'm 52 and I know the only way I can lose and keep off the 80-some pounds is with the assistance of the band.

I'm excited for you, Bandista. You've been on here for awhile (as I was before surgery), and I know how excited you must be to finally have your day. Good luck tomorrow!

[mrsto 2,925]

So then I ask myself...if I have the willpower to stick with a slimfast only diet for 10 days, WHY can't I stick with any other diet for as long as it takes?

Countrysweet - most every single person who had WLS, was able to stick to a diet and lose lots of weight. The issue is ALWAYS......maintaining that loss. For me, I've lost and gained the same 90-100 pounds several times. And that is not to mention the smaller losses & gains in between. Now, being older, it was painfully clear that anything other than divine intervention, I needed this surgery to help me get my weight down to a healthy place. If any of us were able to stick to a diet long term, and/or maintain that loss lifelong, we wouldn't be here. But we can't.....and we've proven that over and over again. I've dropped 56 pounds since March, and I have absolutely no regrets. I would do this a millions time over!

Having WLS is a very personal choice. People in your life are going to say what they will, but at the end of the day, it's all about YOU, and what you want/need for YOUR life. I agree with the above posters, in that all of the feelings you are having are completely normal. It's a huge step, and not one to be taken lightly. I also had all the "what if's"; what if I go through all of this and either don't lose, or gain all the weight back? It's important to understand that the possibility is always there. The band is a tool for us to work with, not cure us. But I have to say, I was feeling pretty hopeless before this surgery, and now I'm elated.

Sending the best of luck to you

[m1aman 944]

Well ladies it wasn't an emotional roller coaster for me at all. I was relieved I was finally doing something for my weight I could stick with. I was thrilled!

[line-dancer 810]

I didnt worry either I had lots of support of course there was others who had horror stories to tell but it seemed they had other motive to stop me for being thinner. I am 75 lighter and love the fact that I can close my eyes and pick something out of my closet and know its fits perfectly and I look great. Pride is a wonderful feeling.

As for undoing the band you just have the Fluid taken out and you are back to eating out of control if that is really something you want but you wont believe me. As you get the 2-5 fills it takes to get to the zone you will be feeling and looking great and not feel deprived at all. I don NOT allow food in the house that I can not eat. the kids have to it at school or keep it hiden and if I fine it it get tossed and a hard talk from me which of course they hate. Take this time to set up your house and take charge of yourself...most of us had to learn to put ourselves first with no exceptions.....good luck and you will do great and be happy that you did this for yourself.

[Corridor72 518]

Thanks, everyone for all of the replies! It makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one who ever second-guessed their decision so close to the big day. I'm confident it's the right thing to do. I guess it's just because it is such a life changing thing.

[Melllima 8]

Do not hesitate at all, It is very normal to have this mood changes BUT keep in mind that we all had these doubts. But now so satisfied with the decision we made we would have it again if we had to decide .

[Lu_11 52]

That is normal. I remember laying in the bed waiting for them to take me into surgery. I almost yelled out " I've changed my mind". But I didn't and glad I did it.