Think I am leaving this board

[Boo Boo Kitty 3]

Wow, some of the things in these posts are very harsh. Again, I NEVER asked for a handout. I was looking for some nice people who are going through similar issues to talk with. Unfortunately it seems that because I asked financial advice about paying for surgery I was viewed as someone looking to take something. Honestly, I know you all think it's funny to post back and make snide comments...but truly I was looking for some outreach and help.

And frankly yes at times I do feel sorry for myself...we all do, it's human. I was down in the dumps when I came on here and hoping to find some kind of online community. Funny, you come back with these analyzing, rude comments and none of you know me at all or have made an attempt to get to know me. Pathetic as it might be though, it hurts. And I really hate that I was so looking for some kind of connection that I am sitting here feeling hurt. Stupid I know so please don't send any comments telling me so.

I wish everyone luck with their surgeries or their after-care. And for the 3 women who wrote such nice things...I will be emailing you off board.

Thanks

Dahlia

I think they were having a bad day and they made you an easy target, I am sorry for that. When someone comes to us for support it is our job as human beings to do it, but for some empathy just does not come at all. I am truly sorry that them trying to make you feel bad makes them feel better about themselves!

[Lap_dancer 8]

Best of luck to you Dahlia. I can only wish you a happy journey. You have no idea where many of us have been and are currently walking. I choose not to share it because I feel like it may only bring down the countenance of others. So carrying mine onward, may you find your bliss.

[HarleyNana 10]

Dahlia, you've only been a member since Feb 15, 2007, there are many like myself who have been a member for more than 2 years.

I'm not sure you really gave LBT a fair chance, but I never really understood people who announce they're leaving anyway, unless it's to be asked to stay.

I've been out of the loop for a couple of months, but that was my choice, nothing to do with LBT. There are lots and lots of personalities here, I have gained many true friends here that I keep up with on a daily basis, then there are others who come and go, I figure it's their loss as will be yours.

Take care.

[Elisabethsew 50]

I wish you all the best and respect your decision to leave.

[Kat817 19]

****off topic****

HI PAT!!!! Haven't seen you in ages---just had to say HI---miss you girl!!!

Kat

****return to topic****

[Ambrosia 1]

Slight Detour -

AngelaT - The Secret should be required viewing (or reading) for everyone! A co-worker lent me her DVD several months ago when I was going through a rough period. Completely transformed me. I think Oprah did a show on it but I didn't see it.

Detour over, carry on.

[anonemouse 1]

Dahlia, to be honest, I've never seen you post, to my knowledge. You've only been here for 11 days. That isn't enough time to meet many people, let alone decide if the entire board is supportive or unsupportive. There is a shit-load of people at this board who have gone through hell to get their bands, and they would be more than happy to give you support if you would ask for it instead of demanding it as your due. People don't react well to statements that come across as demands. There are always going to be people that have clashing personalities. That's part of life. At least the people here are going to tell you like it is, instead of saying, "Poor you, everything you are doing is perfectly right and everyone who says otherwise is attacking you." Support doesn't always mean agreeing with people, it is about helping you to learn what is appropriate and what isn't. You wouldn't consider a person that says to a drug addict, "You just keep doing everything you're doing and don't change a thing" as being supportive, would you?

Dahlia, if you stay, you will get support. But you will also get constructive criticism and tough love, if necessary.

[susannah 2]

Hi Angela, I have MS and have never heard of The Secret. What is it?

Susannah

[sleepyjean 0]

I never really understood people who announce they're leaving anyway, unless it's to be asked to stay.

There are lots and lots of personalities here, I have gained many true friends here that I keep up with on a daily basis, then there are others who come and go, I figure it's their loss as will be yours.

Amen, Nana!

I participate in a number of online communities besides LBT and it always makes me laugh when someone feels the need to exit with a dramatic "goodbye forever" post. First off, most of the people who read such a message have no idea who that person is or what she's talking about. Secondly, the person who left the message ALWAYS comes back to see how everyone reacted to their thinly veiled f-you message. Always.

Good, bad, or indifferent, everyone here has the right to speak their mind. If someone thinks Dahlia is throwing a pity party for herself, they have the right to say so. If Dahlia thinks everyone here is an uncaring biatch, she has the right to say so. As with any online community, we are all strangers to some degree and that makes it easy to misinterpret things that people say.

Bottom line is, this is supposed to be an enjoyable activity. If you're not having fun, leave. Lash out if you must, but it serves no useful purpose. There's a lot more to stress out about than comments from a total stranger on the internet.

[Dahlia 0]

No I have not been on here very long. But, if you are somewhere that all you get is flack and rude private emails, why would you not feel like leaving?

And the reason I announced I was leaving is plain and simple. I feel that when people are treated shabily they need to speak up and let those that have spoken rudely or what have you know about it. Also, I wanted to let others know what was going on. And in fact have gotten quite a few private emails saying others have gone through the same on this board and in fact hold back what they want to say on here because of the flamers. A few have said they stay for the info and not for the friendship because people on here can be mean.

Now, I am not saying all the people on here are like that - far from it...in fact I think most are probably nice. But, as they say a few really bad apples can spoil a whole bunch.

Thanks

[yukaputz 0]

I was a member of a motorcycle saftey forum. I found that the views and rulling expressed on that board by the moderator and supporting participants were ignorant and rude. I did not approve of the way the moderator handled situations. Instead of pointing fingers and making statements, I just quietly sent the request to delete my account and moved on with my life.

Again I ask, what is the point of this post?

Folks,

It's the internet. If you don't like it, turn it off.

[DonnaMarie 0]

Ok.. moderator?

Maybe time to close this thread.. kinda getting old..

Everyone have a great day!!

[Elisabethsew 50]

COMMUNICATION boards and the Internet and very much like communication in real life. Some people get along, some don't, some people are attention seekers, some are lurkers. The point is NO ONE is going to get along ALL the time with ALL the people. It doesn't happen in real life and it doesn't happen in cyberlife either.

Often, people who feel the need to post dramatic good-byes and publically group "the board" as uncaring and unsupportive have personal issues that they hope "the Board" will resolve. When the advice or opinions are at odds with the person WANTS to hear, the nasty posts begin.

I think it's silly to beg a person to stay when SHE/HE is the one who publically announce her/his DESIRE to leave. It's a free country. If you find another place that is supportive of you, by all means GO! To beg or encourage a person to stay only serves to feed the behavior and that's exactly what the person wants... attention.

Good luck and best wishes to you on the new board.

[TheCascadian 1]

Dahlia,

I'm sorry you did not find what you are looking for on here.

However, these sorts of accusatory goodbye posts are overly dramatic and don't usually bring about anything good. I don't even have to ask what "the point" of a thread like this is: it is to garner you some attention. It is emotionally manipulative of you, but also practically guarantees a negative response for you- very unhealthy.

I think you have some serious needs that are going unmet, so I would honestly suggest a counselor or psychologist to talk with as well as help in your band journey from whatever other board you found.

This is just my .02 cents, maybe we are all mean jerks on here... Anyway, good luck and I hope you find the help you need!

[Marimaru 7]

If you got nasty PM's in response to some of your posts, the best thing to do would be to alert a moderator. They can then decide if they think that the PM's to you were above what the rules allow.

If you still around, I think you will find a number of people that you can feel comfortable around, and then just ignore the rest. This board has lots of great information and you can get good answers to questions if you are having trouble, but sometimes someone says something not nice, or says something in a way that seems not nice, and an online forum is a good place to start to learn to ignore harsh comments and to try not to take things so personally. It can be fun to jump into the rants and raves section and throw a comment into the more controversial threads, and see what kind of response you get. It's only fun though, if you've decided you are doing it for fun, and it's not personal. I hope that makes sense.