what do I turn to now? Starting to feel low!

[tinker0614 0]

I thought long and hard before I was banned on Feb. 15th. I was tired of being this big and felt I knew what I was gettting into. I am not really hungry just a little bummed out on broth. think the biggest problem is that someone took my security way....I have turned to food for so many things. When I was happy, sad , depressed or just for the heck of it. Now that is gone. I know it sounds like I have a mental problem but I have this sad feeling that I can't get past. It has only been a week and I know I have a long way to go but I was looking for some encouragement on how others may handle those feeling when this was all new to them. again...I don't regret this just need to get use to it. I wonder if I will ever be able to eat and have enough to really enjoy it! there it is....I bear my inner thoughts....HELP

[babygrl1234 6]

I have been having the same problem. I think I need a hobby. I had a hobby-eating. I have just been trying to keep myself busy so I don't think about it.

[marys 2]

oh my gosh tinker - i would take a guess that 99-100% of us here feel the same way as you - food is our everything - I know it was to me. Yes, it is a bit hard but it gets easier. It's taken over 1 year for me to really start feeling and making changes - not so much what I needed to eat and when, etc. but stuff like, throwing food away - oh my god - I almost killed my boyfriend a few times when he would take my plate away when I said i was full -

or - being finished eating and watching others eat - kill me now!:omg:

or not binging when I am upset or finishing a box of Cookies - well, you get my drift!

You will find that band will help you but can't totally stop you - you can still derive pleasure from food and hopefully eat a wide range of foods (everyone is different here). You will also learn lots and lots of new ways to be and act around food. That's why the band is good - it helps you make changes. And it helped me realize why I was fat - it throws all your bad habits in your face and strongly suggests you make changes.

Properly restricted means you should be able to eat three good meals a day - you will have to watch your portions - although properly restricted means you won't be able to stuff yourself to the gills either - or you will hurt bad.

You will enjoy food again - and maybe more because it won't be ruling over you. And broth does get boring, ick - can you expand your diet (within docs orders - I could have popsicles, creamy but not too thick Soups, full strength juices, milk, hot cocoa, etc.? Also, ramen noodle broth is good)

hang in there sweetie, you can do this, really!

[tinker0614 0]

thank you so much for the words of encouragement. Just needed to let a few tears flow. I know it will get better just so impatient! There is strength in numbers and I am so glad to have found a place where I can voice what I truly feel with people that truly understand. It is good to know that I really am not in this alone. thanks again. sniff...I do feel better

[marys 2]

You are so welcome and glad you are feeling a little better! Just take it day by day on this new life journey. Mary

[waterlily1072 5]

That is my biggest struggle. I had a nervous breakdown and had to take 3 months off because of that very problem. My life was so busy and I had no time to stop and cope with the fact that my way of relieving stress was gone and to find a new one. I stopped coming to this board and I stopped losing weight, I didn't go for fills when I should have. All because I was so depressed that I couldn't eat the way I had always eaten for my entire life. All I can say is that we are all here for you, this is the best place to come because I'd wager to say that almost everyone here has felt the same way. I know I have good days and I have bad ones, but it does get easier. The thing that helps me the most is being here on this site. Just hang in there, once you get past the healing phase you wil be able to eat real food again and that will make a big difference.

[Keluliana 0]

Thanks for posting - I haven't been banded yet, but the worst week of my life to this point was just after I started taking anti-depressants, which left me no appetite for food. The endorphins hadn't started increasing yet, but I had no desire for the one joy/relief I had always known and been able to count on because of the side effect of the meds.

I think it's fine to do some genuine grieving over the lost ability to eat for comfort and indulge. But someday, it will be worth it, and it will get easier every week. The sense of loss will fade and the sense of joy and ease of living will get stronger. Hang in there and have a good cry when you need to.

[Paulax 8]

These posts are so wise, I have nothing to add. Just letting you know that you are not the only one.

One thing that I'd like to point out is that a general anesthesia can affect your moods, so that could be contributing to your feelings.

Congratulations on your banding and as a lovely poster once said to me....be careful with that band there, it can be life changing.

Positive things will come more clearly in the near future.

[Carlene 12]

It's normal to feel like your best friend has died. Truth is, if you are successful with the band, it will be because you can no longer eat like a starving, third-world refugee. No more bread. Get over it. No pizza, Pasta, cake or rice (for me, anyway). I can eat half an order of nachos. I can eat 4 small meatballs in sauce (no spaghetti, no salad, no breadsticks). I can eat tuna, but chicken gives me trouble sometimes. You can live quite nicely without meat - really, you can. There is lots of Protein in skim milk, low-fat cheese, and other foods.

Life without cheesecake is still better than life with 100 extra pounds to drag around.

[tinker0614 0]

This definitely brought a smile to my face today! I was so upset yesterday and today I am spending it trying to find some clear broth that will satisfy me. I guess one of the best pieces of advice you guys gave was "get over it" in a kind manner! I don't want the life I had before where food ruled me.....But I must say just that the smell of Italian food last night brougth my sense of smell to a new height! Isn't it ashame to love food so much? I feel like I am going through a breakup with my lover!LOL! I look so forward checking this site daily and knowing that I am not in it alone makes it all possible!

[derbygirl 0]

Tinker, in the beginning, I felt the way you do. I've been banded for a little over 4 months. You definitely do need to find new hobbies. Oddly enough, my new hobbies are related to food. I took up gourmet cooking and also started a scrapbook for family recipes. Perhaps it's a little dangerous to be so close to "the enemy," but I don't find myself being tempted that often.

I've always blamed my hunger on my brain, but now that I'm banded, I'm really not hungry unless I wait too long in between meals. It makes me feel better because all those years when I failed at dieting, I kept blaming my willpower. What a bunch of nonsense.

It's going to get sooooo much easier, Tink. You did not make a mistake. Yesterday I went clothes shopping for the first time since the surgery. I bought pants that were 4 sizes smaller. Mine were literally HANGING on me...I looked ridiculous. Sometimes I have so much energy I don't know what to do. In a few months, you're not even going to care about food because you're going to be wanting to get out and do things and meet people and live life the way you should have been living it all these years.

Best of luck to you! And congratulations on your band.

[annieM 2]

Great thread. I hope that I can get out of these doldrums too. I don't miss food. I overate a bit tonight, but it was only habbit. It was not enjoyable and i don't feel all that well now. What I do feel is empty. I can't wait for the surge of energy that people report when they have lost weight and I can't wait to change sizes. I'm in month 3 and haven't changed a size yet. I've become addicted to this site and playing "freecell". Not a whole lot getting done...

You guys hang in there, i'll try too

[edieparks 2]

Tinker,

I changed my food hobby to a exercise hobby. Today the weather was so nice!! I walked 3 miles in the sun with my pet. I used the time for just "me".

I also met my gym buddy and did another hour with her.

I just walked right up to her at the gym last summer and we have become close friends. We share our up and downs while we are helping our health.

Last June (06) I could only walk 15 minutes without worrying about injuring my bad knees.

Make your new hobby something that will help your band.

Start slowly and the energy will come.

edie:) :)

[juliegeraci 7]

You'll be fine once you get on solids. Right now you are healing. I remember I cried when I was banded. I knew I was giving up something. I still have problems with not being able to eat big portions and I get bummed out. I would say to you that you will be able to eat almost everything you enjoy just in smaller portions. Hang in there. It does get better.

[juliegeraci 7]

You are normal. I mourned the loss of my friend "food" right after the surgery. The good news is that you can still eat all your favorite foods just smaller portions. Good luck..