crmills74 11 Posted April 24, 2013 I'm scheduled for surgery on 6 May 2013. My husband is deployed to Afghanistan until October. He knows I was in process to get surgery but I haven't told him I have a date because I want it to be a surprise. Any Military wives out there having surgery while hubby is deployed? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cherry 71 Posted April 24, 2013 No, however, my husband is on a work assignment for 10 months. He left nearly 3 months ago just when I was at the beginning of all of this. I couldn't distract him from work with making life about "me" so there was minimal talk between he & I about my surgery. I was SHOCKED when my date was scheduled and I contemplated not telling him. I didn't tell him for a few weeks actually, but then I did tell him. He was very upset (did he think I wasn't going to go through with it?) And aside from what may have been his own reasons, I am POSITIVE that he was upset because he was scared for me and knew he could not be here when I had surgery. I am 1 wk post op. I skyped with him when I was in recovery but never even remembered. The next day we skyped, he was rude to me. I won't be able to see him for a bit, but am hoping to make a trip to see him when I am somewhat recovered. I hope he is surprised but to be honest, I really don't care - my surgery was about ME (sorry to sound a little rude). I don't think it would have been right to have surgery without his knowledge. As it was, I carry copies of legal docs on me in case I died or something happened, and although I would have been dead, I would never have been able to forgive myself for not telling him despite his non-support. I know this is not same as you, but Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crmills74 11 Posted April 24, 2013 No' date=' however, my husband is on a work assignment for 10 months. He left nearly 3 months ago just when I was at the beginning of all of this. I couldn't distract him from work with making life about "me" so there was minimal talk between he & I about my surgery. I was SHOCKED when my date was scheduled and I contemplated not telling him. I didn't tell him for a few weeks actually, but then I did tell him. He was very upset (did he think I wasn't going to go through with it?) And aside from what may have been his own reasons, I am POSITIVE that he was upset because he was scared for me and knew he could not be here when I had surgery. I am 1 wk post op. I skyped with him when I was in recovery but never even remembered. The next day we skyped, he was rude to me. I won't be able to see him for a bit, but am hoping to make a trip to see him when I am somewhat recovered. I hope he is surprised but to be honest, I really don't care - my surgery was about ME (sorry to sound a little rude). I don't think it would have been right to have surgery without his knowledge. As it was, I carry copies of legal docs on me in case I died or something happened, and although I would have been dead, I would never have been able to forgive myself for not telling him despite his non-support. I know this is not same as you, but[/quote'] Thanks so much for sharing! You don't sound rude at all, it is about you. Perhaps your hubby is concerned that once you lose a lot of weight, things may change between u all? Idk, sometimes I think my husband likes me overweight. He never once complained about my size and I am 80 lbs heavier than when we married. I am going to tell him that I have a date. It's just that everytime I talk about it, he acts as if its his first time hearing about it and he asks the same questions he's asked before. Then out of concern, he's gonna call his mom to have her come help me out and that's a no go! Anyway, thanks for putting things in perspective , especially the part about if something happened and you didn't tell him. I wish you the best! 1 Cherry reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
califmomto4 84 Posted April 24, 2013 I am not in the same situation as you but just wanted to say that I have gained about 90 lbs since hubby and I have been together and he never said a word about my weight. I don't think that he "likes" me fat....I think that he just lovea me despite that...lol. He probably never said anything because he didn't want to be hurtful...I'm sure he noticed my weight gain. Lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anm1063 24 Posted April 25, 2013 Hey! My husband is not currently deployed, but he leaves just a few short weeks after surgery, so he, like your hubbs, is going to come home to an all new wife! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crmills74 11 Posted April 25, 2013 Hey! My husband is not currently deployed' date=' but he leaves just a few short weeks after surgery, so he, like your hubbs, is going to come home to an all new wife![/quote'] I know. It's exciting! 1 anm1063 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
anai_nena 1 Posted April 25, 2013 Hi be very careful. Ensure that u have support n help bc the recovery can be quite tough... I couldn't have made it without my hubby... good luck... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dorian 683 Posted April 26, 2013 Hi be very careful. Ensure that u have support n help bc the recovery can be quite tough... I couldn't have made it without my hubby... good luck... Me either! My hubby was a Godsend this week! Better than I thought he could be! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites