Sparklette 381 Posted April 23, 2013 My parents are suddenly antiRNY. After a year of preparing for RNY they are now, with only two days to surgery all "Why don't you get the sleeve, less complications with the sleeve, are you sure you want to have surgery, You won't be able to eat that little, you're too young, huge lifestyle change, you won't be able to handle it, So and so had RNY and nearly died, So and so had the sleeve and they lost (blank) weight." And I'm like WHY NOW? OVER A YEAR AND NOW YOU'RE VOICING ALL OF THIS NOW! WTF??? I snapped tonight and I say "I'm doing this, it's my decision. If you were this concerned, why didn't you voice this a year ago when I started this whole thing and told you the options. This surgery is my choice and I've made my decision, and I'd like you to support that. End of story." Of course, we all have parents and know it wasn't the end of story. They are still trying to sway me, But I'm standing firm. Thank you for ready my little rant. 2 elli'smommy and Cherry reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SoccerMomma73 1,867 Posted April 23, 2013 They're just being parents, it's what they do....I would, in a non-rant moment, say something like 'I know you guys are worried, and I appreciate that, but I'm an adult and I've made my decision. I am nervous and scared and would appreciate you supporting me in this'. If that doesn't work then I'd use the 'if you don't have anything once to say then don't say anything at all' line Likely....they mean well....they're probably just scared . GOOD LUCK!!!! HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 221.6 1 elli'smommy reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sparklette 381 Posted April 23, 2013 I know, IT's just frustrating. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yasminsnewjourney 52 Posted April 23, 2013 I know' date=' IT's just frustrating.[/quote'] Remember only you know what's right for you at the end of the day it's your body Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yasminsnewjourney 52 Posted April 23, 2013 They're just being parents' date=' it's what they do....I would, in a non-rant moment, say something like 'I know you guys are worried, and I appreciate that, but I'm an adult and I've made my decision. I am nervous and scared and would appreciate you supporting me in this'. If that doesn't work then I'd use the 'if you don't have anything once to say then don't say anything at all' line Likely....they mean well....they're probably just scared . GOOD LUCK!!!! HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 221.6[/quote'] That is true Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marisela 104 Posted April 24, 2013 They are just scared and worried and it is normal, but I totally understand how you feel. My dad was super supportive the whole time, actually my whole family was, but a couple of weeks before surgery he started asking like, why don't you this or that diet? and I was like, I've tried them all... and I actually sat down that night and made a list of all the diets I'd been through, nuts, doctors, clinics, pills, gyms, classes, etc so the next time he would say something I would show it to him, but fortunately he did not, I guess my mom calmed him down and said they should just be supportive, so believe me, it is NORMAL! and you should be happy that they care so much. You will do great and they will happy for you the whole time! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
heather200202 73 Posted April 24, 2013 I actually dealt with the same thing. They kept after me all the way till they were told to leave so I could head back to surgery. I don't know what happened while I was in surgery but they were so much more accepting after then before and also defended me when people would make comments that I was taking the easy way out. Now, is a different story cause the jealousy but oh well. Keep your head high and you are doing this for you and your future. Good luck on the surgery and I pray all will turn out great for you!!!! HW: 331 SW: 11/26/12 319lbs CW: 229 04/23/13 GW: 157 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elli'smommy 160 Posted April 25, 2013 Sparklette, Best of luck today! Thinking of you!! Day 1!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Expat 27 Posted April 27, 2013 My parents are suddenly antiRNY. After a year of preparing for RNY they are now' date=' with only two days to surgery all "Why don't you get the sleeve, less complications with the sleeve, are you sure you want to have surgery, You won't be able to eat that little, you're too young, huge lifestyle change, you won't be able to handle it, So and so had RNY and nearly died, So and so had the sleeve and they lost (blank) weight." And I'm like WHY NOW? OVER A YEAR AND NOW YOU'RE VOICING ALL OF THIS NOW! WTF??? I snapped tonight and I say "I'm doing this, it's my decision. If you were this concerned, why didn't you voice this a year ago when I started this whole thing and told you the options. This surgery is my choice and I've made my decision, and I'd like you to support that. End of story." Of course, we all have parents and know it wasn't the end of story. They are still trying to sway me, But I'm standing firm. Thank you for ready my little rant.[/quote'] I certainly understand your fustrations, I put the Atlantic ocean between me and my mother 8 years ago. Our relationship is much better now. You are your own person, you need to do whats best for you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites