Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Annoyed and frustrated



Recommended Posts

My parents are suddenly antiRNY. After a year of preparing for RNY they are now, with only two days to surgery all "Why don't you get the sleeve, less complications with the sleeve, are you sure you want to have surgery, You won't be able to eat that little, you're too young, huge lifestyle change, you won't be able to handle it, So and so had RNY and nearly died, So and so had the sleeve and they lost (blank) weight."

And I'm like WHY NOW? OVER A YEAR AND NOW YOU'RE VOICING ALL OF THIS NOW! WTF???

I snapped tonight and I say "I'm doing this, it's my decision. If you were this concerned, why didn't you voice this a year ago when I started this whole thing and told you the options. This surgery is my choice and I've made my decision, and I'd like you to support that. End of story."

Of course, we all have parents and know it wasn't the end of story. They are still trying to sway me, But I'm standing firm.

Thank you for ready my little rant.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

They're just being parents, it's what they do....I would, in a non-rant moment, say something like 'I know you guys are worried, and I appreciate that, but I'm an adult and I've made my decision. I am nervous and scared and would appreciate you supporting me in this'. If that doesn't work then I'd use the 'if you don't have anything once to say then don't say anything at all' line :)

Likely....they mean well....they're probably just scared :). GOOD LUCK!!!!

HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 221.6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know, IT's just frustrating.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know' date=' IT's just frustrating.[/quote']

Remember only you know what's right for you at the end of the day it's your body

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

They're just being parents' date=' it's what they do....I would, in a non-rant moment, say something like 'I know you guys are worried, and I appreciate that, but I'm an adult and I've made my decision. I am nervous and scared and would appreciate you supporting me in this'. If that doesn't work then I'd use the 'if you don't have anything once to say then don't say anything at all' line :)

Likely....they mean well....they're probably just scared :). GOOD LUCK!!!!

HW 312, pre-op (lap-band) 294, pre-op (RNY) 255, surgery date 2/11/13, goal weight 154, current weight 221.6[/quote']

That is true

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

They are just scared and worried and it is normal, but I totally understand how you feel. My dad was super supportive the whole time, actually my whole family was, but a couple of weeks before surgery he started asking like, why don't you this or that diet? and I was like, I've tried them all... and I actually sat down that night and made a list of all the diets I'd been through, nuts, doctors, clinics, pills, gyms, classes, etc so the next time he would say something I would show it to him, but fortunately he did not, I guess my mom calmed him down and said they should just be supportive, so believe me, it is NORMAL! and you should be happy that they care so much. You will do great and they will happy for you the whole time! :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I actually dealt with the same thing. They kept after me all the way till they were told to leave so I could head back to surgery. I don't know what happened while I was in surgery but they were so much more accepting after then before and also defended me when people would make comments that I was taking the easy way out. Now, is a different story cause the jealousy but oh well. Keep your head high and you are doing this for you and your future. Good luck on the surgery and I pray all will turn out great for you!!!!

HW: 331 SW: 11/26/12 319lbs CW: 229 04/23/13 GW: 157

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sparklette,

Best of luck today! Thinking of you!! Day 1!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My parents are suddenly antiRNY. After a year of preparing for RNY they are now' date=' with only two days to surgery all "Why don't you get the sleeve, less complications with the sleeve, are you sure you want to have surgery, You won't be able to eat that little, you're too young, huge lifestyle change, you won't be able to handle it, So and so had RNY and nearly died, So and so had the sleeve and they lost (blank) weight."

And I'm like WHY NOW? OVER A YEAR AND NOW YOU'RE VOICING ALL OF THIS NOW! WTF???

I snapped tonight and I say "I'm doing this, it's my decision. If you were this concerned, why didn't you voice this a year ago when I started this whole thing and told you the options. This surgery is my choice and I've made my decision, and I'd like you to support that. End of story."

Of course, we all have parents and know it wasn't the end of story. They are still trying to sway me, But I'm standing firm.

Thank you for ready my little rant.[/quote']

I certainly understand your fustrations, I put the Atlantic ocean between me and my mother 8 years ago. Our relationship is much better now. You are your own person, you need to do whats best for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • rlcpd

      Two months out from hiatal hernia repair.  Surgeon said to expect a lot more flatulence...something about the 'air' no longer being able to 'burp' out so comes out the other end.  That is my experience but have no understanding of why that swallowed air cannot be 'burped'. ???
      · 1 reply
      1. BlondePatriotInCDA

        As I understand it since your stomach is smaller and not completely resting against your diaphragm anymore you no longer have the ability to "push" burps out as well. Plus, since its smaller and we don't digest slower the trapped air moves a lot quicker out of the stomach so its no longer available to burp out. Hence the other option for removal.

    • Lizette1122

      Anyone had the TORe procedure? How did it go? How much weight did you loose? 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LadyVeteran1

      Sleeve surgery is on April 14th.  I am counting the days!!  Can't wait!
      · 3 replies
      1. Brookie2shoes

        Me too girl!! Are you in the full liquid diet right now? It’s sooooo hard!

      2. LadyVeteran1

        Not yet. I was told I only have to do 24 hours of a liquid diet. But I have my pre-op tomorrow so I’m going to confirm if I need to do longer.

      3. buildabetteranna

        Your so close now! It's gonna be great :) Wishing you a speedy recovery and looking forward to seeing how it goes!

    • buildabetteranna

      Down 33 lbs and slightly stalled, but I'm gonna reevaluate and push through. I started back to work last week after 2 years of being disabled due to mental health as well as my weight. It's a great job and I'm just so happy to have this opportunity at a second chance at life. Hope everyone is having their best journey ❤️ Together, we got this!
      · 2 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        Great work Anna! Keep it up 😁

      2. buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

    • Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×