hlg117 1 Posted March 22, 2013 My surgery is right around the corner and I have never been so excited about anything in my life. This is going to open so many doors for me...let alone I have never truly known what it's like to be healthy...to feel healthy. I found out tonight that a friend of mine and my fiancé were discussing how they think its a horrible idea that I go on with the RNY. For the past 6 months I was being led to believe I had all of this support. In reality I don't. I'm hurt because this was done behind my back and I wasn't even there to defend my choice. Has anyone else gone through this? How did you deal with it? I feel like I want to give up the idea of surgery...but I've come so far and in my heart I know it's the right tool to help me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Butterflys123 12 Posted March 22, 2013 Don't Give up on you! It's your body your choice So many people are anti WLS I am sure that was really hurtful to think u had the support Often our nearest & dearest can be afraid that u might change Write down all the reason's why your choosing Health & Life If your feeling down look at it or come here for support Just remember YOUR CHOOSING LIFE 2 kraney and nienie reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Anniesmom12 181 Posted March 22, 2013 Dont let go of your chance to change your life forever for the best for you. I can tell you that I thought I had support from my closest friend ... until after I lost my first 50lbs, then she became distant and we lost our friendship. I found out later that she was afraid she was turning in to the "fat friend" that I had always been and she didnt like it, so she didnt want to support my weight loss efforts anylonger...thinking I would give up and gain the weight back. But I did this to be HEALTHY and LIVE ! If I had not had the surgery I can tell you that today I would be over 400lbs easy and more than likely on my way to my grave in a few short years! Hold on, we're here for you as much as we can be! You have to think long term and hold steadfast to the goal of being healthy for YOURSELF! 1 Butterflys123 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Krystal7k 243 Posted March 22, 2013 My surgery is right around the corner and I have never been so excited about anything in my life. This is going to open so many doors for me...let alone I have never truly known what it's like to be healthy...to feel healthy.I found out tonight that a friend of mine and my fiancé were discussing how they think its a horrible idea that I go on with the RNY. For the past 6 months I was being led to believe I had all of this support. In reality I don't. I'm hurt because this was done behind my back and I wasn't even there to defend my choice. Has anyone else gone through this? How did you deal with it? I feel like I want to give up the idea of surgery...but I've come so far and in my heart I know it's the right tool to help me. Yes it happen to me my husband wont sign my family member sheet for the surgeon he doesnt want me to do it but im not doing this for him im doing it for ME 1 worm2872 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
worm2872 635 Posted March 22, 2013 The only person this should ever be done for is you! I know you are aware of that but do not let them sway you if you think this is the right tool for you. I will tell you that my BF had a similar thing happen to her and her marriage did not survive it. But she is now a size 8, healthy and has a new man who seems to support her. You may want to talk this out with a counseler. I wish you the best of luck!!! 1 Krystal7k reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Krystal7k 243 Posted March 23, 2013 The only person this should ever be done for is you! I know you are aware of that but do not let them sway you if you think this is the right tool for you. I will tell you that my BF had a similar thing happen to her and her marriage did not survive it. But she is now a size 8' date=' healthy and has a new man who seems to support her. You may want to talk this out with a counseler. I wish you the best of luck!!![/quote'] I dont think my marrage will survive but oh well this is for me I thank he doesnt want me to do this because he wont have control over how I look Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lou Zhur 2 Posted March 23, 2013 I dont think my marrage will survive but oh well this is for me I thank he doesnt want me to do this because he wont have control over how I look You will be in control of everything and love it!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lisa B. 0 Posted March 23, 2013 Aww that is so sad. You really need your friends and family right now to be your cheerleaders not deadbeaters! You are making the right choice for yourself and those that cannot support your decision to have WLS surgery are probably insecure about themselves and will try to bring you down, People do not realize how hard it is to have the surgery and all that follows. This is not just an "easy fix". Your doctor would not be recommending surgery if you didn't truly need it. SO stay the course and hold your chin up high. Make new friends, go to a support group meeting. Just don't give up and let others bring you down. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Krystal7k 243 Posted March 23, 2013 Aww that is so sad. You really need your friends and family right now to be your cheerleaders not deadbeaters! You are making the right choice for yourself and those that cannot support your decision to have WLS surgery are probably insecure about themselves and will try to bring you down' date=' People do not realize how hard it is to have the surgery and all that follows. This is not just an "easy fix". Your doctor would not be recommending surgery if you didn't truly need it. SO stay the course and hold your chin up high. Make new friends, go to a support group meeting. Just don't give up and let others bring you down. [/quote'] He thanks im trying the easy way out if I could do it by diet and exersize I would already be skinny I would lose weight then gain it all back plus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Butterflys123 12 Posted March 23, 2013 He thanks im trying the easy way out if I could do it by diet and exersize I would already be skinny I would lose weight then gain it all back plus When someone loses weight,gets a better education,has more money,moves to a better area,drives a flasher car...It's called Status and suddenly you are perceived as being more Successful ! There are plenty of people who don't want u to do better or to improve your self. When someone is moving up in there life, your Status ranking has changed. This can challenge so called family and friends because it means they will have to make more effort either with there weight or there behaviour toward 's you. As you will be perceived as having more options. Beautiful slim people are perceived as having preferential treatment. So many people think WLS is a magic and easy way to weight loss. It isn't U still have to work at it !!! The only way u can gain weight after WLS is by not sticking to the rules I am 5years out i have gained 14kg in less than a year my personal life has been a mess so i am sorting that out plus working on getting rid of the weight gain Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shawneey41 17 Posted March 23, 2013 Do not let anyone talk you out of doing the surgery. This is something for YOU!!! You cannot truly give love to someone else until you are able to love yourself. It is not selfish of you to put yourself 1st. You can do it and your friends and family will come around. 1 Krystal7k reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites