New, humbled, and embarrassed....

Cookie · February 13, 2007

This is hard to write, but I think it might be just what I need to get it out.

I was banded two and a half years ago. I lost 50 lbs, then stalled. I slowly let at least 25 lbs come back on. :cry I haven't had a fill in a year and a half. The last time I saw my surgeon's assistant who does the fills she proclaimed that it was obvious that I'd found my sweet spot and was doing well. I have 3cc's I believe in my 4cc band.

I'm an emotional/boredom eater, and we all know that if you want to eat around the band, you will...and I have. chocolate goes right through! So does ice cream, Pringles chips, soft cheese, and for some reason...cookies. I know that I still have a band there, because I can't eat cake, can't eat scrambled eggs, or anything resembling fresh bread. I get 'stuck' occasionally, but I don't have as much restriction as I used to have. I'm able to eat way more food than I should. Frankly, I think I gave up. It kills me to say that, but it's reality.

In 2.5 years I think I've vomited maybe 4 times. I NEVER PB, until about a month ago at a restaurant and I didn't chew a piece of chicken well enough and up it came. It was a strange feeling, 'cause I never, ever PB or throw up.

Two days ago I was eating a few tortilla chips and salsa. (Don't ask...!) and after two chips I got a heavy weight sensation right between my breasts. WAY heavy. Every five minutes or so it hurt, like something wasn't going down the way it should. Ever since then, for at least an hour after I eat I feel that weight, and I feel discomfort while food is 'digesting' but the discomfort is high up, under the breastbone. I don't have any acid reflux, never have! I have no heartburn. All I've eaten in the last 48 hours since this incident was potato Soup, a bit of lean turkey, and some soft cheese with lunch. I haven't had anything really solid, and the turkey I chewed to death! But after that small lunch today at work of turkey and cheese, I had the pain every 5-10 minutes for about an hour, hour and a half. Now I'm scared. I bought yogurt and a few cans of Soup to eat for a few days, I'm hoping that I just irritated something...but considering how bad I've been the last year or so, I wonder if I've done something else?

The worst part of this is that I'm embarrassed to call my surgeon's office. I was doing so well, walked out a superstar, and then I'll walk in almost as heavy as I was with possible problems. :cry My surgeon moved their office and now it's about 40 miles from me, and I would have to take an entire day off work to go, and that could be tricky to accomplish right now. Plus, my 'warranty' expired so all fills/appointments I have to pay for and I have to take that into consideration as well.

Any thoughts? I know for a fact that I've stretched my pouch, I can eat way more than I should be able to...but I still can't eat the things that I'm not supposed to eat, like breads, cakes, eggs, etc. One bite of hubby's waffle over the weekend caused bad stuckage, so I know that band is there!! I just can't figure out what this pain could be. I'm not experiencing the usual slippage symptoms, but what about erosion? Would I know that was happening? Any thoughts would be appreciated. I want to get back on track, but I simply don't know if I can considering what I might have done. Thanks anyone!

Cookie

warmmorningsun · February 13, 2007

Cookie, first I'm sorry you're going through this! Banding definitely isn't the cure-all, and I think we've all been through times where we fell off the bandwagon. It seems to me like your health in this case should be your primary concern. If you're able to keep it down without problems, try the yogurt and Soup for the rest of the week and see if that 'cures' things. If by Friday you're still hurting, having same symptoms, make an appt with your doctor. Tell them over the phone that you are concerned about the financial implications and see if they have a way to work that out with insurance (they may be able to do an upper GI or something under the basis of trying to find out what is causing your symptoms). Is the issue getting off of work because you have to make up the work? You could go in on a weekend day. Or is it another issue?

Cookie · February 13, 2007

Thanks Aimee...The issue with work is that I just started a new position with the same company I've been with for awhile. I'm still the 'new girl' and I'm still trying to find my footing. Obviously, my health is #1, but I'm also using that as an excuse 'cause I don't want to walk into that office and listen to 'her' when she sees how much I gained. :nervous (Her being the assistant I would normally see).

Insurance took care of the banding, but our insurance has changed and the new insurance won't cover the band, and it's also a pre-existing, so I'm sure I'm on my own with this. Again, I could come up with the funds, it's more an issue of denial and 'afraid what I'm going to hear'. If denial wasn't part of my vocabulary I never would have allowed myself to gain weight in the first place I'm thinking!!

I have no problems getting things down. In fact, while I was eating lunch today I thought everything was all better...then about five minutes after eating the weight/discomfort started. It was obvious that what I had eaten was making its way from 'pouch' to 'stomach' and was causing me some pain along the way. Hubby asked me to describe it, and I asked him if he'd ever swallowed a sharp tortilla chip or Dorito without fully chewing it? That 'ouch' feeling as it goes down? That's sort of what it feels like as it's moving from point A to point B, but it's not all at once...it's like a little goes down (ouch) and then five or ten minutes later more goes down (ouch). Like it's too big to go through and hurts, but it's chewed to nothing! :phanvan

Right now I'm thinking about going in and making some Soup since hubby is out of town for a week, but I'm nervous to eat! I'm going to do the yogurt/soup thing and hope for the best, I was just hoping that my symptoms might be a light bulb reaction from someone else too! Thanks again!

Cookie

warmmorningsun · February 13, 2007

Cookie, I hope maybe someone here has that lightbulb! The feeling you're describing is what it feels like when I eat too fast or don't chew something properly...

I wanted to bump this in case someone else out there has that lightbulb...

Cookie · February 14, 2007

Cookie, I hope maybe someone here has that lightbulb! The feeling you're describing is what it feels like when I eat too fast or don't chew something properly...
I wanted to bump this in case someone else out there has that lightbulb...

Aimee, you're right...it's exactly that feeling, except that when I don't chew something properly it has one major PAIN until the @#$%^ goes down, and then I'm OK. This seems to go on for about the time I would think it takes to move the food from my pouch to intestine, or wherever the heck it goes!:rolleyes

I did email the Coordinator/Filler at my clinic and detail my symptoms, and asked her advice. I haven't heard back yet, but hopefully tomorrow. I told her that I know it's been a year and a half since I've been in and that I had gained weight (no excuses) but told her that I would have to take minimum a half day off work to come in, so I wanted to see if she could pinpoint what I'm feeling a bit more and let me know if I should schedule an appointment and make the trip. I know I should probably anyway, but I'm a flat out coward. She's always been a little um....intimidating. I'm not looking forward to that.

It was the same today at lunch, and on a very minor scale, Breakfast...which surprised me since it was cream yogurt with no chunkage. How in the world did that feel wonky as it was processing???

I'll see what I hear from her if she emails me back, and go from there, unless someone has that lightbulb over their head! Thanks again Aimee!

Cookie

Kat817 · February 14, 2007

My DH has esophageal spasms, and prior to medication, he said they were painful--and described it similarly. He also would choke easily---I have had to heimlich him twice---scared the hell outta me!

I also wondered about your gall bladder---do you still have it? It may be a probelm...

Wish I had amswers for you---I will be hoping you can see the Dr. soon!

Kat

Poodles · February 14, 2007

Go to the doctor... living in pain is no way to be. If they say anything, then find another doctor. They should not judge you, but you do need their advice if you are hurting.

I did the same thing for 5 months thinking I was doing something wrong, but my doctor did not say a thing... and they fixed my problem.

tonya bell · February 14, 2007

Cookie, What do you mean by PB?

warmmorningsun · February 14, 2007

bump bump...anyone have these symptoms?

juliegeraci · February 14, 2007

Don't be afraid to go into your surgeon's office. I would make an appointment and be brutally honest with him. YOu definitely need to get a fill if you are overeating or are frequently hungry. You can do this. Just recommit yourself.

Platinum · February 14, 2007

Cookie,

I would seek medical attention. The doctor's office has seen many people struggle with the band. This band is not a cure all so don't feel bad that you have gained some weight back. Let them check your band out and give you a clean bill of health. It may not be the band at all. I would stay with Clear liquids until your doctor appointment.

My doctor said that if something gets stuck, stop eating and wait until your next meal to eat again. However, I would go to the doctor if I were you. Who cares if they give you a hard time about the weight gain? We all make mistakes. Please get there and let them help resolve your problem. That way you can get back on track!

Cookie · February 15, 2007

Thanks everyone...Tonya, a PB is considered a 'productive burp' by the Band Clan. Not quite a throw-up, but close. :phanvan

I have an appointment on Tuesday afternoon for a barium swallow to see if there is anything swelling/obstructing/slipping/eroding in or around my band. It happened again this morning after my yogurt (still freaks me out...) and after my light lunch. Not as much pain this afternoon, but still very noticeable and for approximately one hour.

The lady that booked my appointment was very helpful. I told her I had no insurance coverage any longer, she said that the Barium Swallow/Xray was $200, but that included a fill if my band is OK and I want to get some restriction again. The fills are normally $150 on their own, so I'm thinking that's do-able! I did ask what would happen if I'd slipped my band, was it fixable? She said "Oh sure, simple revision surgery, they just go in and pull your stomach down a bit through the band so you have a brand new small pouch and start over with liquids, then mushies, etc". I asked about cost, saying that my original $17,000 surgery was covered by my old insurance, all but $1000 of it. She said that 'piece of equipment' that I have in my body has a lifetime guarantee, and if I have to revise a slippage then I'll be probably be responsible for the $900 anesthesiologist fee, and that's it. That makes me feel a little better!

What makes me feel so nervous is that the pain/discomfort is for about an hour after I eat, but the 'heaviness' in my chest lasts for hours. I finished eating my lunch at 11:30 this morning and it's now 4:41pm. About 10 minutes ago I felt a 'twinge' like something was going through again. :phanvan

I'm also a 4 cigarette a day smoker, and naturally the heaviness in my chest worries me. I smoked a half pack a day from age 19 to 35, then at 35 I actually went to 3-4 per day maximum..and I'm 44. I know that at 3-4 per day I could quit, but I honestly don't want to. Talk about honesty!! :nervous I smoke 1-2 on the way to work and 1-2 on the way home. That's it. Sometimes if I'm at the casino by myself I can smoke a bit more, or if I'm with friends at a bar I'll do a few more, but that's rare. Most of the time it's only a few per day. I guess I'm worried that part of that heaviness/discomfort isn't the band, but a cigarette issue wouldn't cause food to hurt going through a piece of plastic...would it? :rolleyes

I'm eating soft stuff until Tuesday, and I'll know more after the ucky barium thing. I haven't had an Upper GI since high school, so this should be interesting!

Cookie

warmmorningsun · February 15, 2007

Cookie, I'm sorry I didn't have anything further to offer, but glad others weighed in; but mostly glad you broke down and made that appointment and got some answers :mad: Please let us know the outcome. Best wishes *hugs*