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I am an A type personality. A former athlete and self proclaimed workaholic (okay maybe more than self proclaimed...as I am told regularly that I work too much).

I spent a lifetime playing baseball, softball, rugby, indoor soccer and pretty much anything I could sacrifice my body to in the name of winning competitions. My knees started to go as a teenager (first surgery at 14). Now at 43 I have osteoarthritis and I am nearly bone on bone in my right knee. The pain in my knees have progressively started getting worse as one, I quit playing sports about 5 years ago and two...and extra 110+ lbs will do you in too! Its an awful pain.

I have paid the trainer and worked out diligently for 2 years with a 258 going down to 213 lbs. During this time I dislocated my right knee a few times (once while walking in the pool!!) and this of course makes for a great setback. Oh...I worked out with a leg brace on but not getting a 1000 calorie per hour burn does not help my A type personality when I only burn 400 in an hour. And lord forbid I only get to burn 250 because my knee has gone out again. *sigh*

How did I get overweight? I weighed 160 lbs in 1995 and gave birth in 1996 at 290 lbs! I weighed 330 lbs when I gave birth to my second child in 1998. Gestational Diabetes. I did not have diabetes nor did I carry over diabetes into my life after pregnancy. But I did get down to about 208 and hovered there. As I played more sports (now with another 50 lbs in tow) my arthritis got worse and the weight began to rise. Second, I developed a sugar addiction. I work and dont eat...I come home and I crash/binge eat. This is the mental game I have to change going forward. Eventually I quit playing sports (2008) and easily added 20 more pounds. Here I have remained.

Not one person, no matter what your backstory, goes into WLS flippantly. If I could control the sugar and workout without ending up in a knee brace every few months I would have done it! There is a mindset that needs to be achieved and I know I have a joint replacement surgery coming 10 years down the road. So while I have a plan that is 10 years long, I have short term miles stones to achieve right now.

I read about people's outcomes and successes after WLS. I realistically understand that my arthritis will still be here and still be painful even after the weight is off. I hope the weight loss eases my knee pain. I know I will be able to relearn the food because I am/will take the time I need (something I never do) and I am committed to each step of this life long change. I am a very assertive person and will take each step as it comes and not worry about all the steps that will come in the future. I just want to focus on what I need to do today and change that. Tomorrow I will focus on the next step and so forth.

Oh--I have a killer support group. My family and friends are going to be very helpful and my employees and my bosses are supportive. I am blessed to have these people in my life. For the first time, maybe ever, I am asking for help and I am going to openly receive it. That has been a huge step for me in the past few months. I tend to do everything for myself an not ask for help. Things are changing :)

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