vbgirl264 28 Posted January 20, 2013 I'm about to have gastric bypass on Tuesday ( January 22) and I'm wondering how everyone's relationships with there husbands/wife's or significant others changed after surgery or if it stayed the same. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Panda 354 Posted January 20, 2013 My significant other moved out two weeks ago. I am now officially a statistic...despite my broken heart I still have no regrets. I'm lost and confused but at least now I'm 115 lbs lighter and I get endless date offers. Can't speak for everyone else but my situation got increasingly worse with every pound that I lost. People get used to you being morbidly obese and sometimes they don't know how to deal with you when you are no longer unhappy with yourself Sent from my Nexus S 4G using RNYTalk 2 cookier224 and Cheryl Barfoot reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
abbybeep 53 Posted January 20, 2013 My relationships with my (now) fiancé and my parents has strengthened so much since my surgery. I feel like part of it is how you treat them. I haven't pushed my new lifestyle on them or ridiculed their food choices. They make their own decisions and I make mine, just like before surgery. Good luck to you! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jaymi2521 13 Posted January 20, 2013 My significant other moved out two weeks ago. I am now officially a statistic...despite my broken heart I still have no regrets. I'm lost and confused but at least now I'm 115 lbs lighter and I get endless date offers. Can't speak for everyone else but my situation got increasingly worse with every pound that I lost. People get used to you being morbidly obese and sometimes they don't know how to deal with you when you are no longer unhappy with yourself Sent from my Nexus S 4G using RNYTalk That's sad. Maybe he had his own insecurities Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
music1618 879 Posted January 20, 2013 My marriage has gotten stronger. My husband went on a health kick about 1.5 years ago and my new life style has fit in nicely. He has always been skinny, and I always felt out of place with my added weight. Now I feel like he can be proud of me. I don't feel like the fat girl with the handsome husband. Our sex life is like we are first dating again, and our communication is so much better, but it is because we have worked at it. Before the surgery we had long conversations about how this will change our lives. I always felt that when I would started losing weight he would buy sweets. He would then say just have the will power to resist. Since he has been skinny all his life it is not a concept he has really had to deal with. However I never spoke up before and before the surgery we talked about it. About three weeks in he brought home a chocolate cream pie and said it was for me. Instead of keeping my feelings in we talked about it. He said he wanted sweets and our compromise were things I hated like coconut. So it takes work and communication. Realize it is a change for both of you and be open to talk about fears and concerns. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kiwiladydee 402 Posted January 20, 2013 It was so bad in the beginning, but its gotten so much better. I think we expect people to change because we decided to make the change. sometimes that isn't fair to our significant others. Sent from my iPhone using RNYTalk Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shaunda 122 Posted January 20, 2013 I'm about to have gastric bypass on Tuesday ( January 22) and I'm wondering how everyone's relationships with there husbands/wife's or significant others changed after surgery or if it stayed the same. My relationship has changed. My husband is a big eater and that was one thing we did together. Now I am dedicated to losing this weight and he is supportive. He just keep saying I hope you don't get skinny and leave me. I think he enjoys the sex more because its a lot easier and we can do things I couldn't do before. I had surg Dec 5 and have lost 47 pounds. Hope this isn't to much info...lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mia_c67 11 Posted January 20, 2013 I am a little biased on this my previous serious relationship got extremly jealous to the point where he said ”stop losing weight your gonna cheat on me” but he ended up being the cheater!! But now ive meet a guy who is super supportive and understanding were not together yet but it can work!! Regardless always do makes you happy and if someone truly loves and cares they will stick around through thick and thin (literally) Lol best of luck to u!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
michelecaples 224 Posted January 20, 2013 I am hoping once I lose a little more that I will regain confidence in the bedroom thus making our relationship stronger than ever Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
worm2872 635 Posted January 20, 2013 Panda, I'm so sorry! But you seem to be a strong and beautiful woman. You'll get thru this. About eight years ago I got down to about 170 pounds. My hubby thought I wanted a new man so started cheating on line. Of course he never mentioned his insecurities to me so I thought all was well. Nothing physical but mental maybe just as bad if not worse. We got thru it so I knew this was going to be a huge challenge. We talk constantly about it. He does it again, he's gone. Even after almost 20 years. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MalyssaSue 65 Posted January 20, 2013 I'm basically stuck in my relationship. He's been supportive to a point but everytime I go to the gym he thinks I'm out screwing around on him. It gets old really fast. The gym is the only thing I have to do on my own. I'm basically raising our daughter on my own so I don't get out at all. I just want to be happy and someday I will be even if I have to be by myself. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Panda 354 Posted January 20, 2013 Panda' date=' I'm so sorry! But you seem to be a strong and beautiful woman. You'll get thru this. About eight years ago I got down to about 170 pounds. My hubby thought I wanted a new man so started cheating on line. Of course he never mentioned his insecurities to me so I thought all was well. Nothing physical but mental maybe just as bad if not worse. We got thru it so I knew this was going to be a huge challenge. We talk constantly about it. He does it again, he's gone. Even after almost 20 years.[/quote'] I definitely feel like he made this move because he thought that I was gonna leave him. It was the furthest thing from my mind. Ironically enough I am at 170 lbs. Sent from my Nexus S 4G using RNYTalk Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lovealways 287 Posted January 20, 2013 My 9 year relationship has been on the rocks lately and I feel this surgery will cause even more tension. It's a lot of changes, new goals, new confidence, priorities change, and it's a big transition. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mom2lucky (suznc) 81 Posted January 20, 2013 I got divorced several years ago after losing 100 lbs (29 yr total relationship). Long story but I finally had courage to move on due to my accomplishments with weight & working out. I had so little self confidence under all that weight, i never believed i could make it on my own but i did. I met my current man around the time I was at my smallest & proceeded to gain everything back + more. We lived 3 hrs apart so back & forth made it hard to workout, eat right, etc. My guy stuck with me even though i got so fat & moved here over a year ago & is excited about our new healthier lifestyle. (He's only 15 lbs overweight) He bought us both mountain bikes & I can't wait for warmer weather so we can hit the trails. 1 sky reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bakawaka 108 Posted January 20, 2013 My significant other moved out two weeks ago. I am now officially a statistic...despite my broken heart I still have no regrets. I'm lost and confused but at least now I'm 115 lbs lighter and I get endless date offers. Can't speak for everyone else but my situation got increasingly worse with every pound that I lost. People get used to you being morbidly obese and sometimes they don't know how to deal with you when you are no longer unhappy with yourself Sent from my Nexus S 4G using RNYTalk A wonderful relationship is in your future. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites