Shrinking Violets -- April 07 Bandsters

[Kat817 19]

There is so much I want to say to each of you, I just do not have it in me tonight. My allergies/cold dilemma is a sinus infection I do believe. Rick and I went after a load of wood for my Dad today, and took Kinsey with us, I was miserable---now I am miserable and exhausted!!!

We went out to dinner after cleaning up. I ordered a beef chimichanga....they brought me chicken, and their chicken is all breast and too dry for me, so I sent it back, and very quickly they had my right beef one to me, and 3 bites into it, it got cold....the meat is cooked---but was cold........so it too went back, and I was just too tired, and stuffy to care about waiting, so we come home. They paid for Ricks meal.

Now I am just going to bed!!!

Haydee, I only sent out the list to those that were on it....so that is why you didn't receive it. Either you or Laura can PM me your info and I will add it on, and get the list off to you. Then you can let Laura know if you want in on the Christmas gift exchange.

I did not mean to slight anyone---anyone who wants in on the list exchange is welcome, I just figured the ones I hadn't heard from were opting out....

OK....well I will be without electricity tomorrow, they are replacing the pole behind our house, and our pole has the transformer, so it will be out several hours. Will be back tomorrow night. Hopefully Judy and I will both be feeling better!!!!

Tracy glad the tooth is gone.

Tracy, be proud of the band and beat the crap out of whoever outed you!!!

I give up guys I can't finish!!!

Kat

[kity 2]

Hey Violets~

I haven't been here for 15 hours and I had 2 pages to read. I will try to remember.

TracyK~ Congrats. sleep well my violet sista!

TracyKS~ Kick ass and take names. Who did it? What happened? We want details!

Judy and Kat~ I hope your feeling better soon! xoxo

Haydee~ Thanks for making me feel not sooo alone in this. It is nice to know you and Terry are like me...I am sure more are too! There is nothing wrong w/ us...we are just less motivated.

Well, I had an interesting afternoon. First of all, I ate 2 pieces of pizza today and salad. Glad I made the fill appointment. He numbed my tummy as usual, then he made one deep poke into me and hit a freakin nerve. I cried out, and yelled, "take it out, take it out!" I began to cry, it burned so bad even after it was taken out. I laid there and cried, it hurt soooooo bad. He said I have some kind of nerve there that has not healed yet, since the last fill I guess. He numbed me more, then went on to the fill. I laid there w/ tears streaming down my face and mascara smearing I am sure. He first took all 2 cc's out, I hadn't lost any which is good. He makes me drink as he puts more in. He had me at 2.8, then the Water started girgling (sp) in my throat and mouth. He moved to 2.7, and we were gonna stay there...but I could tell it was still a bit tight. I was worried that after a few days, it might get tooooo tight. We settled on 2.4. I also bought a weeks worth of Opti fast (the pre op diet) just to have for Breakfast and lunch, and snack...then a Healthy Choice for dinner. I just want to kick it into gear for a week. Hopefull, by next week, I can break through the -30. I am gonna make spagetti for Susanne this weekend (her fav), but I will not go there. I WANT IT THAT BAD. I am going to a wine tasting tomorrow...that is liquid right? Then Jazzercise Sat morning!

Have a great night. Sleep Well!

[adorable 1]

ARGHHHH (warning: food PORN!)!!! I was bad and I feel SO guilty. They had a staff appreciation bbq at my work today and I had 1 bbq pork rib, spicy chicken breast, scalloped potatoes, green Beans w/bacon, salad, and a piece of peach pie....then I ate dinner. I had like 1350 calories today!!! That may not seem like a lot to some of you but I try to stay under 1000 calories a day.

Ok tomorrow is another day....

I hope everyone else had a great day! Mine tasted so good LOL

[adorable 1]

I discovered something I really liked to eat yesterday!

I've never had canned chicken.. sounded pretty gross. But we went to Wal-greens and I wanted something I could fix quickly for lunch.. I use to like canned tuna, but some reason it nauseates me now.

So, canned chicken it is! Said its 2.5 servings in a can, 50c per serving, and 10g of Protein per serving! 110c for the whole thing, and 25g of protein. Wowee!

Then I realized Miracle Whip has a lot less calories than Mayonaise (we keep both), so I put a small squirt of MW and a squirt of relish.. mixed it up. I was nervous.. it looked like tuna.. felt like tuna.. even smelled like tuna.. I thought oh boy, this is gonna be nasty.

But then first bite-- YUM! It was sooo good, and it went down fine. It's my new favorite food, I'm going grocery shopping tonight and stocking up on a cabinet of these. Perfect for lunch. It's about 200 calories total (a bit less)for the salad I make.

Even though it's breast meat, its very moist and chewy like tuna/dark meat chicken.

If I remember correctly you hate nuts but I make the same thing with fat free mayo, celery, shallots and toasted pine nuts...it's fantastic! My entire family loves it.

[Jennifur 0]

Mornng gals

Kat & Judy, I hope you are feeling better,, I started antibiotics yesterday for my thorat, still not good, take care of yourselves

Laura- I do the canned chicken as a change here and there, Hellmans makes a low fat mayo, light blue lid, and it is not as thick as regular but pretty good. I sometimes put small pcs of tomatoe and onion in there. I'm glad you like it and can eat it. You can use it for some of those crock pot chicken dishes.

Denise - today is another day - you will do fine, and every once in a while we should be bad, as long as you don't do it every day

Pamela, I'm sorry you had such a bad fill experience but I'm glad you got one. I can't wait for mine! I ate 1/2 pc of mexican pizza the other night, i can't eat just cheese, it gets stuck but I cut it up into very tiny pcs and yup, at the entire thing.

So i'm tight, bloated this am. I had my first night with mom last night, and I never ever drink wine, well I had 2 glasses last night and could feel myself swelling, and I was WASTED!!!! talk about cheap date, but we had such a good night.

and Yesterday.... what a day... and here is why I needed wine last night. I went to lunch with the guy who has been wanting to go out, actually a bunch of people I use to work with, and you all know he fell asleep again Monday night and never came out with me. Well - it took him 2 days to call me and never offered an apology! and joking around yesterday said I am not saying I'm sorry "shit happens". So I Stormed out. I don't think it was because of him but just because that to me said YOU ARE NOTHING, YOU ARE NOT IMPORTANT, YOU DON'T DESERVE AN APOLOGY AND I AM NOT GOING TO MAKE AN ATTEMPT TO BE WITH YOU. Are you kidding. I don't think he is the one I'm going to be with for the rest of my life, but I know that going forward, I do deserve much more and someone who really wants to be with me will try to be with me, not make excuses. So anyway, he followed me out to my car after our friend made him, and said I need to let go of my past (Hello, I'm still living in it and never told him I was done with Kev dbf - never said anything) and that he wants a commitment out of me and wants me to be his girlfriend. I told him I can't do that right now. I have commitment issues and then he was trying to be all huggie kissie in the parking lot and he knows I have issues of public displays of affection. First, yes, I do want to have a steady someone in my life who wants to be with me but - I don't feel like he is the one, and second, I am just finding myself and feeling somewhat attractive and like people are looking at me like they might be interested and not she is a complete fat ass. I still love dbf but I want to be with someone, and reality is, he better shit or get off the pot. But I've been with him so long, I want to date a little, not feel like I'm tied down, I have been lost for so long. Is that selfish? Maybe, but as my heart is somewhere, he is not here with me and I'm going to live a little and take life one day at a time, and if it involves going on a date and meeting new people. so be it. It is not like I am a slut and sleep around.

Anyway, I told him that I have let him in more than anyone in a long time and that I am not ready to commit and most important him falling asleep 4 times and not making the effort to see me, how is that showing me that it is not going to be a relationship of excuses. He said if I was his girlfriend it would be different. Yeah ok.

Am I wrong here? and you wonder why i had some wine. Well as far as that goes, I felt horrible after drinking it, bloated and just yucky, so I am going to get a small bottle of Stolli to keep on hand so when she has wine i can have a drink. I have only had maybe 5 drinks since surgery but feel much better physically after a drink and not wine.

Here drinking coffee, got up to see mom off, she is going to do rakie (sp) at a cancer retreat this weekend so we are going to try to get some stuff together around here while she is gone, my aunt and uncle are going to be here next friday from LA for the week, so I will have a house full!!!

TracyK- I am so glad you got that tooth taken care of

[Jennifur 0]

holy crap what a long post... sorry

[TracyK 3]

Jennifur-no you are not wrong for wanting some wine...but like you tod denise, today is another day!! I hope the antibiotics do the trick for you!!

Pamela-sorry for your horrible fill experience. Hope you aren't filled too much!!

Judy-I am glad he finally pulled it too. I am so much better now. The little pain I do have is just from the procedure, so I can handle it!!

Kat-I hope you feel better soon!! I had an experience like that at a restauraunt too, some places just suck!

TracyKS...I do not wanna read about you in the newspaper kicking a nuns ass...so just let it roll off your back (or try to)

I hope everyone has a great day. Hard to believe its Friday, I have not been to work alot of this week, but I am still happy

[TracyinKS 7]

TracyK: I snorted coffee at your post!!!!!!!!!!! ROFLMAO!

I outed myself for the greater good.. a nurse asked me if our insurance covered the lap band... ( a person that can benefit from it) at first I tried to be all... yes we do... but as she asked more and more questions.. and she already knew that it costs 17K self pay, and other little facts about it... I could tell she was serious enough to spill my beans....... I knew that I would eventually do this, which is why I've marked up our spd with the exact qualifications.... and made a little guide.

Jennifur: OK.... this new guy is just asking for heartbreak... hell right now he is in the COURTING stage and he is already standing you up .... this trait tells me he is self centered. DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME ON HIM! If he shows you a good time that is one thing but don't invest more in him than your heart can take because he is just a rebound THANG... take it for what it is.... YOU DESERVE MORE THAN HIS CRAP... same with dbf.... you are picking guys that will continue to treat you badly because down deep that is what you EXPECT and that is what your low self esteem is telling you that you deserve.... and that my dear Violet sistah ... IS A LOAD OF CRAP!!!!!! Tell yourself over and over that you deserve more than second rate relationships and sooner or later you will really start believing it! TRUST ME.... YOU DO DESERVE MORE!

Ok.. stepping down off my soap box!

TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm down 2lbs for the week!

Everyone... remember to have a GREAT DAY!

WWJD????

[Teachlady 3]

Good morning, Violets..

Well, I do feel better today. Cold is not gone, but I can breathe better. I've been dosing with Drixoral and ZiCam. As long as it doesn't go to my throat, I'm ok to sing this Sunday and next Friday.

I'm wearing a sweater today that I have saved in my closet for probably 10 years or more. I never gave it up when I got fatter and fatter because I really liked it. Now it is bordering on being too big, but I'm going to wear the heck out of it while I can.

We are going to an overnight church meeting today. DH is excited cause he got some new long sleeved shirts in a size L. He had been wearing 3XL and they were tight. This has been such an awesome journey for both of us and we're not done yet!!

Jennifur...the one thing that you said that jumped out at me was... "He said if I was his girlfriend it would be different. " That, my dear, is a big red flag. Don't believe a word of that line!!!

TracyK..hope your day is painfree!!

Well, I'm going to finish my cottage cheese and blueberries and head to the hospital for my volunteer shift before we leave for the meeting. Everyone have a great day!! Patience, Trust and WWJD??!!

[Jennifur 0]

Tracy & Judy

I do know it is a load of bs. You said what I guess I was trying, this is the dating stage and I am disappointed now... yea right, it will be different. italian macho crap is not what I'm signing up for.

dbf, i'm pushing away i can tell, and I know I deserve better and I think that is why I'm not going to take new crapola. I do tell myself every day I deserve so much better and Mr. right is out there and will want to be with me and treat me like that. Just might be trial and error getting there.

I thank all my sister violets, for you who have a bump in the road but have truely found good men, gives me hope. One of my friends is getting married next year and she also gives me hope. He is a wonderful guy, has issues as they all do, but is good to her and her girls, so there is hope. A year ago I didn't think there was but I have grown (and shrunk lol)

Did I tell you all that when I went to the bar last night to pick up dinner (yes I was bad) a guy I use to date when I was this size in the past and who has always been nice to me didn't even say hi, he kept looking at me but not a word. Is is possible he didn't realize it was me? it was very odd.

well, off to the gym - see you all shortly

[mdrai 3]

Good Fri Morn, Vi's~~

Ugh... still 264... no matter what I do... tomorrow is my 4-mo bandiversary & I so wanted to be @ 55 or more gone... but it looks like it'll just be 53... which makes it -8 for the month... gak!... I really want to average 10-12 a month!! rickin' frickin'... grrrrr... I know I know... it's going down, blah blah... but c'mon, you all know what I mean... we *do* have expectations... but this ol' bod just doesn't seem to want to cooperate... it's gotta do what it does on it's own time... grrrrr.........

But -- on the bright side... today I am wearing my new "outfit" that I bought last week... skirt, shirt & vest... + a custom necklace & earrings that I love, lots of turquoise & coral & amber... my dd said I looked like a cowgirl! It does have a western flair to it, I guess. But I feel good in it... it's not an oversized peasant skirt & white T-shirt w/flips or white Keds (my official "PTA Mom" uniform!). I swear that when I hit goal I need to go on that "What Not To Wear" show, because I have NO idea how to dress myself style-wise... I've never had the luxury of being able to wear "whatever"... it's always been just "whatever would cover my ass"! Ha Ha!

I'm dressed "up" because I have a couple meetings today + this afternoon is the schools "Fall Fest" & everyone will be there so I wanted to look good for that.

Ack, look at the time... sorry to go on & on... sometimes I just type for me... it feels good, y'know??

JENN -- Ditto what TracyKS said. RUN, do not walk, away from that guy. Do not spend any more time/energy/emotion on it. It's not a match. "Next!"

[TerriDoodle 6]

Good Morning Sweeties!

Ok, I am definitely feeling greater restriction with just a measely 0.1cc fill. Do you realize how little that is? That is 2/100 of a teaspoon!! Blows my mind.

Jenn - You know what I think? I think that every time he says "I fell asleep" that is his code word for "I found something better to do." He just wants a lay and he wants it when it's convenient for him. GROSS! That line about "it would be different if you were my girlfriend" sounds like a line that boys use in high school for cryin' out loud! He must think you are as dumb as a post. Ignore his existance. He is a gnat...no, an amoeba...in the world of real manhood. I haven't read the book, but I have read exerpts, "He's Just Not that Into You" and one of the things I remember is that if a guy is really into you he will almost make a complete ass of himself by calling too often and wanting to see you! If he's interested, you'll KNOW it!! When I think back on the 4 serious loves of my life...they all did that. Like we were inseparable from the day we met!! That's not just a coincidence that they all 4 behaved the same way....that's what real, meaningful attraction looks like!!!

And, on the other hand, just because someone isn't that into you, doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you!!! It just means that the chemistry isn't there!! No big deal! "There's a bus every 10 minutes" as my DH is fond of telling anyone who's heartbroken. I know that a good relationship would go a long way in helping you feel better with all you have going on right now. It's hard to bear all that weight yourself. I know. And I'm sorry you have to do it. It's vastly unfair how many women have to do it alone. And, speaking of which....why is it that you won't ask your children's father face-to-face what his plan is for paying child support??? Can't he see...doesn't he understand...that you are on the verge of losing your house and car?? Is he THAT much of a bastard? And if so, why in the world are you allowing that bastard the luxury of waltzing in and out of your life as if you were an all-night drive through? I just don't get that at all. Sorry. I know you love him and that is a powerful thing. But man o man...not supporting your kids is the lowest of the low in my book. Lower than your 'sleeper' friend, the amoeba.

Ok, done with my rant.

Michelle - I'm so glad that you feel pretty today!! I just LOVE those days!!! Your outfit sounds really cute! How about a pic?? Might I remind you that anything more than 8# a month is totally unhealthy?? ....and what it implies is that you are wasting muscle tissue, not fat?? So, my dear, you are right on target. Give yourself a big kiss and jump for joy!!! You are a picture perfect bandster!!

Judy - I have never been good with the alchemy of spices....so thanks for those suggestions. I use that "Garlic Dude Dust" and it takes care of it all for me! LOL I can't tell you how many Soups I've ruined because I put some wierd spice in there that didn't belong! I wish I could take a class or something that emphasized the use of spices...I don't even know what 1/2 of them taste like.

TracyK - Sooooo glad you are feeling better. Have a nice restful day today! (are you working??!)

Lazy day here -- I'm the only one at the office in my area. Everyone scattered for the weekend....Vegas, Florida, Pennsylvania and Mexico! LOL Yet, here I sit!! Did anyone see that new show last night after Gray's Anatomy, "Big Shots"? Those guys remind me of the kind of men that I work with!!! Except that my guys are upstanding, very nice and very monogamous!...but they are all definitely a part of the country club crowd so it will be an interesting show for me.

Gray's Anatomy was awesome last night!!!

[Daisalana 33]

Kat- I sent you my info to add to the list the day I talked to you about Secret Santa.. I was on the list when you sent it to me, did you delete it ? LOL

And everyone, it may seem confusing, but if you signed up with Kat, just let me know you want to join Secret Santa. I'm not signing anyone up based on signing up with Kat for contact list.. some people may not want to do it!

Onto other things.. a girl at work said the chicken canned stuff is good in some casserole she makes, so she's giving me the recipe. I had that for dinner last night-- canned chicken, miracle whip, relish.. MMMMM.

And Terry-- it's very possible I'm from another planet

I've noticed 2/3 times when I eat during the day, I eat to the point of hurting. I'm not use to the real 'bandster restriction', so it's like I'm starting over. I need to relearn. I knew the limits of my band before, since I lived with it for all these months.. but now it's so different

Yesterday at lunch, I decided on bacon-wrapped scallops. I got 4 of them (they aren't the small scallops, but they're not the big ones either). I'm eating.. slowly.. took me 45 minutes to finish the 4.. But a couple bites 'hurt' because I didn't chew enough I guess.. and then, by time we were done with lunch and I was driving back to work, I had that 'overate at thanksgiving' feeling. I hurt sooo bad, my stomach felt like I had been gorging all day. But when I was eating the scallops, I guess I didn't notice it coming on.. and my brain didn't believe 4 scallops would stuff me like that.

Listening to what you ate Denise, that's like me at our company cookout last week. I ate smaller portions, but I was able to pick at several things. Now? Now I can only eat 1 thing at a time, and it's a lot of work.

It's good I guess, just wish I could snap into shape quicker! My brain needs to catch up.

On that note, I was 281lbs last night! Yaysa!

[Jennifur 0]

Well ladies, thank you all so much, it is funny because that is just how I feel lately, I'm much stronger than I was 6 months ago. But as you said Terry, If he is into you then he will make an ass of himself. Well, I have had 4 loves of my life too, 3 of them went out of their way and the 4th, well he just worshiped the ground I walked on, if he was still here I think at this point in my life I would have married him. He killed himself 3 years ago. What is that saying, the one you love... the one that loves you... and the one we settle for???? something like that. Anyway. Moving on....

I want to be equal not last in line anymore.

well back from the gym, eating a salad with chicken on it, I'm starving.

[Jennifur 0]

Well, I forgot, this guy was here for a reason, I now realize that people are interested in me, no matter how sick it is, and I deserve better than this. A good transition and someone to make me realize there is so much more out there.

So he was good for something

Michelle - 8lbs in a month is 2lbs a week, right where you should be. I convince myself of that every day. LOL