connie3 43 Posted November 15, 2012 My parents worry too much and my husband doesn't support my choice in having surgery. So I'm left with a mission impossible... I'm not telling them when my surgery date is and I'm going to have a friend take me. I feel so alone and the worst part is that I LOVE to inform people about what's going on with me, so keeping it a secret is definitly going to be hard. :/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mommytyree 98 Posted November 15, 2012 Dont keep it a secret! Just tell them this is your decision and whats best for you. tell them you need thier support during this life changing time. we need all the support we can get thru this, esp from our close family. idk what i would do without my husband and mothers support thru this. 1 BBdoodle reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
worm2872 635 Posted November 15, 2012 Oh I'm so sorry! I told my mom only a short time before. So far she's been ok. I'm not telling people at work. What are you going to go after?? Good luck. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Camprn25 8 Posted November 15, 2012 I let my daughter son and close friends know as I was moving thru the preop process. My mom and sister are serious worry warts. I called them the night before surgery and told them,I expected some attempt to discourage me. I was shocked how supportive they have been, Besides a nightly phone call from each of them My son (25) is still not happy with my decision so he just doesnt discuss it. Though he did come to the hospital 2x's a day and brought flowers from him and his roommates ( but I think they shamed him into it). You will need the support of the people closest to you. I had to spend a LONG time educating my husband on how my life will/has changed.And why I made this decision. He fall back answer is I love you no matter what you weigh. This board is a good source of support for all stages of your prep and recovery. Best wishes for your surgery and recovery. CMP 2 ladyspl and Cheryl Barfoot reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mommy2boys 40 Posted November 16, 2012 Omg Connie I'm in the same boat. My parents worry when o go to the dentist., my husband is not for this. Il going it pretty much alone. Thankfully my husband is starting to come around. But other then that no one knows Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyspl 161 Posted November 17, 2012 Awww honey, I'm sorry you feel this way, but please do tell someone, as much as this is physical its also mental. We are all family here and will love and support you no matter what. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pointer 92 Posted November 19, 2012 No keep it a secret u can call them on ur way to the hospital. I've learned over the last 5 years family can ruin things and u are the one left suffering. Don't be alone be happy and u have ur friend. Don't let them ruin this time for u. I have ny surgery on 11/28 and I'm texting my sisters and calling my mom when I get to the hospital. Bc i let them dictate my decision and now I am left heavier and more miserable. So thank God this time my hubby is supportive but I swear I could care less at this point. No one matters but me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TinyMamiOf3kids 1,280 Posted November 19, 2012 I wish I would had kept it a secret but who would had watch my 3 kids? The reason why I say thus is cuz every so often I get the "you need to throw up" you can't eat what you want. Are you sure you can have a piece of candy.< /p> Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pointer 92 Posted November 19, 2012 Do u have a good friend someone who can help with the kids that won't spread ur business. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vicki Loichinger 444 Posted November 19, 2012 My Mom passed this past Christmas but I am telling you I wouldn't have wanted to tell her. She was the perfect person to make everything about her. She would have drove me nuts. And it is kind of sad cause you know when you are sick and not feeling good sometimes you want your "mommy" and that was always sad that I couldn't depend on her for "ME" I always had to protect her from worrying or protect myself from her . Very hard to explain, And even now waiting to have the revision from the band to the RNY, you hate to talk about it to people, cause they say things like "you had that there band thing and that didn't work did it?" ya da ya da ya da. Tell those that you know will support you and be there to put a cool cloth on your head that is what you need. 1 Maggie0557 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TinyMamiOf3kids 1,280 Posted November 19, 2012 My Mom passed this past Christmas but I am telling you I wouldn't have wanted to tell her. She was the perfect person to make everything about her. She would have drove me nuts. And it is kind of sad cause you know when you are sick and not feeling good sometimes you want your "mommy" and that was always sad that I couldn't depend on her for "ME" I always had to protect her from worrying or protect myself from her . Very hard to explain' date='And even now waiting to have the revision from the band to the RNY, you hate to talk about it to people, cause they say things like "you had that there band thing and that didn't work did it?" ya da ya da ya da. Tell those that you know will support you and be there to put a cool cloth on your head that is what you need.[/quote'] I understand what your talking about. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vicki Loichinger 444 Posted November 19, 2012 thanks mamio, it is weird and so nice to know somebody understands. Hugs to you and your crew today, Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TinyMamiOf3kids 1,280 Posted November 19, 2012 thanks mamio' date=' it is weird and so nice to know somebody understands.Hugs to you and your crew today,[/quote'] Thanks I'm at stall this week but maybe next week will be the breaking point. Only 5 more pounds to go. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
slowtogo 301 Posted November 19, 2012 thanks mamio' date=' it is weird and so nice to know somebody understands.Hugs to you and your crew today,[/quote'] ((hugs)) we are here for you... 1 Vicki Loichinger reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pointer 92 Posted November 19, 2012 Definitely here for u 1 TinyMamiOf3kids reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites