Anyone Else Doing This 'alone' In One Way Or Another?

[worm2872 635]

I feel so alone.... I have my hubby and BF but I have gone through all the meetings and testing alone. I'm going through a big bariatric center and it seems everyone has a support person with them. Then there is me... Alone. Work does not know what my surgery is for incase it would not be approved off. Hubby works way to far away and has very little time to take off. My BF had her hubby, mom and another friend going with her to appointments and meetings. My mom is going to come stay with me for a few days after and thinks we are going to do house projects? WTH? So even when I do explain the situation to people they don't listen.

I have this feeling something is going to happen to me and no one is going to know what to do. I have visions of me lying on the floor and people poking me with a stick. I guess I am just getting scared and I feel like a freak sometimes.

[Cheryl Barfoot 69]

i know how you feel! everything will be fine! i did it with just my 4 yo daughter to help me! yea it sucks going alone but we gotta do what we gotta do to get where we need to be! good luck and hugs!

[NurseTAB 65]

I was the same way with both surgeries I had the band and bypass was a very lonely process and even though I gave my family the information I received at my appointments and meetings with the doc they never seemed to really get it. I am 7 weeks post op and they still don't understand my diet and try to give me to much food. This website has really helped because I can ask questions and vent and people know things on here that most support people wouldn't. If ya ever need to talk or vent I'm here for ya and I'm sure everyone else on the site feels the same way.

[Baker_gurl 119]

I went to all of my pre surgery appointments alone. I wish my husband could have been to some of the nutrition classes so he could understand the parameters of my new diet. He keeps offering me things I can't have. He's not being mean, but he doesn't remember or just doesn't know that certain things are off limits now. During my surgery and on my one week post op appt, my mom was there with me since I couldn't drive.

[slowtogo 301]

I did it alone at first...pray about it...God is with you...

[worm2872 635]

Thanks all. I just know my mom is going to freak out the first time we go out to eat and I order a cup Soup and not finsh it. Or when they realize what I have done... I don't think they realize how drastic this all is.

[Vicki Loichinger 444]

Funny you mentioned this today. As I was driving by myself to all my pre op stuff today It hit me, I am kinda doing this by myself. Yes my husband will be there the day of surgery, but I haven't ask him to come to any of the apts. or classes or support groups. And I really don't see my sisters being there the day of surgery or any of my sons. I am not sure they realize how drastic this is either.

Since I had the lap band already and I did that out of state and was alone for that, Husband stayed to make sure I survived then came two days later to take me home.

Maybe we act to strong for our own good sometimes. I am just not good at asking for help or hate to feel like I am imposing so I do it alone. Kinda sucks really.

Just wanted you to know I understand what you mean Heather

[OleHippieGal 275]

Funny you mentioned this today. As I was driving by myself to all my pre op stuff today It hit me, I am kinda doing this by myself. Yes my husband will be there the day of surgery, but I haven't ask him to come to any of the apts. or classes or support groups. And I really don't see my sisters being there the day of surgery or any of my sons. I am not sure they realize how drastic this is either.

Since I had the lap band already and I did that out of state and was alone for that, Husband stayed to make sure I survived then came two days later to take me home.

Maybe we act to strong for our own good sometimes. I am just not good at asking for help or hate to feel like I am imposing so I do it alone. Kinda sucks really.

Just wanted you to know I understand what you mean Heather

this is almost me to a T, hubby doesnt talk about it at all, doesnt ask me anything except that he will be there for surgery, I think he is afraid I will ask his 400 lb ass to do it too, but I dont care what he does, he has been overweight since he was 5, claims he knows how to lose weight but chooses not to, whatever, I am ready and almost done, just waiting for the surgery. I dont have any close friends here in Missouri, all my friends are in dallas or mississippi, so yea I am so alone, and wished I had a friend to do this with here close by.

[snow25 188]

I am a single mom with a very active child. I can't wait to be able to keep up with him again! I'm alone in my house as far as having help on the daily. I live a plane ride away from all family, but I do not feel all alone. My mom, dad, and sister have been super supportive via phone calls and emails. I have family that will come down for the surgery and stay the first week. I don't think being alone will be an issue.

[mizzlaw 130]

I did everything alone, my husband did not even visit me at hospital..... Talk about loneliness.....may god give you strength

[slowtogo 301]

How are you doing now, mizzlaw?

[marta 8]

Worm you wrote exactly what I'm going thru. My parents have passed, I know they both would of been supportive. I'm not married, I live with my son, his wife and 2 kids. He doesn't take anything to do with me seriously. Main reason I'm having this surgery is my Dr told me my liver would be severely damaged within 2 years. I've been in the hospital for internal bleeding and received a blood transfusion. I was alone the entire time. I could go on and on. I used to cry and get upset, I just do what I gotta do and move forward and think about taking care of me. My brother is also passed and my sister lives in Australia, no other family, I have a close friend but she's in Virginia and I'm in California. I know my mom is always with me and that's all I need. Hang in there worm, concentrate on your life. If you ever need to talk or vent. I'm a great listener.

[mizzlaw 130]

How are you doing now, mizzlaw?

I am doing good, down 20lbs since surgery (10/3), i realize i am stronger han i thought , ty for asking

[stellar313 26]

I did all my preop appointments, tests, and classes by myself - except the EGD, which my husband came. My husband and dad were there the day of surgery, my husband took the day of surgery, the day after, and my first day home off work. I had a couple friends visit at the hospital. My mom passed away almost 2 years ago, she was obese and had many issues from it. Spent her last 3mos in hospitals and nursing home. She made me promise to not end up like her. So I think she was there with me too, she was always my biggest support and confidant, so this whole process just makes me miss her more!

[dot 2]

well and didt have that it just me but am ok because i;am doing it for me this time ,,dot