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Now I'm having 2nd thoughts...Need some feedback!



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Well, I fought tooth and nail to get this surgery and on 2/22 it will happen! The problem is that I'm having 2nd thoughts. I'm afraid that I won't feel satisfied with what I'll be allowed to eat afterwards...My friend had RNY around Thanksgiving, lost 40 pounds so far, looks a lot better, and has to FORCE herself to eat. I'm wondering if I should've gone for that. I hope the band will make me feel the same about food as her, but that's not what I'm getting the impression of on some of the posts here. I know we're all different, but I'm really scared :hungry: .

Will I have to wait a long time after insertion to get a fill? How do they know how much to put in? Was anyone starving before first fill?

H E L P !!!!!

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Hi--take a deep breath!! It is all going to be ok, even if you do decide to change directions, the point is you have decided to do something!

There are definite pros and cons to each surgery, and your own lifestyle and your current health for instance will help you decide what is right for you. I can give you the reasons I chose banding---but it is a very personal decision.

I have had 2 fills, and while I don't have to force myself to eat, I often forget to eat, if I am busy. The emotional eating out of boredom etc, can still be an issue with me, but it would have been the same with bypass...it is referred to around here as "head hunger"---for good reason, my belly is not hungry, I want the physical act of eating...and food has been my "best friend" for many years. It was always there, good times, bad times, adn everything between.

Yes there will likely be a time where you are hungry as you heal. In order not to alter your body permanently as in bypass, when they put the band on, they will pull up a portion of the lower (larger) stomach and stitch it over the band to hold it in place securely. You must stay on liquids during this time to assure it will heal properly...not digesting food gives the stomach time to be still. Most Dr.s wait from 6-8 weeks before the first fill. The stomach is swollen from surgery for awhile, so there is not hunger, but as the swelling goes down, yes you will feel some hunger. As you heal, you can eat to assuage that....and then you can begin the fill process. With my first fill I did not get much restriction, but I could not eat anything like I used to the amount was lessened, and I was forced to eat slower and chew well to assure it was pain free! Then I got good restriction with my second fill and have not been hungry since then. That was back in July. I will say although I felt hunger, I lost weight at a steady pace, even then...the amount I was eating at each sitting, was reduced significantly. I have no plans at this point in time for another fill...when I can eat much more, or I am no longer full for several hours following eating, then I will. Fills are not a big deal! Each Dr. seems to have his own schedule for fill amounts. I was given 1.25cc. the first fill, and just another .50 the second was all it took to achieve the restriction I was wanting. There are full threads comparing what each Dr. has used as a fill schedule.

You will lose weight at a slower pace than your friend with RNY, but studies show at 2 years out we are all in the same weight loss range, and the need for follow up plastic surgery is lessened with the slower, steadier loss. You will also be able to get your nutrients through food as opposed to expensive supplements--food alone will keep you from being malnourished. Most RNY patients cannot tolerate sweets, they lead to "dumping", sudden uncontrollable, diarrhea. I personally wanted to lead as normal of a life as possible. I wanted to eat cake at my grandkids birthdays---I just wanted to be satisfied with a small piece, and not half the cake! I can do that now. I eat small, healthy meals. When you are not hungry you can make much wiser choices in your food intake. When you come in starving you just grab the closest thing at hand---and it is usually a bag of chips or Cookies. Now, I can take time to get me something filling and healthy, because I am not dying to eat.

Now my personal reasons for opting with the band. First of all, it is reversible if need be. Not knowing how I would react to any WLS, this seemed less dangerous. Added to that, I am a cancer survivor--that increases my odds of recurrence. With the band, if I should have a recurrence, I can have my fill removed, in order to get the needed nutrition or treatment during an illness. I also keep hearing on the news about them isolating the gene that causes obesity etc. I figured with the band being reversible, if they find a "cure", I will still be able to take advantage of the discovery. As it is right now, they have developed a new band. It will be adjusted by remote control. No port, no tubing, no needles. The Dr. will calibrate and adjust by remote. With the band, if we were to choose to change ours out---we can. Once they cut away the majority of your stomach--it is GONE!!!

And lastly---sorry this has been so long---you do read on here about a lot of hunger, and complications. But if you will go to the home page, and find the number of members on LBT--the number is high!!! But there are nowhere near that many posting. Once the majority are banded, and trouble free, they are not here posting...the ones here, are the newbies, and those with problems. There are some like me (and I am still new to this really) who just hang out due to friendships made, and just to yack!! But we don't get daily posts from the ones doing just fine, and sailing along...the board would be full of threads "Another Great Day" , " Still Going Strong", You get the idea----I think it would be awesome to see the numbers tho!!!

I would also look into the numbers of people regaining weight following RNY---as there is not any way to adjust it.

So yes, you may get hungry, but we have all dieted in the past and survived it. In my opinion a few days of hunger for a lifetime of an intact, healthier body---was an easy decision.

I hope your nerves calm down, and that you make a decision that will allow you to have a healthy happy surgery and life!!

Kat

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I wasn't hungry before my first fill at 6 weeks. I just needed more restriction. Everyone is different. You doctor might be an agressive filler or not. Mine tended to just add a little then a little more. You will be fine. The lapband is the best. You may find that you don't lose as fast as your friend but just remember this is a life long change. It may take you up to 2 years to reach your goal. Best of luck.

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Dotofoz....

I am also booked for my surgery Feb.22 in Toronto @ TLBC. It is not covered and will cost $16k. It is the hardest comittment I have ever had to make, but I know that the results are still dependant on what choices i make (ie excercise and healthy food choices) For me, I am so disapointed that i have allowed myself to let it come to this. I feel like a failure in that i cannot control my eating and the result has caused me to virtually be infertile @320lbs. Even the fertility dr's won't consider treating me, but that still wasn't enough to get me to stop over eating..... At this point, it 's either LB or try to lose enough weight on my own to get approved for IVF, which would cost just as much, if not more, than the band.......

My point is, what do you have to lose but weight!!!! That's how i have to look at it. I am slowing allowing myself to feel ok about accepting that i need help, and in my case, hopefully its the band. I sought out this surgery back in 2001,when it was only $10K, but decided not do do it and i don't want to have that kind of regret again..... I also feel more comfortable with the band because its not permanent and if something does go wrong, it can be removed......

Good luck!!!

Jill

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Thanks for reading my post and responding! I guess I'm just antsy, period. As stupid as it sounds, I'm afraid I'll either wake up during the surgery and they won't know it or I'll gag on the tube down my throat. Yes, too much DiscoveryHealth Channel, I know. Last nite I had a dream that my husband was with me waiting to go in the operating room at a hospital in Silver Spring, MD and I ate half a bowl of his chili 30 minutes before the operation. Problem....I H A T E CHILI, and I haven't lived in MD for over 10 years!!!! It was so real, I even remember what time is was, 1:40 pm because I "looked" at my watch (in the dream)! Guess you know where my mind's at. Honestly, I picked the band because of the fact(s) that recovery time is less (main reason), it can be adjusted IF I decide to have a second (and last) child, and the weigh loss is slower so I might have less chance of saggy skin. I kinda answered my own question I know, it's just my mind's running 100 miles/hour! Thanks for the peptalk!

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Yeah, the fear of surgery was a biggie!!! I must say tho, that my MIL woke up during her double knee replacement, and even though she was awake enough to actually tell them later what she remembered, she said there was no pain, no fear, and she didn't even realize she was intubated. If she had not been able to tell the Dr. that the nurse was talking about a dog bite, no one would have believed her---including herself she said!!! She said it was surreal, and nothing to make her leery of any future surgeries, in fact it calmed her down, knowing it wasn't like suddenly being wide awake and aware. She has had surgery since without issue.

I was out right through it, in fact I resented the hell out of the nurse wanting me to wake up....I was sleeping good!!!

You'll be fine.....nerves are normal. Your dream makes me think of the commercials with Abe Lincoln and the groundhog (or whatever it is) dreams sometimes seem so real!!!

Kat

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Regarding your friend who has to force herself to eat... there was a period of time where I kind of had to do that. I didn't feel hungry, and surgery was still decently knew, so head hunger was still at bay. I went on a business trip with my mom (who is also my boss), and I'd been eating like 3 'half meals' a day. All she talked about was how pale I was, and how I didn't look "well'. She helped remind me to eat a few more times a day (not a lot, just to get more nutrition in throughout the day) and it helped ALOT. I really don't want to go through another period like that.

Not that I have much to worry about, I'm still working on the head hunger thing now that it's come back, heh.

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What you are feeling is totally normal. As the big day approaches, it's pretty typical to have moments of "Oh my God, what am I doing???" The other thing you should prepare for is a short period of mourning/depression just before the surgery. I can't explain why it happens, but I've seen it happen a lot around here, and it certainly happened to me.

I think you just have to trust the decision you made when your head was clearer. The fact is, you wouldn't be doing this if you hadn't already tried everything else. And as for the GB, you can get converted to that if you have problems with the band. Yeah, it's another surgery, but just as with the band, if you have to do it, you just have to do it. I wish you the best of luck. I'm sure everything will turn out ok

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I went, and still kind of go through what your friend with RNY described to you. It's not so much that I force myself to eat, but that food has become something I have to interrupt my day to do. Honestly, I've had to put pup-up reminders in my calendar at work for lunch, because otherwise I'd be perfectly content to go through the day with only eating dinner... but my calorie count doesn't like that much.

I have a friend with RNY who tells me something similar. My reasoning is because food just doesn't control me, it's no longer at the front of my mind, so it becomes easily forgotten (like cleaning the house!) Her reason is that everything makes her sick, and she's limited to such a small choice of foods, and gets so tired of them, that she'll just not eat.

As for your questions:

Will I have to wait a long time after insertion to get a fill? I think the average wait is 4 - 6 weeks. My first fill was right at 6 weeks. Or maybe it was 5. Can't remember. :D

How do they know how much to put in? A lot of surgeons seem to follow guidelines that are determined by the size of your band, and influenced by how much you've lost when you go for the fill. My surgeon does between 1 and 2cc in a 4cc band, or 4cc in a 10cc band.

Was anyone starving before first fill? Some do, I was lucky. I lost my appetite 2 days before surgery and it never has returned.

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Dotofoz....

I am also booked for my surgery Feb.22 in Toronto @ TLBC. It is not covered and will cost $16k. It is the hardest comittment I have ever had to make, but I know that the results are still dependant on what choices i make (ie excercise and healthy food choices) For me, I am so disapointed that i have allowed myself to let it come to this. I feel like a failure in that i cannot control my eating and the result has caused me to virtually be infertile @320lbs. Even the fertility dr's won't consider treating me, but that still wasn't enough to get me to stop over eating..... At this point, it 's either LB or try to lose enough weight on my own to get approved for IVF, which would cost just as much, if not more, than the band.......

My point is, what do you have to lose but weight!!!! That's how i have to look at it. I am slowing allowing myself to feel ok about accepting that i need help, and in my case, hopefully its the band. I sought out this surgery back in 2001,when it was only $10K, but decided not do do it and i don't want to have that kind of regret again..... I also feel more comfortable with the band because its not permanent and if something does go wrong, it can be removed......

Good luck!!!

Jill

Well, I guess I should be thankful that not only does my insurance pay for 99% of the procedure/testing, but I already have a wonderful healthy 3 year old son. Jill, I hope things work out for you not only w/the weight issue, but the infertility also. For me, the prenatal risks are just too much for me to go through because of my weight (242, 4'11") to have another. God willing, we'll both get down to a safe weight and have children when we plan and all will go well. I think this surgery is the last resort for me. I am determined to be healthy for my son. My mom died of breast cancer when I was 12 (after being gravely ill on and off for 7 years), my dad was wonderful and did the best he could, but growing up w/o a mom, really sucked and I think about it every day, even 24 years later. I am determined to be there for my son as he grows up, gets an education, and experiences all the milestones that I missed out on with my mom. I know a relationship between a mom and daughter is not the same as w/a son, but I still need to be healthy so he has me.

Good luck, I'll be thinking about you on 2/22!

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I too went through some of the same things you are facing. When I initially decided to have surgery, it was LapBand and LapBand only. After I met with surgeon #1, however, I changed my mind to the RNY. I didn't want to lose it quicker, I was just afraid to have the LapBand, and not lose all the weight I intended to. I never liked the idea of the rerouting my insides or dealing with malabsorption, but I was just so afraid of choosing the less aggressive approach and failing. After visiting with 2 more surgeons and the psychiatrist (psych. eval.) I was swayed back to my initial choice of the lapband. They felt that it would be a better option for me, especially because I am not done having my babies (God willing of course). They also believed that because I was not a big consumer of liquid calories - ice cream, regular soda, juice, etc., The band should work well for me if I was willing to do my part. They were very clear that food choice would play a huge part in my success with the band, but assured me that the same was true of RNY patients for longterm success. While they may lose rapidly initially, if they do not make lifestyle changes as well, the weight WILL come back. I know someone who regained all 200+ pounds after an RNY, so I knew they weren't BSing me.

While I recommitted to the LapBand, I still had doubts leading up to my surgery date. I sobbed on the OR table, wondering if I picked the right surgery. And yes, I was hungry soon after surgery (pre-fill), so I even doubted my decision until my fills started to take. But in the big weight loss picture , what is a few additional weeks of hunger when you have your whole life ahead of you? Worth the trade off in my opinion. And let me assure you... after my 2nd fill (the magical one), it has been relatively smooth sailing for me ever since (Thankfully.

Whatever you decide, good luck to you. Keep us posted.

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