Husband Mr Big Mouth

[elvislover 14]

My husband told me a couple of weeks ago that he saw one of my former coworkers and told her I was having the RNY. I asked him not to tell people because it isn't their business. The town we live in is full of judgmental assholes and the last thing I need is for them looking down at me because of that. Well I thought he understood. He just told me that 3 other people will be thinking of me tomorrow. I asked him what he told them and he said that I was having the surgery. I asked him if he told them the kind of surgery and he said yes because they'll figure it out sooner or later. This caused an instant reaction from me and we got into it. I dont care for people knowing I'm having surgery but it's none of their business what type of surgery unless ME MYSELF or I tells them!!! Am I wrong to be embarrassed that people know?? That's one of my mental issues I have to get passed too, I always worry what everyone else thinks about me. Any advice!?

[TinyMamiOf3kids 1,280]

It's not his job to spread the cheese around

[my3stars 88]

Although as your hubby this also affects him, in my opinion it is your news to tell. I had RNY 8 yrs. ago and I still get upset when my boss tells other people although I have asked her not too. I actually do not mind telling anyone that asks ME, but again it is not her news to tell.

[kiwiladydee 402]

My husband told me a couple of weeks ago that he saw one of my former coworkers and told her I was having the RNY. I asked him not to tell people because it isn't their business. The town we live in is full of judgmental assholes and the last thing I need is for them looking down at me because of that. Well I thought he understood. He just told me that 3 other people will be thinking of me tomorrow. I asked him what he told them and he said that I was having the surgery. I asked him if he told them the kind of surgery and he said yes because they'll figure it out sooner or later. This caused an instant reaction from me and we got into it. I dont care for people knowing I'm having surgery but it's none of their business what type of surgery unless ME MYSELF or I tells them!!! Am I wrong to be embarrassed that people know?? That's one of my mental issues I have to get passed too' date=' I always worry what everyone else thinks about me. Any advice!?[/quote']

I think he really should have respected your wishes. Everyone does not have the same results with surgery nor do they handle the ups and downs the same. This also gives them just enough room to input their opinions when they see you. Furthermore - what if you wanted to have a little cheat day and all your co- workers are watching / judging you?

[aleyampat 22]

I completely understand your frustration. The unit I work on is a gyn oncology and high risk pregnancy unit. I know strange combo;) As a result of the pts we care for many are repeat "offenders" with whom we develop close personal relationships. I told several of my pts that I was going for surgery and why. They will wonder and worry when they don't see me for 6 weeks. Some are in weekly for chemo. I did not see about 5 of them in the week preceding and now they've been asking. Some of the nurses told them where I was. I was a bit perturbed. Not my coworkers place to tell our pts. Esp not without okaying it with me first. Ever hear of a cell phone? How about a text saying hey so and so is asking where you've been what should I tell her? It just upsets me that they made my decision even though I would have told them myself.

[bellepink77 44]

Strange for medical personnel to share medical information of others ever hear of HIPPA?

[aleyampat 22]

Except I'm not their pt so it's not a HIPPA violation. And I wasn't really concerned with HIPPA as it may or may not apply to my issue but more so the fact that they did not ask if it was ok to tell our pts where I was. I thought that was rude and inconsiderate on their part.