helpless

[GinnyWhite 0]

I am defeated I feel like such a failure.I have not spoken to anyone about this but I am freaked out. I have been pigging out on birthday cookie today and I can't tell if I have the right amount of restriction or not I can eat pretty much anything comfortably except dry chicken or beef. I am filled to 2.5 cc and I go back on 8/23 and I want to be filled to thr max but he keeps telling me I am tight so what is the deal is ait all mental I am stuck at the same 25 pds I lost my first month. I see the progress others are making and I get so disgusted with myself. I am a very positive person can't you tell? Seriously I am a hairdresser and big mistake I let everyone know what I was doing and now EVERYDAY every client ask me so how's it going and I want to say well let's see I puked on Tuesday binged on Wed. everything seems normal how the hell are you. Anyway I need some suggestions from you wise ones out ther in never nevre land. Thanks for letting me vent.

Dr. Spegiel

4/19/04

299/275/130

[GinnyWhite 0]

sorry about all the errors I was alittle out of control

[leatha_g 4]

You really don't want to be filled to the max. It's very distressing to be over-filled and unable to swallow your own spit. Creeping up on your 'sweet spot' is much wiser and easier on the esophagus.

This is about choices. I choose the wrong things sometimes too, but when I do, I do it with a full acknowledgement that it's going to slow my weight loss down - and it does.

Are you drinking enough Water? Are you exercising?

Go take this test and see how you answer the questions. This band is as much about adjusting our head as it is our eating.

http://bigolalaskan.com/lapband/fills.htm

Good luck!! I understand..

Leatha

[Neicy 0]

Hey Ginny, I don't think you're any different than any of us. If I had a birthday cookie looking at me, I would be pigging out on it too! If I have anything junky around the house, I manage to eat it. Junk always seems to go down smoothly for some stupid reason. I have only had one fill, and I am well restricted when I sit down to a good meal. I don't think going full blast on the restriction is a good idea either.

Try to avoid temptation, alcoholics shouldn't hang in the bar, and we shouldn't have junk food on hand. I am resolving to not buying it, starting today.

Good luck in the battle, we all fight the battle.

[Neicy 0]

Great link, Leatha. That pretty much tells the story!

[donali 57]

Ginny -

Remember, this is NOT a diet - this is for life!! Life includes b-day Cookies, and cakes, and chips, and donuts (two filled and a donut hole for me yesterday...:eek: :eek: ), and pizza, and fried chicken, and chocolate, and (insert personal weakness here... :eek:)

However... Life does need to revolve around nutritious choices the majority of the time.

You need to find a way to feel secure that your weakness foods are NOT going away or off limits, so that you indulge in them only when you really, really, really want them. It may take you forcing yourself to eat nothing but Cookies for two or three days, until you are absolutely sated and sick of them. With every bite, say to yourself, "I can have this WHENEVER I really want. I promise myself - no more dieting!" When you can't bear the thought of eating another cookie turn to the foods your body will be craving by then - nutritious Proteins and vegetables.

I don't think my suggestion will work, though, unless you believe in the core of your being that cookies will NEVER be off limits if you really want them. The question to always ask yourself in the future, of course, is, "Do I really, really want a cookie? Or am I really just thirsty, tired, bored, angry, lonely...etc? Would going for a walk, or sitting at the computer, or calling a friend, or taking a hot bath, or ??? satisfy this craving just as well?"

Practice eating nutritious foods first in IMMEDIATE response to physical hunger - do not EVER make yourself go hungry. If you are not physically hungry, try an activity other than eating when you get the urge to eat for non-physical hunger reasons. A lot of our eating is habit, and has nothing to do with the need for food.

You will not always be successful in diverting your attention away from foods you don't really wish to consume, but it gets easier with practice. Give yourself high fives when you substitue an alternative behaviour! Recognize every little success! And for the times that nothing but a cookie will do, indulge yourself and be kind. Know that you are doing the best that you can, and that you ARE getting better day by day. You DON'T have to be perfect!! Mini goals, mini steps - they all add up to success over time.

We're thinking of you, and we are all there with you, to some degree or another, every single day. Chin up, girl!

[MeganA 35]

YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

I'm pretty sure all of us can be sympathetic because we have been there/are there.

The others that posted have some great advice...so I won't repeat that. I just wanted to share what worked for me.

If I eat a whole bunch of sweets and candy and chips- I'm hungry in an hour. Even if I eat a whole snack sized bag of chips I feel hungry very shortly after. So I'd eat more- and think- my band is broken! It's not working!!!

Well, then I realized that I got stuck in the vicious carb-aholic cycle. As soon as I switched to Protein I felt so much better and wasn't hungry and my band worked! So- go to the store and get your favorite source of protein- and eat to your hearts content. I swear you will notice a difference in how you feel.

The other peice of advice I have is to try and stop the negative thinking you have going on about yourself. It's very very hard to stop the thoughts from coming that you've had for so many years. It takes a lot of work to do it...but it starts with baby steps.

Set a non-food goal for yourself today...make it one you can do easily but probably wouldn't have if you didn't have a goal. And then do it...and then Celebrate the hell out of it. Tell yourself you are fantastic and what you set your mind to- you do. Do the same thing tomorrow- and the next day, and the next day. Small goals add up quickly! Pretty soon you will be walking with your head held high and shoulders strong. Then you can start setting weekly goals, and monthly goals. But I still recommend that you keep them NON food related. Something I did- if I drank my Water for a day, I'd Celebrate, if I walked for that day, I celebrated...see- lots of celebrations! Once I got to the point where I was doing weekly goals- I'd give myself something- a magazine, a pedicure...and the monthly goals- I'd buy a magazine subscription, or a ring I spotted in a catalog- cut out and taped to my fridge- and then bought when I did yoga for a month. Now ever time I wear that ring I think of how successful I am. It's too hard to make weighing a certain number a goal- because it's so out of our hands. So make your goals something that you have total control over.

OK, so I just counted up the weeks since you had surgery- and you are AVERAGE!!!! You are down 25 pounds in 20 weeks.....ok, so most of it came off right at first, but honey- you have kept it off!!!!! This is what you can tell people who ask- I am losing an average of a pound a week which is where my doctor wants me to be. You don't have to tell them WHEN you lost it!!! Think of this- you have five more weeks to maintain your 25 pounds lost to still be average. You can get your act together in five weeks...start some new habits- clear out those negative tapes- and you'll be on your way.

You can do this! If you want to come back here to set a goal and get some cheerleading- you'd be in the right place!!

Megan

[New Hope 37]

Ginny, those are 25 pounds that are gone forever! Congratulations! I try to keep some tuna salad already mixed up in the frig. so if I get the munchies, I'll be eating Protein and filling. Also, I keep a large chilled container of water/Lite cranberry juice in the frig. The flavor satisfies my cravings and helps me get my Water load in.

[hagerteresa 3]

Hi Ginny,

Sorry you have had a tough time. I had my first plateau this week and realize where I went wrong thru out the last week and am trying to work better to improve it. I know it is tough for everyone here and there but we do get past these humps. I definitely have my weaknesses. Best of luck to you and hope things improve soon. Teresa

[GinnyWhite 0]

Thank you all so much your encouragement is a big help i am going to really try to make better choices.

[paula 4]

Hi Ginny! Im Spiegels patient too! I think I tried to "pm" you once, but since I wasnt sure how it worked it may have not gotten to you.

If you feel like you need a "fresh" start, why dont you try JUST the liquid stuff for about 2 days. Alot of times this helps rid our bodies of all the cravings the carbs makes us have and truly gives us that "fresh" start feeling we need periodically.

oh, another thought.... what about a leak???This would certainly cause you to lose the restriction feeling.

New Hope: I LOVE the idea of water/lite cranberry juice.... getting me some tomorrow!!!

[GeezerSue 7]

Originally posted by hagerteresa

Hi Ginny,

Sorry you have had a tough time. I had my first plateau this week and realize where I went wrong thru out the last week and am trying to work better to improve it. I know it is tough for everyone here and there but we do get past these humps. I definitely have my weaknesses. Best of luck to you and hope things improve soon. Teresa

Teresa..

I think that the old-timer wisdom is that a plateau is something that lasts for many weeks, sometimes months. If you expect to lose weight every week, you will eventually be disappointed. Go for a monthly average...something not so demanding of short-term performance. If you have gone a week without losing weight, you are just normal and may be doing nothing wrong.

Sue

[GeezerSue 7]

Are you using fitday? I hate having to be that accountable, but it sure does make a difference.

Can you tell us what you eat?

[GinnyWhite 0]

Well Sue I eat like ---t. But I am going to start over today Proteins are hard to eat so I stay away which of course leads me to carbs or junkfood so I will do better today. Tahnks Paula for the liquid idea I might give that a try. Thanks you guys

[DeLarla 22]

Ginny, we're all in the same boat.... that's why we all got banded out of last hope desperation (for me, anyway.) However, when I first got the band I assumed it would work all by itself. Haha, big joke, because I still have to do a lot of work myself. I really wanted some ice cream, and they were on sale, so I bought two half-gallons. One of my flavor, one of hubby's. But after having 2 huge servings, I garbage disposed the rest of mine. Sure, he thinks I'm crazy, and all my friends think I have serious mental issues, but sometimes it's the only way to keep me from eating the rest.

I'm learning to throw away food, which used to be like sticking needles in my eyes. But now if there's something tempting, and I've eaten too much, I toss it. My skinny friend once taught me to "ruin my food." She was always watching me struggle with diets, so once when we were at dinner, she saw me do the deep breath thing we do when our bellys are filled to our chests (even though we keep stuffing food in.) Before I had a chance to see what she was doing, she dumped her glass of Water and the container of salt on my yummy plate. I freaked, but she said, "Lisa, you're stuffed." I could have been mad at her, but I really loved her for doing that because she kinda trained me over the years. I still struggle, but I "ruined" my food the other day by spilling Water on it and cramming my paper towel over it.

So what if it's lame advice - it works for me. Not all the time, but it's an improvement for sure.