Reconstructive Surgery Bummer

[vlb11752 0]

Went to my support group meeting last night and the guest speaker was a plastic surgeon. I feel so discouraged right now. I've been overweight since I was 10...I'm 54...needless to say the hanging skin is horrible.

With about $50,000 I can have everything done. It might as well be $500,000. How do you choose what to have done when it all bothers you. I guess I will just never wear a bathing suit again...the thighs and arms gross me out...the stomach hangs...the back hangs...the butt is non-existent...the breasts getting kind of empty.

Oh but I FEEL better. Sorry, just had to vent. If you've got an extra few thousand laying around, send it over...lol

My hubby will love me anyway...I hope

[JJB 2]

I am having the same problem. I went to a plastic sergeon and was going to get my tummy and breasts done. He told me that he was not sure about the breasts being covered but could pretty much promise that they would cove the tt. Well they denied me and I was devistated. It was this Tuesday and I am feeling better now. But I am still upset because I know I can never afford to do this myself. I am going to try and get the breast done in a few months after I have saved up the money. But my stomach will forever hang. I just cant come up with $14,000 for something like that. I am hoping that I will be ok with myself after my boob job. Oh well at least I look good with clothes on now. I could never say that before. Well not since I was about 12 anyways. Good luck to you.

[Spydr 0]

When I got my band, I started a plastic surgery savings account. I sent the money to my parent safe deposit box about 2 hours away so I would not be able to touch it. I just mailed a little bit each week. Some weeks I would send more, some less. I knew that not going on trips and to fancy dinners was going to be worth it in the end.

I too want everything done so my doc and I have set a plan. On February 23rd, I will have both a major Tummy Tuck and tummy skin removal and a breast lift. Since I am doing both at one time I get a price break. Total will be 9500. Yeah, that's still alot but I saved for this and I had a plan. I will go back in about 6 months to do my arms and thighs. Don't have a quote on that but the ballpark is the 4000 range.

If it is the priority, you will find the money. There are some credit cards, like care credit, that pay for plastic surgery. Some docs will take payments. You just have to decide how important it is to you. For me, it was priority one after the weight came off. I had to be patient and wait a while but now, I can't believe it here!

It will come to you when it's time. Everything that is supposed to happen in life always does. It's just a matter of waiting things out. I hope you are to fund things for yourself. Taks care!

[Jachut 487]

Sucks doesnt it. I dont need a Tummy Tuck, but I would like a breast lift/slight reduction and a touch of Lipo on those last stubbourn areas.

But with cosmetic surgery not being covered by Medicare or Private Health insurance in Australia and there being no way on earth I could claim it as reconstructive its not happening.

We want to extend the house, we are about to begin paying private school fees as our oldest is starting secondary school next year, we have 2 kids to follow him, my SIL is moving to Canada for 2 years in July so we'll have to try to get the family over there from Australia for a visit at some stage and I'm still 3 years from finishing my degree and getting out into the workforce after being home raising kids for the last 12 years!

Money for cosmetic surgery? We're very comfortably off but its ridiculous to think of even beginning to find that kind of money for what amounts to vanity - as I dont seriously "need' it.

[JJB 2]

What really makes me mad is that the only reason I can not get this surgery is because my husband thinks we should save for it. Now I know that is the smart thing to do. But we have tried to save before and something always comes up. A bad washing machine or needing a new air conditioiner. It is always something. So I have managed to save up about $1500.00 and after income taxes I will have about $3000.0 total. Well I think I should be able to finance this on my own. I can pay the payment and it can be in my name alone. I do not understand why I have to be treated like a child and given permission. I guess I could understand if I had made mistakes in the past. But I havent. Anyways sorry I wanted to vent a little. This has been going on for two days. I only ned to finance like $3000. because I have realised I cant afford a Tummy Tuck. But I still really want to fill my boobs back up to where they used to be. Thanks for listening. I feel better now.

[sleepyjean 0]

That's a toughie. Do you really have to get his permission? On the one hand, I fear debt like preschoolers fear the boogeyman, so I understand where he's coming from. On the other hand, as they say in the ghetto, you are a grown-ass woman and can make your own decisions! The fact that anyone told me "no" would make me that much more determined to go ahead and do it. But marriage is a partnership and all that, so just keep talking and talking and talking to him until he sees the light. And in the meantime, put that $3k somewhere where you can earn some interest on it.

[JJB 2]

We just refinanced our house to try and make things easier on us money wise. So I do understand where he is coming from. It is just something that I really want. I am just going to try and keep talking to him. I have an appointment this Wednesday with another plastic surgeon. I am thinking about having my huband come with so he can hear what all is said. Maybe that will make a difference.

[Jachut 487]

But he hasnt said you cant have it - just that he wants to save for it. Honestly, I know you want it badly, but when it comes to spending that kind of money on yourself, really, if your husband's only request is that you save for it, I'd call that reasonable pay off.

I know this is "our" journey and all that and you do it once and you want to do it right. But somewhere reality does have to set in and if you dont have the cash right now, then you dont. And you're talking about a relatively large amount of money and your partner's opinion is just as valid as yours - if he says you can have the surgery but he doesnt want to go into debt for it, then I think that's a pretty fair trade off.

It is a bummer, but you will get the surgery one day, it doesnt really matter in the scheme of things if its not right now. Consumer debt is just such a silly spiral to get yourself into - save your debt for important things like appreciating assets.

[Spydr 0]

Something Jacqui said kind of struck me: " Money for cosmetic surgery? We're very comfortably off but its ridiculous to think of even beginning to find that kind of money for what amounts to vanity - as I dont seriously "need' it."

I am hoping you are speaking of your own situation. I am one of those people who does need some. I have an apron of skin hanging over my belly that rubs against itself to the point of bleeding several times a week.

Perhaps some would view surgery as being aboiut vanity but I can't help but get a little ticked off because those are the people who told me the Lap Band was the "easy" way out. For some, surgery is necessary. I am one of them.

I guess this is too close for me right now as I did work hard to prepare for this moment. I hope no one is offended. Sometimes things just build up and I can't hold back.

[ReneBean 3]

Spydr - for you, I think insurance probably would cover the apron removal - but not the full TT with the stitching the muscles down and all that.

I am with you - it will be necessary - but I want some vanity work, too. I stayed in the US for the band - but I am thinking I may have to go to Mexico for my "cosmetic" surgery.

:]

[Jachut 487]

Of course I'm speaking of my own situation - I'd never be able to demonstrate a need for reconstructive surgery, but like most people a bit of a nip here, a tuck there might improve things - so I wasnt even knocking vanity surgery either, I'd like a bit just as much as the next person. I was just makign the point that whilst that's a great thing to be able to do for yourself and a fitting reward for all the hard work after banding, there are other responsibilities to be met with your money and waiting a bit while you save, whilst frustrating, isnt unreasonable.

If it was truly needed in my situation, I'm still not sure I'd be able to find the money for it right now though. There's too many other very important things, such as the kids education, that would take priority. But that's all down to personal choices.

[JJB 2]

I deffinintly need my apron removed. I have had a couple times where the crease has torn and bled. That is why I was surprised that insurance would not cover it. Oh well I am trying to get over that. I will try and get that in a couple years when my little one goes to school and I can work more. I totally agree about the breast job and money and everything. I think I am more upset because it seems like a double standard in my situation. He never has to save for things or ask if he wants something. But when it is somethinglike this we should save for it. Oh well. I will keep working on it. I guess I just feel like I have lost all this weight and I still feel fat underneath all my clothes. I think I looked better naked when I weighed 309 then I do now. When I lay down naked everything just goes to the side. Dont get me wrong I am so much happier then I have ever been. I have just realized how much time I waisted being fat and I always wish I could have gotton the band years ago. So now I think I dont want to waste any more time. I want to be happy with my body now. I wish I was a patient person. But that is deffinitly not one of my qualities.:-)

[Marimaru 7]

JJB, a couple of things to you, I think you should appeal to insurance with the information that your apron causes you physical trouble. Also, you should shop your prices, because out here (CA) you can get 'deals' for Breast and Tummy for like $6500.

Vickie, I think you could probably get some of this covered by insurance if you have it. It's worth a shot. I'm going to try and appeal to my insurance folks when I want mine .

[JJB 2]

$6500 That is awesome. My boobs are going to cost about $7000 and he said my tummy would be around $10,000. I have an appointment with another Dr this wed. So we will see what he says. Maybe he can give me a deal. I will deffinitly ask. Thanks guys.

[Jachut 487]

I get that and yeah, I dont know all your other circumstances so perhaps I was making a few assumptions there. And I'm speaking about myself, where a bit of work would be nice but cant be called necessary.

I would appeal it too - if you're having problems like that, that's a different matter. .