SigmaChefSpe 24 Posted October 3, 2013 So i'm at my job and my wonderful co-workers know that I have started the liquid phase of my pre-op diet, now they are avoiding me like i have the black plague when ever it comes to food or lunch time. I love my co-workers for being so thoughtful and trying to help me resist the temptation when i'm going through a time like this however I now feel like crap becuase to me is seems like they are going out of there way to avoid me. IE we typically eat or our desk becuase we are busy, now they are eating in a different part of the building, or, not bringing in the goodies that they usually would to share with everyone. Again I understand why they are doing it, and i do appricate it alot, but becuase of the kind of person i am its making me feel like crap. Any advise out there? talking to them about it isn't helping they think i'm just being nice. PS my office is only 13 people big. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
newat52 1,613 Posted October 3, 2013 Just be honest and tell them you need to be normal, that what you eat or don't eat is your responsibility, not theirs but that you are very touched by the support, but damn it, act like your crazy selves around me so I know life is normal. Get your point across but throw in something light to make them smile. Good luck to you, you will love your sleeve! 1 nomytx reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
endless80 697 Posted October 3, 2013 They are being helpful by not eating in front of you. You are being left out and even though you understand their sentiment you still feel left out. But that's not their fault. Personally I wouldn't say a word. They're kind of doing you a favor. 3 NurseGrace, Mel1071 and Blondiee reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NurseGrace 509 Posted October 3, 2013 If I were you, I would do and say nothing. They have gone out of their way in an attempt to be courteous and sensitive to what you are dealing with so I would graciously accept that, even if its not exactly what you had in mind. If they eat around you and act normal I would imagine that would be just has hard, just different. 2 Blondiee and endless80 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dgoerlitz 96 Posted October 3, 2013 They are being helpful...BUT...once you have the surgery you are going to have to be a lot more choosy about what you eat anyways, so you might as well get used to it now. That's not to say you can never have a treat again. It's to say that there will be a lot of instances where you need to make a decision as to whether or not you need to take up space with a cookie that someone baked, versus a yogurt you brought to get your Protein for the day in. Also...they need to understand that you will be eating "real" food again at some point, and that it has to be you that makes the decision whether you can eat something or not. In my case, I will eat a little bit of what people bring in, say for a pot luck or something, but I choose more wisely. Where I used to have a bagel...now I go for the quiche or the fruit salad a lot more often. But...even this morning, I was at a Breakfast meeting and had 1/2 whole wheat bagel since it was either that or coffee cake. We will have to make choices regardless, so having to say no now is good practice. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
endless80 697 Posted October 3, 2013 And this is all temporary, remember that. You'll be back in the swing of things soon enough. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SeaLegs 38 Posted October 3, 2013 As you note, they are giving you the magnificent gift of their consideration, however misguided. But really, it's not good for ANY of you to be eating at your desks, or grazing on goodies. How did it get decided that you all didn't deserve real breaks? By all means, tell them you want to go with them! Otherwise the new culture will be you getting stuck answering phones while everyone else has a break. Maybe you could initiate morning break or teatime, when people can take turns showcasing little Snacks. Anyway this is really really important, because you are going back to this and it may impede your long term success if you don't resolve it. Make an appt with the nutritionist or counselor person...this is what they're there for! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carlotta 57 Posted October 3, 2013 I would eat my pr op food with my friends.. That is the way your life will be post op.. So why not having lunch with your friends. .thank them for their support.. But to me lunchtime with my friends is a big deal, so don't give that up.. As for Snacks, yes they can support u with not having this around the office. That is what I did ..and in had no issued.. Concentrate on the conversation , not on food they r eating Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RJ'S/beginning 5,358 Posted October 3, 2013 Trust me enjoy their consideration now..Soon they will be back to their old habits of putting things in front of you ( just to try a bite ) Habits are hard to break. As they see the weight start to come off, you'll find all kinds of different changes...Some good, some not so good... I personally think it is sweet of them to do this at one of the hardest part of the journey.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Teachamy 1,042 Posted October 3, 2013 I think the steps you are taking for your health may be making others feel awkward and embarrassed about their own choices. While I guess they are trying to be helpful, I think it's human nature to compare ourselves to others and distance ourselves in the process. Congratulations to you on this healthy decision, and the decision to be brave enough to share with everyone. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blondiee 278 Posted October 3, 2013 I'm sorry to hear that you're having a tough time but, as others have stated they really are trying to be courteous and help you in your journey. I hope things get better for you. *Hugs* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites