Rant

[rocknrollmama1980 20]

Ok I am so tired of telling people about the surgery and having them respond with " why - you don't need that" or "isn't that drastic ?" Or my new fav " I am going to change your mind"

I've responded with all the fact, that I am eligible blah blah blah and they keep proceeding with comments.

Luckily I have good support but its getting to he point where I don't even want to talk about it. I guess I need to stop telling people that I am doing it.

[unbesleevable1 420]

I learned real quick to just keep it to myself and not tell anyone that doesnt' absolutely have to know. I was originally surprised by that response also. It's shocking to them, bc they havent been thinking about it for years like we have.

[Macy6 356]

That is frustrating. It is one of the reasons I was careful with who I told (not saying you didn't) and honestly I could have still ran into this but luckily I didn't. I chose to tell my closest friends and parents, brother that I was considering it. Once I was approved I told anyone I thought would be hurt if I didn't say anything, so family, my school and classmates (who would notice my absence) and the night of my surgery I announced it to everyone via FB. It left little room for arguments and people trying to talk me out of it. Everyone has been supportive but I have had a few "horror stories" but it was too late for them to say don't do it. I am glad you do have a support system though. It is a rough road.

[Indigo1991 1,612]

If you think this is bad, weight til you lose weight! I am now at the "OMG, how much have you lost?" stage and when I tell them the number and how I did it, the number of people who go all goggle eyed and do the "you can't have lost all that/ you couldn't possibly have needed to lose all that/ where did you hide it/ eek surgery!!!" So not telling them now gives you breathing space but the opinionated will catch up with you in the end. By then you will be so healthy and fabulous, you won't care :-))))

For now, just smile and say thanks for their input - then ignore every last one of them This is your life and your business - and you know what's best for you...

[IdahoGirl32 89]

I am keeping it secret for now, which is not typical for me but its like I have this gut feeling that I would face a lot of negativity. When you let people in on personal things like this they seem to feel like they own a little bit of you and while some people treasure that vulnerability, a lot of people I know use it as an opportunity to abuse you or use your struggle to make themselves feel better. It can be subconscious, even, but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with.

[BenniA 9]

I have told very few people, and wish I hadn't. At the time surgery was just a thought so no one except my family ( husband and kids) are the only ones that know I scheduled my surgery, oh I did tell my hair dresser, but she is the only one I can tell anything, she don't judge, she is my best therapist. It's nice to have this forum to be able to talk about our concerns, ask question, and even vent. There are times that I have thoughts or feelings I don't want to post, so I write them down in a personal journal and this has helped. At this time I am the only one that can support my self the best, and thats good enough for me.

[Old self 16]

I've only told my husband and best friend who lives far away. They are both very supportive but I know the rest of my family would not be. I love them, but I don't need the negativity about this.

My mother is awful about it...when my father commented about how nice his mechanics wife looked since losing so much weight( she was sleeved) my mom pursed her lips and said "we'll she won't keep it off she goes back to her old habits."

[2Big2Skate 328]

We're here for you. That's why this place is so great. We all know how each other did it already!

Celebrate without having to 'splain! Even if we toast each other with small volumes of high Protein broth sipped through a straw!

[RCN 25]

That is frustrating. It is one of the reasons I was careful with who I told (not saying you didn't) and honestly I could have still ran into this but luckily I didn't. I chose to tell my closest friends and parents, brother that I was considering it. Once I was approved I told anyone I thought would be hurt if I didn't say anything, so family, my school and classmates (who would notice my absence) and the night of my surgery I announced it to everyone via FB. It left little room for arguments and people trying to talk me out of it. Everyone has been supportive but I have had a few "horror stories" but it was too late for them to say don't do it. I am glad you do have a support system though. It is a rough road.

I would be nervous posting it on facebook... what did you say? hahah...

[NMJG 1,266]

That's why I decided it was nobody's business except my immediate family (hubby and 2 older kids). I applaud those who have been open, because the c*#p you have to deal with is so obnoxious. People can be so ignorant and hurtful. I'm sure my sister would have been the worst LOL.

[FitnFabfor2014 358]

I have chosen to tell nobody. And when my surgery date comes I will only tell my Son and Mother. I agree it's nobodies business and I don't want to hear it.

[Macy6 356]

I would be nervous posting it on facebook... what did you say? hahah...

I said.... and I quote.... "Thank you Everyone for your prayers and thoughts yesterday. I had surgery yesterday, it was something I had only shared with a select few, more because of the nature of the process. I started the process in January and had my surgery yesterday. I had the vertical sleeve gastrectomy. It is a bariatric surgery that is intended for weight loss. I am usually quite open with what is going on in my life but because of the sensitivity of this type of surgery I chose to keep it quiet until post op. So first thing: I started this process in January. It took me 6 months and 27 days to get my surgery. I had to go through extensive medical and mental testing including blood work, sleep studies, EKG, and much much more. It is a surgery I have debated for years. As much as I did this for me, I did this for Caleb and as a future nurse, my future patients. Why this surgery? I had gone in wanting the gastric bypass (the most common weight loss surgery) my surgeon recommended the sleeve. The brief story of a Vertical sleeve gastrectomy is... They remove 75-85% of my stomach completely. It has left me with a banana shaped stomach that will allow me to consume from a few ounces to start to 1/2C later on down the road. Some may feel this is the easy way out, but the surgery is easily manipulated. I have to choose everyday to wake up and follow the rules (no drinking and eating together, Protein first, veggies second and avoid slider foods which are foods that easily make it through the sleeve such as ice cream, chips and Cookies etc...) the average weight loss is 60-75% of your excess weight. An example is someone who is 100# overweight would expect to loose 60-75#. It is not uncommon to see 100% of excess weight, the sleeve essentially does the job for the first 6 months worth of loss.... I will have to remain proactive for the remainder. I made a FB page so I can keep my FB page focused on me and not annoy people daily about this. https://www.facebook.com/SleevingIt I would love for you to go like the page, but more importantly, thank you for being a part of a special event in my life."

I was totally high on narcotics at the time ha ha. I think I did pretty good though reading it now lol.

[FitnFabfor2014 358]

You did great!! Drugged up or not! Congrats to you!!!

[_oct21 6]

I had a friend, lets just say that we are no longer friends. They told me I had self esteem issues and I didnt love myself.....but anyway peoples true colors come out when you are on your way to doing better. it SCARES them!

[VSG AJH 499]

I've told very few people. At first, only my husband and best friend, and both were very supportive. Then I decided to tell a little trio of close friends over coffee. Two of the ladies were interested and asking questions, but the other was super critical and kept making comments about loose skin and how people who have WLS always gain their weight back. The crazy thing: this same lady has lost nearly 100 lbs. in four years with the lap band! She's thinner BECAUSE of WLS. She's not thin yet -- probably 75-100 lbs. overweight still -- so I think she's probably feeling threatened that she's going to lose her fat friend. Of all people, I expected support and excitement from her, but her reaction made me rethink telling anyone else.