How do you maintain your relationship when your no longer the other 1/2 of the fat happy couple?

[A_ReNUDE_me 148]

I'm pre op just looking at all situations that could possibly arise. Me & my boyfriend of 4 years have our share of issues,but nothing so serious that would make me consider leaving. We both are overweight & enjoy food...Now that I am moving forward with this surgery I am nervous about the possibility that we will not have our common link. It is my hope that my journey will encourage him to make some small changes, but do not expect him to have the surgery. This man came into my life and we connected on such a deeper level, I just worry that so much of it was based on the fact that we are both overweight. I hope this doesn't sound horrible, because I love him dearly, just wondering if it had had a negative impact on other relationships.

[DeniseM 238]

My hubby and I were huge foodies, and one of our favorite things to do was try new restaurants and new foods. Since my surgery, I have seen a change in his eating habits in that he is making better choices and eating less. I don't eat many carbs anymore, so he has stopped as well. I see him eating more salads than he ever did. I have never talked to him about this because this is my journey and he doesn't need to loose weight, but I have been surprised and happy by the changes that I see him making. So for us, my surgery has had a positive impact on his eating habits.

[UTGal99 327]

My relationship with my hubby was based on food too. We enjoyed eating out, trying new places, new foods and LOTS of it. I had surgery in October 2012 and decided this is what I needed to do to ensure my health for years to come. Fortunately for us, hubby had surgery in December 2012. We decided as a family we needed to do something and it needed to be drastic. It has worked well for us and we have adapted our lives to the new normal of enjoying other activities instead of food. And if food is involved, there is a lot less of it! Now, I'm going to give it to you straight: if your relationship is strong it will survive this surgery and adapt to the new norm for you. He will understand that this is what you had to do to get healthy and overcome the food addiction. Because honestly, I see obesity as no different than any other addiction. The only difference is you can choose not to drink and/or do drugs, you can not choose to not eat. This will help you overcome the addiction but keep in mind the sleeve is only a tool to help you get there it is not an easy fix. If he loves you and it is meant to be, your relationship will stand the test of time. If not, just remember you got to do what is right for you and the right person/relationship will follow. Take care and keep us posted!