reeluvs2sing 11 Posted September 14, 2013 Has anyone run into the problem of not being able to hang out with people you used to hang out with since surgery? I have noticed that some people (large and small) that I used to go to lunch or dinner with, seem to not want to go anymore. I need the social interaction but I am not getting it. I am speculating that they feel weird that I can't eat like I used too or maybe they feel weird because they are eating more than me? I am not sure but it makes me feel lonely. Even though I can't eat a whole lot, I still yearn to have the social interaction. Any suggestions or stories anyone would like to share with me? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JerseyGirl68 1,172 Posted September 14, 2013 I found that a few folks I knew were being overly cautious about what I "couldn't have" Once I was on solid foods, I could always find something on a menu, and always let that be what I put out there. Maybe they are just trying to be helpful. Have you tried initiating the invites to lunch? How far out are you? 1 ProudGrammy reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beach Lover 1,084 Posted September 14, 2013 I am sorry you are going through that. Do you have family that you can go out with for a nice meal? Sometimes people are just weird about the surgery and that's on them not you. I found out who my real friends were with my surgery and learned to cut a few loose. I think all of us go through this at some level. Give them a little time that might be all you need. Time will tell but I hope they come around. In the mean time are you going to a support group you might meet some new friends there who totally understand your new life. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kltklass 144 Posted September 14, 2013 Shortly after I had my sleeve, I went to lunch with a good friend. She told me she felt uncomfortable eating in front of me. I asked why... you never had a problem eating in front of me before. She explained it was because she was eating more than I was and didn't want me to be uncomfortable. I simply stated that this was my choice and she had nothing to fear. I think she was fearful that I would change and no longer want to be friends. I don't pick my friends based on their looks or food consumption. I choose people who are kind, considerate, friendly, and because we have something in common (amoung other attributes). I told her this and said you are my friend. Maybe your friends are nervous/jealous of the changes you are going through. Call them up and talk about your fears. Tell them why they are your friend and set a time to get together. We are here to support you.Good luck on your journey. 1 Montereygrl reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
reeluvs2sing 11 Posted September 14, 2013 I am almost 8 weeks out from surgery. I am up to about 800 calories a day. I can eat pretty much anything of course watching fat, sugar etc. I am just restricted of course from the surgery. I usually can find something to eat off the menu. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Camella 209 Posted September 14, 2013 How about inviting your friends to join you in a non food related activity. I have found catching up for coffee or going shopping with friends fun activities post sleeve. I haven't told anyone so it helps me in not having to answer a million questions about why I am not eating. Good luck! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ccm2n 28 Posted September 14, 2013 It will or should pass as the newness wears off. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aumum 41 Posted September 14, 2013 What about inviting them out for a coffee or a movie where there is no meal involved? It sucks that people are treating you differently, I hope you social life goes back to normal once people get used to the idea. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
