I am embarrassed

[Tiki 74]

I am really embarrassed about telling anyone about getting this surgery. Does anyone else feel the way I do?

My wish would be not to tell anyone but I am fearful my sister and my mom and even some of my close friends will be hurt if I don't tell them. Really it is painful for me to even think about telling anyone (except for my husband and he is 100% sweet and supportive).

Please Let me know how you are feeling. I need support.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Don't tell anyone you don't want to tell. I didn't. My parents, my husband and kids, my BFFs and a few of my team members. I would say less than a dozen people know and I'm good with that. It's your business, no one else's. Do what works for you.

[Miss Mac 6,262]

You know how when a woman is pregnant for the first time, and everyone she knows has a horror story about how things can go wrong or be disappointing? Well that is why I limited who I told about my upcoming surgery. I did not want to deal with unnecessary negativity during a very emotional medical event. My boyfriend is supportive, as are my daughters, but I have not told my siblings. Don't have time for the drama.

[cescelli 46]

I have been very open about it. It's my life and body. Everyone else's opinion doesn't matter. Don't be embarrassed!

[Tiki 74]

Lip and Mac

Thanks for the post. What do you say when they ask about you losing all the weight? And your new eating habits?

Oh and btw, I read you can never drink soft drinks or liquor after surgery. Is that true?

[Tiki 74]

Thanks Ces.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I simply tell people that I've gone to a doctor (truth), I'm eating high protein/low carb (truth), exercising more (truth) and that I've cut out the "bad" stuff from my diet (SO TRUE!! I cut out my tummy!).

[luckysmomma 407]

I told no one. I am so glad I have told no one. People can be mean, intentionally & unintentionally.

[gomekast 559]

You know how when a woman is pregnant for the first time' date=' and everyone she knows has a horror story about how things can go wrong or be disappointing? Well that is why I limited who I told about my upcoming surgery. I did not want to deal with unnecessary negativity during a very emotional medical event. My boyfriend is supportive, as are my daughters, but I have not told my siblings. Don't have time for the drama.[/quote']

I've only told my mom, sister, husband and 3 friends. As far as I'm concerned, it's no one else's business. It's mine and my immediate family's to know.

Not because I want to hide it, but for what she nailed above in my quote! Don't need the drama or added stress.

It's personal, and I hope you find the right answer for yourself!

[JerseyGirl68 1,172]

I am really embarrassed about telling anyone about getting this surgery. Does anyone else feel the way I do?

My wish would be not to tell anyone but I am fearful my sister and my mom and even some of my close friends will be hurt if I don't tell them. Really it is painful for me to even think about telling anyone (except for my husband and he is 100% sweet and supportive).

Please Let me know how you are feeling. I need support.

It is such a personal decision. I typically have no problem sharing details about my life. But for me, this was different. What if I failed, do I want to draw more attention to my obesity?? I told those I trusted with my feelings, that trusted my decision making abilities. I did avoid telling some family members who I felt might not be as supportive as I needed them to be. I did share with more people when I was a few weeks out, and I'm glad I did. I was very fortunate and got support from so many people. You have to do what makes you comfortable, you have your reasons. And its not for anyone to judge you.

Good luck!

[BellaItaliana 57]

I told my mom (she went with me for the surgery), my sister, and my closest friend... only because I knew she would be very suspicious about my eating/drinking changes. I don't plan on telling anyone else. As far as what do I tell other people? I tell them I am doing high protein/low carb, and exercising. Also, if I am at a BBQ or something (which has happened recently) and there's nothing for me to eat, I tell them I'm on a diet and I had a Protein Shake right before I got there. It's usually true. As far as alcohol, I have used Migraines as my excuse for not drinking lately.

My feeling is that it is nobody's business but mine, and I don't want to be known from here on out as the "girl who had weight loss surgery" in my extended group of friends. I believe it's a totally personal decision if you want to tell people or not. I decided not to tell, and although it's only been a month, it's working out fine so far.

[offigo 6]

I have told just the ones that need to know. A few friends and some family. I guess I am a little embarrassed but mostly I feel that most people are ignorant about the surgery. They make judgments and I don't want the negativity. It bothers me that so many think this is the easy way out, I haven't even had mine yet and it has been really hard already. It is bothering me that I have to lie to some family and friends and say I am having Gallbladder surgery but it should be about me, not anyone else’s feelings.

[Macy6 356]

Your body.... your choice! You should NOT be embarrassed! I personally chose to tell very few (Best friends, parents, child) until insurance approval, once I had insurance approval I opened that circle a little wider (family, friends, school.... those who would be effected by my surgery or hurt that I didn't tell them) the day of surgery, high on morphine, laid up in the hospital, 4 hours after surgery... I came clean TO EVERYONE... I had created a Face Book page that I had posted many many notes on, the notes included everything from who my surgeon is, his education, every question I asked him, every book and website I had been on, what the surgery entails, and what brought me to bariatric surgery. So when I came clean I asked everyone to join that page, if they chose too, so I don't have to overwhelm my FB page with weight loss stuff if they aren't interested. I can not tell you the positive reactions I have received.... amazing amazing people I have in my life. Positive words of encouragement, I even found out a friend had bariatric surgery years ago and I had no clue. Is it meant for everyone? no, but I don't regret it. It took a lot, but you know what I needed to put myself out there. I have to hold myself accountable and I need to do this, this is it.... my chance to take my life over!

[Cupcake 801]

I think its no ones business, if you do not feel like sharing your personal business then dont, it is your own business no one else. I have not told my coworkers because honestly its none of their business and I do not discuss personal issues. The only people that know is my husband, , parents and kids. Just remember you do not owe anyone an explanation.

[cejiogu 182]

I didn't tell anyone to start only my sister because she came to help me for a week after. I now am op en about it with people at work and family. I have inspired 2 girls that I work with to have some type of procedure. I am behind them 100 percent. After you have the surgery and start losing weight you may feel different. I tell people that I could have lost the weight but I would have gained it back. While I know you can gain weight even if you have a sleeve you have to work really hard at it! The chances of me doing it are very slim now (haha) I have lost 85 pounds since may. I am not looking back!