I am embarrassed

[princessme 6]

I am really embarrassed about telling anyone about getting this surgery. Does anyone else feel the way I do?

My wish would be not to tell anyone but I am fearful my sister and my mom and even some of my close friends will be hurt if I don't tell them. Really it is painful for me to even think about telling anyone (except for my husband and he is 100% sweet and supportive).

Please Let me know how you are feeling. I need support.

Tiki I TOLD NO ONE!

[Chelsi 107]

my husband, immediate family, in-laws, a few close friends, and my coworkers (i work in a group home, there's only a handful of us) are the only people i've told. afterwards, i don't care who finds out that i had it done, but i just didn't want to deal with the crap anyone has to say beforehand. i don't need to be second guessing a decision i know is going to be worth it because of something stupid someone that doesn't matter might say. go with your instincts! good luck!

[Roo101769 742]

You must do what makes you feel safe and comfortable. But do not feel shame for making the decision to live your life. You may be saving your life, you may be changing your body to be able to live the life you dream about. Whatever the reason that has lead you here, be proud that you are a strong enough person to get it. There is such a social stigma about being overweight. I have said time and again it is the last overwhelmingly acceptable form of bigotry left. In a country where the majority of the population is overweight or obese, most still feel it is ok to be negative to others who are struggling with their body size. But the few of us who come to terms with the fact we need help getting past this, we can be made to feel inferior for it. I actually find that very ironic when you realize just how huge the diet industry is. Most everybody is trying to drop weight at some point or another, yet people who seek a surgical option are wrong???? Crazy. I personally have been very open. I am not ashamed. I don't really care if people react negatively because this is for ME, not them. I will say I haven't had anyone really be against it. Most realize a thinner me will be a healthier me and support me in my journey.

[Lenac0001 4]

I feel for you. Other than my husband and few close family members, I have chosen not tell anyone about my plan for WLS. I don't know if it is embarrassment or the fact that I am not sure how to discuss it. I have found in the past that even some family members were not open with my thought of WLS when I have brought it up. A lot of times there are questions they have that I just don't feel comfortable discussing. I think that if you decide not to tell anyone, then that is ok. Its your journey and you need to feel comfortable on it. I wish you the best of luck!! <3 Vel

[FitnFabfor2014 358]

I am still going through all the pre-op (I have a six month WLS waiting period). I have chosen to tell NO-one until I am approved. Even at that point I will only tell my Son and Mother. It's nobody's business but mine.

[Nurse_B 270]

I started out only telling my immediate family. Slowly I told close friends, and then some co-workers. I will tell no one else, simply because I don't want their opinions on my decision. I'm sure people will speculate once I start losing, but they can guess all they want. I've had only one person react negatively, and that was a close friend. She thought I was taking the easy way out. I explained to her how painful and tough this is for me, I first felt like I was a failure and embarrassed for doing the surgery. Now, in large part to this site, I feel empowered and in charge of my health for the first time. I'm proud I can admit when I need help from others and am willing to do the hard work. Long story short, those who matter to you should support and uplift you, everyone else doesn't matter. This decision is so personal, you have every right to tell or not. Good luck to you, and congratulations for putting your health as a priority in your life!

[Wags 549]

I tell people that I am on a diet - high protein/low carb. That's the truth.

The only thing the sleeve does for me is limit portion size - so I am doing all the work. I still have to make good choices.

And that's the truth.

[keglenne 23]

Hi im new here. I love reading all of the interesting posts and different opinions of the postees shall i say. I just want to make a comment regarding telling anyone about your decision to have surgery. Personally i dont care what others think because simply im the only person that can walk in my shoes. Im the one dealing with this battle. At the end of the day you will be the deciding factor on how your life will be and also going through such a life changing event can serve as a testimony to help someone else. We are all different so for those that choose not to share your moment of change its ok because you are incharge of this moment and being discreet about it may lead to you being more sucessful in the long run. Remember the way you think mentally has alot to do with you being sucessful so whatever you decide to do tell or keep this experience to yourself is your right and you should not be judged based on that. Much success and God bless.

[Mollz 18]

My mom, dad, and an aunt are the only people I've told.

My two siblings probably won't know until after I've had surgery. My mom is HIGHLY upset at that thought, but it's not about her, or them. It's about me.

[keglenne 23]

It is about you thats exactly how i feel way to go

[becky2013 11]

I'll tell whoever ask. Once I told Mom and Dad they were spreading the news. Lol you gonna get neg. and positive feed back. My body my decision I don't want the stress of hiding this from anybody because I know they will find out sooner or later, rather deal with it now. But I can truly say I've had almost all good support. Start my new life tomorrow morning @ 7:00. Best of luck to everybody in whatever decision you make.

[ccm2n 28]

I didn't tell any one other than my fiancé. I mentioned it to them that I was thinking about it but didn't tell. Its a personal choice. I have had to semi lie. I did have a hernia in my upper left abdominal wall and did need repair , but a barratric / surgeon at Vanderbilt did it while he removed 80% of my stomach. The classic 2 for 1.

[GoldyGirl 186]

I am 9 months out only Told my husband and best friend before surgery, have told one other friend after. I do not regret my decision at all. I need POSITIVE in my life and if I did not think ppl would be positive I did not share it is not their business.....I am made friends on here and WLS support groups to talk about the surgery with. and Happy with my decision....

[Seela 1,187]

I personally think its more embarrassing when I can't fit into a booth a a restaurant or have to wait for a hallway to clear before I can go through! I simply explain that this surgery extends life by an average of 10 years per person. If someone is still snotty I congratulate them on having such a perfect life