GatorGirl72 29 Posted September 5, 2013 I have been trying to get approved for weight loss surgery for quite some time. Now that I have a firm surgery date for 2 weeks away, I'm freaking out! I find myself crying and full of anxiety, but yet I KNOW I made the right decision. I guess I'm nervous about being the fact that I have hid behind the fat girl persona and jokes for the last 14 years and now I'm not going to be that girl. I promise, I am a very stable individual and have confidence in my future. But for now, I just might need a xanax...lol! Anybody else go through this? 5 Sonia Singh, Lunaya, RAAinNH and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sonia Singh 25 Posted September 5, 2013 You will be very happy with the decision. I am also in a FB group and it is very supportive. Women only. Let me know if you would like to join. It is a private group. Easy navigation and progress photos. It helps through the journey as well as this site. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
livelyterry 55 Posted September 5, 2013 Xanax good....lol I think it's normal to be anxious. It's going to be a huge life change. I'm feeling the same...surgery in 3 weeks. The think that hit me last night was that it was "permanent" . I've had my lap band for years, and although it didn't work for me, it was in the back of my mind that I could always take it out. This is different. So yes, I'm sure that is in the back of your mind too. Talk to your doc about some anti-anxiety meds if you need it. Better living through chemical means, ha! Check to see if there are some local groups you can meet with. Maybe find someone to make friends with and talk to. T Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GatorGirl72 29 Posted September 5, 2013 Thanks y'all! Sadly, I live in a small town (going 2 hrs away for surgery) so there are very few I can talk with locally. I just started becoming active in the VSG community so i look fwd to sharing and caring with you all Sonia, I would love to join the FB group, my email is alabasterbox772@cox.net. I think you're right Terry, this kind of feels like a grieving process of sorts. I know everything will be okay, but for the next 2 weeks I need to remain focused on the end goal! Thank goodness my PC doc knows me and wrote me a decent rx for anxiety meds....guess it's time to pull them out 2 Lunaya and francie348 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CowgirlJane 14,260 Posted September 5, 2013 I think a little fear is healthy. this is a HUGE change and anybody who goes into it all "la dee da" is going to have a very rude awakening. It has been an amazingly positive thing for me, but i had a defective stomach and that damn thing needed to be reduced...LOL! When people name their sleeves and stuff like that, i don't relate to it. I still have a stomach, it is just better suited to my actual eating needs now. It used to be the stomach that 6'6" football player should have! 4 GatorGirl72, kbg29520, francie348 and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kbg29520 18 Posted September 8, 2013 You will be very happy with the decision. I am also in a FB group and it is very supportive. Women only. Let me know if you would like to join. It is a private group. Easy navigation and progress photos. It helps through the journey as well as this site. I think a little fear is healthy. this is a HUGE change and anybody who goes into it all "la dee da" is going to have a very rude awakening. It has been an amazingly positive thing for me' date=' but i had a defective stomach and that damn thing needed to be reduced...LOL! When people name their sleeves and stuff like that, i don't relate to it. I still have a stomach, it is just better suited to my actual eating needs now. It used to be the stomach that 6'6" football player should have![/quote'] I think you're right on Cowgirl Jane. I was sooooo excited about the possibility of having surgery and being able to FINALLY just be myself without lugging around a lot of physical and emotional baggage! But the closer I got to my surgery date the more I started to doubt my ability to make this journey successful. I LOVED food! I was addicted wholeheartedly! I had given up cigarettes three years ago, and let me tell you it was the hardest thing I had ever done. But that gave me hope that I could do this too. Hope......but not confidence. This is a serious surgery and you will be forever changed. You cannot just undo it if you change your mind. Now 4 weeks out from surgery I AM making it happen. I lost 20 lbs preop and 18 since surgery. I struggled because I have compared my weight loss to others. There's only one me and if it takes me longer to lose the weight so be it! I am not naming my sleeve, baby-talking to my sleeve, or discussing what it likes or dislikes as if it were my child. I don't want a relationship with it! It serves a purpose for me and that's it! If I had thought this way about me stomach before maybe I wouldn't be in the shape I am now! It's a tool that I am extremely thankful for, but I want a relationship with life. I want to enjoy every little moment I can squeeze out of this life I have been given! I want to do things I never thought possible........and I will! I hope each of you will do the same! 2 francie348 and GatorGirl72 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
francie348 7 Posted September 8, 2013 I can totally relate to you gatorgirl! And two months out I am SO glad I did this. I too see others losing faster but know I'm in this for the long haul and however long it takes...as long as I am still losing steady I'm good with it. Are there days I miss some of my pre-op ways, yes, but I wouldn't change anything and those pre-op habits and ways robbed me of a good quality of life for 30 years. I'm starting to get that back and am enjoying my life again. food no longer controls me! That's such a great feeling! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sohio44811 17 Posted September 8, 2013 I think a little fear is healthy. this is a HUGE change and anybody who goes into it all "la dee da" is going to have a very rude awakening. It has been an amazingly positive thing for me' date=' but i had a defective stomach and that damn thing needed to be reduced...LOL! When people name their sleeves and stuff like that, i don't relate to it. I still have a stomach, it is just better suited to my actual eating needs now. It used to be the stomach that 6'6" football player should have![/quote'] Love this and I feel the exact same way!!! 1 francie348 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kayjunqueen 3 Posted September 20, 2013 I am 20 days out, and vacillate between super excited and mortified every day. I give myself pep talks. I shop for smaller clothes and saddles and knee-high boots. I think about being healthy into old age. I think about living. Combined, these things help me push past fear... well, that and a little Zoloft. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PrettyLilButterfly 124 Posted September 20, 2013 Each day is a different emotion for me.. Most days I look in the mirror and say "OMG I"M HERE!! THE REAL ME IS HERE!!". And some days I'm "wtf did i do...this is forever". Then I watch walking dead and think "hmm I can survive a zombie attack, I don't need to eat as much as others".. The things I find to get myself through it! We've spent most of our lives overweight..we adjusted to it, accepted it...we didn't think there was any other way. So we got used to not fitting on the airplane, riding rides at 6 flags, being the biggest person in the room.... And NOW, we have to adjust to being some hot sexy people, being just a person in the crowd, fitting on the airplanes WITH extra room, and loving the NEW us. It's an adjustment, but one I do not regret. Take it one day at a time sweetie. Live fully for today..and be happy with your decision! Your health with thank you! 4 Nurse_B, SuperFab, Eyedbrown and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites