A psychological blow

[Josette 2]

Hello Want,

My name is Josette and I'm 31 from Michigan. I got the band on August 3rd, 06. I can really relate to what you're feeling. I went to a seminar in Feb and chose that doctor to do my surgery. I went then set up the consultation and the day before I found out about several out of pocket fee's that would be due prior to surgery that I couldn't afford. I was very unhappy with that but decided to go search out other surgeons in my state and find out my other options. I then set up another seminar for a lap band center 2 hours away but had to wait a month. I went to that seminar and fell in love with the doctor. I knew he was the one for me. I set up the consultation and the day of the consult I was an hour from the hospital and got a call they had to reschedule... this set into motion the whole "maybe I shouldn't be doing this. maybe this is a sign.. this process keeps getting delayed!" so I rescheduled and two weeks later went and all went well. Met with the dietician, had a sleep study... got my surgery date for a month later. I requested two days off from work and then my boss called me in to tell me that he had to renig on the days off and i couldn't have them anymore. again the "maybe I shouldn't be doing this" thoughts came back. Then the doctor had to cancel the date because of a conflict... again the thoughts.... But... I knew that I really really wanted this and needed it more then that. So I stuck to it and got rescheduled again and after that everything went fine and I finally had the surgery and I don't regret it for a second. I love my band and I don't miss the 36 pounds I've lost! You'll do great and don't worry. Everything happens for a reason and you'll have your surgery and be on your way to a thin and happy life!

Now if only I could talk my husband into getting the surgery! tee hee!

Good luck and keep us updated!!

[zevesther 0]

I know exactly what you're talking about. i was just operated on last week 1/9/07. I was laying on the table pre-op and saying, "I gotta get out of here! What the heck do I need this for?" Well, I toughed it out, and I'm happy that I did. So far the recovery has'nt been too bad, and in ten days I lost 15 lbs. There is already a difference in my blood pressure and joints. Keep the faith!

[CCBSTX 0]

NORMAL! I think we all have had our doubts. Some more than others. That must have been totally frustrating to muster enough strength to go to the hospital, get prepped, and no surgery. Ugh!

Shawn

[WantTheBand 0]

Thank you all again for your kind words of inspiration and pure honesty. Tomorrow is my big day and although I'm nervous, it feels different this time. Having seen the video of the actual procedure helped comfort me. It really is a very simple surgery, or as simple as internal surgery can be. I have printed out your words of encouragement and will take with me tomorrow. I know this is the right choice, and I know that I would have these feelings of nervousness no matter what the actual procedure was. It's normal.

When I look at what Neal has accomplished (ousooner), it inspires me. Probably because our build and weight are (were) so similar. To see the steady progress he's made on his website makes me realize what can happen. I can't wait. Thanks.

I'll keep you all updated.

Jeff

[Mommy202 0]

Good luck tomorrow and God Bless you and watch over you during your surgery.

[ousooner 1]

Jeff, good luck. You will do great! Keep us posted when you get home.

[beckamarie 0]

Jeff I hope you are recovering well

[WantTheBand 0]

Hi Everyone. I'm banded!:clap2:

What a ride. Again, I have this fear of surgery in general so the thoughts of 'running' were going through my head as they prepped me. Prep was done at 12:15 and my surgery was scheduled for 1:30. Talk about every minute ticking by like an hour. Then at 12:35 my surgeon came to see how I was doing and to let me know that everything would be fine. I think he saw the terror in my eyes so he said that if I was ready, he was ready! 10 minutes later they inject the 'sleepy meds' into my IV, I kiss my wife, they wheel me into the next room and that was it. Nighty night. The next thing I know I was in the recovery room, extremely groggy, and being told that everything went excellent. 20 minutes later they wheel me into the hall to re-join my wife and in-laws, and then we went to my room.

I had no pain meds the first night because I once had a horrible reaction to Vicodin. However the next day I gave in to something a little lighter than Vicodin due to the soreness of the incisions and also the discomfort in my abdomen. I was clear to leave the hospital at 8:30am this morning, but I stayed until 3 because I didnt feel up to the ride home.

Right now I'm making my first puree'd meal so we'll see how that goes. Thanks again for all your support!

[bosteph 2]

Congratulations!!!:clap2: :clap2: :clap2:

Like you, I thought that fear of surgery was my main concern. What I have determined since the surgery is that was not my biggest fear at all.

My biggest fear through all of this is failure.

I have been a complete failure at keeping lost weight off for most of my adult life. Every time that I try and don't succeed just adds another shovel-full on my mountain of failure. Pretty soon that baby is so big that you'd have to be a good mountain climber to even take a chance on trying.

Thus begins the cycle of "I just have to accept myself as I am" until I can't stand it anymore. I go on a diet then brace myself for the inevitable failure. I just didn't want to go through a surgery, get my hopes up, have everyone know about it and then be humilated when the inevitable failure arrived.

What I know now is this...

I can do this. I am doing it. I will do this. I can feel that this is different than anything that I could have expected. I am active. I am positive. It's only been 6 weeks but on a diet I would have already derailed.

You can do it too. I just know it.

Follow the guidelines that your doctor gives you and you will do great. Good luck and a speedy recovery.

P.S. - my husband will be banded next Thursday :biggrin1:

[beckamarie 0]

[Betsyjane 2]

Congratulations, dear. Get ready for the roller coaster ride to continue as you learn about this new and wonderful life.... You'll figure what to do about shoulder pain, exercise, liquids, mushies solid foods, fills that don't work, more fills that do.... You've stood up to your fears. Now get ready to stand up to your new life and cheer. It's quite a journey! And we'll all get through it together.

[Success in lapband 0]

Jeff ~~~~congrats!

I also am frightened of "going under". I think I am going to try and take my laptop so I can stay very "centered" on this website until my number is called.

Did they offer you any nerve meds until they gave you the sleepy meds?

I think I am going to make my Dr. promise to wake me up ASAP to tell me everything is okay. Did you sleep for the rest of the day after surgery, how groggy were you?

[WantTheBand 0]

Jeff ~~~~congrats!

I also am frightened of "going under". I think I am going to try and take my laptop so I can stay very "centered" on this website until my number is called.

I hated the thought of being put to sleep, but it all happened so fast that I didnt have time to worry about once they were ready to go. Laptop=Not a bad idea if you will have someone there to take it from you when your time comes. Or you could do like I did and print out inspirational posts and read them at that time!

Did they offer you any nerve meds until they gave you the sleepy meds?

I think I am going to make my Dr. promise to wake me up ASAP to tell me everything is okay. Did you sleep for the rest of the day after surgery, how groggy were you?

I heard somewhere that they could give you something to calm down, but I was more than willing to just get the whole thing over with. I was sooo happy to be alive afterwards that I didnt sleep much. I only got 3 hours of sleep last night (after surgery) and was wide awake all day today until about 2pm, then I got tired. After getting home I took about a 2 hour nap and I am ready for bed anytime now.

[Wheetsin 714]

I also am frightened of "going under". I think I am going to try and take my laptop so I can stay very "centered" on this website until my number is called.

I can relate! My band was my first surgery, and the two things I was most afraid of were the IV and the actual sedation.

The IV was a piece of cake. They gave me a lidocaine shot first, then placed it, but there were so many things going on and I was so overwhelmed that I really didn't even notice.

I was nervous in the prep area, and my pulse was skyrocketing. They injected something into my IV that made me very calm. Still very aware, but very relaxed. Very mmmmeeellllllloooowww. I was having a conversation with my husband, but... well, you know how when you're really tired - so tired you can't fall asleep, and someone tries to talk to you and you're responding but you can hear that you're doing it veeeerrrrryyyy ssssllllooooowwwllllyyy? That's exactly what it was like.

It wore off after a while, so I asked them for some more. They called it "Happy Juice".

Now - I remember then coming to get me. And I remember bits and pieces of the trip to the OR, but not the whole trip. I remember making a comment about "that was really nice of someone to leave you enough room to get by" (because the hallway was lined with wheelchairs, gurneys, etc. and it was a tight fit... and something about the medicine they gave me made me very... I don't know... mean, in a way.)

I remember being pushed into the OR and seeing a lady standing by a tray. And the anesthesiologist telling me to get on the table, and then he and the assistant were arguing -- I was too tall for how the table was set up and they were debating what to adjust. And I remember them putting something on my legs, and I remember the anesthesiologist putting the mask on my face and saying, "I'm just going to give you some air." And I remember thinking, "When he switches the air to gas, I'll never fall asleep, what a fool..." (because the mask wasn't sealed, it was a little crooked and there was a big gap on one side.. I remember thinking all the gas would just go out that side). I can pretty much remember everything from right outside the OR until the moment I thought they'd never get me to sleep... and I don't remember squat after, until recovery.

And the next thing I knew someone was asking me to lift my butt so they could get an xray film under me, and there were people buzzing around me doing different things.

I'm guessing the "bits and pieces" recall was due to the amnesiac effect. But then it's weird that there are some things I remember with 100% clarity.

Before my surgery, what was freaking me out the most about going under was -- ok, everyone told me "you won't remember it"... but whether or not I remember it wasn't the point. If I experienced something horrible (I was so afraid they'd remove the breathing tube after I was awake), It's little consolation that I won't remember it, because I still have to experience it, and at least at that moment I'm completely aware of what's going on.

One of the first things I did in recovery was to reach up and feel if the breathing tube had been removed or not.

[Success in lapband 0]

Want the Band;

You said it perfectly! You were so glad to be alive!! Exactly my point....That is what I am afraid of, and now that the day is almost 2 weeks aways WOW, I was not concerned until yesterday.

I was so proud of myself for NOT being a chicken. I have passed up many needed surgery and toughed out the bumpy road (not taking the surgery) and suffering the consequences because of not wanting to go under, and up until now I have been "brave".

I think I will print out the inspirational impactful things I read on here just like you did. I remember you mentioning that you were going to do that and I thought it was a fabulous idea.