How do you handle attention from the opposite sex now that you've been sleeved and are SUPER HOT?

[gaye jarvis 751]

After losing 133 lbs I definitely get looks from guys that never would have looked at me before even if my head was on fire! I have been married to the most amazing man in the whole world for 33 years and would never do anything to screw that up, but I'm a woman who has been fat all my life and never knew what it felt like for guys to check me out, it feels darn good and my husband knows that he's the only man for me!

Sent from Gaye's iPad Mini using VST

[buplee 556]

True my husband always thought I was pretty hot..

I do FEEL more "hot" these days I will say that.

And that probably has a bit to do with the extra attention (as does the 76 pounds I'm sure)

My thoughts? I really don't put to much stock in strangers trying to pick up on me. But I like feeling my own sexiness..

Somedays I get up dressed and out and drive around in my own feeling hot show' date=' just running errands. I'm might be the only one tuned in and watching Laura's hot sexy outing but it feels good anyway.

So my question to you is how do you feel about yourself without the outside influences?

Maybe just a little hot? Here and there?

[/quote']

I have lost 88lbs since being sleeved but I wouldn't be able to tell if were not for the size of the clothes I buy. My wife tells me how hot I look. However, I just say thank you and smile but don't feel it myself. I always thought of myself as smart and successful but never hot. I used to hear comments from people saying that my wife must have married me for money. Which couldn't be further from the truth since the two of us made 32K combined when we started dating and got married. I hope to feel hot some day but now it still seems so foreign to me.

[buplee 556]

I have lost 88lbs since being sleeved but I wouldn't be able to tell if were not for the size of the clothes I buy. My wife tells me how hot I look. However' date=' I just say thank you and smile but don't feel it myself. I always thought of myself as smart and successful but never hot. I used to hear comments from people saying that my wife must have married me for money. Which couldn't be further from the truth since the two of us made 32K combined when we started dating and got married. I hope to feel hot some day but now it still seems so foreign to me.[/quote']

Footnote- we have built a great life together for our family and have been together for almost 30 years. I'm sure people who just met us pre-sleeve thought that because they saw the material signs of success but not that what we have is true love. Why else would someone who looks like my wife stay married to someone who hovered between 240-300lbs stick around. So when someone see her baubles and toys, I say she earned them.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Footnote- we have built a great life together for our family and have been together for almost 30 years. I'm sure people who just met us pre-sleeve thought that because they saw the material signs of success but not that what we have is true love. Why else would someone who looks like my wife stay married to someone who hovered between 240-300lbs stick around. So when someone see her baubles and toys' date=' I say she earned them.[/quote']

I felt the same way. When we met, My wife was running marathons and had a PhD. I was 400lbs and driving a truck. What she saw in me I have no clue.... Neither did anyone else. Her family freaked.

[zenandnow 514]

Some of us see past the material things, and even the physical, to the person inside. Brains, sense of humor, similar morals - that's the important stuff. The rest is transient 'gravy'.

[buplee 556]

I felt the same way. When we met' date=' My wife was running marathons and had a PhD. I was 400lbs and driving a truck. What she saw in me I have no clue.... Neither did anyone else. Her family freaked.[/quote']

So did her family. Even though we both grew up poor and I had potential, her mother hated me. Her mother and cousin told us at our wedding reception, that our marriage wouldn't last 2 years before she would cheat and leave me for someone better looking. Boy were the wrong. My wife and I are no longer poor, have traveled the world, and have a few obvious signs of success (cars, homes, etc), and her mother and cousin have never set foot or but in any of them. Which is fine with us.

[buplee 556]

Some of us see past the material things' date=' and even the physical, to the person inside. Brains, sense of humor, similar morals - that's the important stuff. The rest is transient 'gravy'.[/quote']

My wife was one of those who did and I am grateful to still call her my bride. Good luck to you.

[No game 14,437]

Footnote- we have built a great life together for our family and have been together for almost 30 years. I'm sure people who just met us pre-sleeve thought that because they saw the material signs of success but not that what we have is true love. Why else would someone who looks like my wife stay married to someone who hovered between 240-300lbs stick around. So when someone see her baubles and toys' date=' I say she earned them.[/quote']

You know, some people may have thought these things.. Just like some jackasses said things like "she must of married for the money"

But at the end of the day, what do these people matter? That's why I say I don't care very much if I'm perceived as hot or not by others. At the end of the day it's about what I feel about myself.

Don't let these past comments influence how you feel now. You are loved and you love this is the most important thing there is in life.

Hot? It's fleeting and smoke and mirrors most of the time.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

I'm flattered. I smile, thank them for the compliment, and tell them I'm happily married!! I don't care if those who find me attractive now would find me attractive before at almost 300 pounds. Truth is, probably not. I didn't find myself too attractive then either! I think I'm more approachable now because I have confidence, am outgoing, and extremely happy!!! I don't get insulted or over analyze their intentions, unless they are rude of course!

[buplee 556]

You know' date=' some people may have thought these things.. Just like some jackasses said thing like she must of married for the money....

But at the end of the day, what do these people matter? That's why I say I don't care very much if I'm perceived as hot or not by others. At the end of the day it's about what I feel about myself.

Don't let these past comments influence how you feel now. You are loved and you love this is the most important thing there is in life.

Hot? It's fleeting and smoke and mirrors most of the time.

[/quote']

Very true. People and their stupid comments mean nothing to me. I could not have gotten to where I am in life by being thin skinned. However, it would be nice to feel hot at least once in my life in my own mind. We came in a little while ago from a party and my wife told me she saw women checking me out. I smiled as I usually do, and she said "I'm serious they were".

I glad you go out sometimes to enjoy your hotness. Keep it up and good for you.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Very true. People and their stupid comments mean nothing to me. I could not have gotten to where I am in life by being thin skinned. However' date=' it would be nice to feel hot at least once in my life in my own mind. We came in a little while ago from a party and my wife told me she saw women checking me out. I smiled as I usually do, and she said "I'm serious they were".

I glad you go out sometimes to enjoy your hotness. Keep it up and good for you.[/quote']

Your self image will lag behind your physical transformation. You'll know it's happening when you catch a reflection in the mirror one day and ask "who is that skinny person?" Only to realize it's you. Most of us go through that. Eventually your mind will catch up to your body and you'll realize how far you've come.

[No game 14,437]

Very true. People and their stupid comments mean nothing to me. I could not have gotten to where I am in life by being thin skinned. However' date=' it would be nice to feel hot at least once in my life in my own mind. We came in a little while ago from a party and my wife told me she saw women checking me out. I smiled as I usually do, and she said "I'm serious they were".

I glad you go out sometimes to enjoy your hotness. Keep it up and good for you.[/quote']

It's taken me a lot of years to overcome self loathing and I must say its not easy everyday..

My own father used to call (divorced) once in awhile and would ask if I was "still fat".

I used to live across the street from my office when I was younger. So I walked to work.

When I was in the crosswalk sometimes I was whistled at or barked at or talked rude too.

I never understood why people felt compelled to rate me.

That's why I feel good and yes sometimes hot but only for myself or my husband, who loves me anyway he can get me.

Try it sometime let the negatives go and feel good. Feel good for yourself and your wife!

[buplee 556]

I'll try that. I am taking baby steps trying to get used to the emerging me. I can't understand how I can do so well professionally and yet be so critical of myself. My wife and I have a trip booked for later this year to the Caribbean, maybe I'll be a bit more comfortable by then. It will be our first trip to a beach in 28 years, and I owe it to her.

[buplee 556]

Your self image will lag behind your physical transformation. You'll know it's happening when you catch a reflection in the mirror one day and ask "who is that skinny person?" Only to realize it's you. Most of us go through that. Eventually your mind will catch up to your body and you'll realize how far you've come.

I can't wait for that day and relish the thought.

[zenandnow 514]

I'll try that. I am taking baby steps trying to get used to the emerging me. I can't understand how I can do so well professionally and yet be so critical of myself. My wife and I have a trip booked for later this year to the Caribbean' date=' maybe I'll be a bit more comfortable by then. It will be our first trip to a beach in 28 years, and I owe it to her.[/quote']

That is awesome, I hope you are able to truly enjoy it, and yourself!