Weight regain & non-supportive family members

[Texas Belle 1]

Howdy,

It deeply shames me to admit this, but I do have weight regain. I've noticed the moment I get extremely stressed out or extremely upset or both that all I want to do is simply just eat. I hate this.

I've had my VSG on July 18th, 2012. My original weight was 330lbs before the surgery. I've lost 142lbs as result of the surgery. My current weight bounces between 182 to 195lbs based on my eating.

It has been fairly easy up until this point. I will admit that I am miserable. I am at a point in my life that I wish I was not in, but unfortunately, I am in it. At this point: No steady job with benefits, still in college, left my lying boyfriend, and I don't really have any close friends anymore, because I moved back in with my parents due to economic difficulties.

As result of my age (being 26), I was kicked off the extremely good health insurance that my family has. The other downside of being a VSG, not many insurance companies like to offer decent health insurance to you as result of being a VSG. My current insurance is Coordinated Health Benefits. For the record, they are *awful*. I do not recommend them. You are always billed later for any office visits, blood work, and you pay obscene prices for medications.

I have explained to my parents that I am struggling to lose this remaining weight. All I am met with are comments of severe negativity and shame. Not support and encouragement. My parents are *NOT* supportive of me in the sense of encouragement and wanting to see me be successful as a VSG. They are not willing to be helpful at all. All they wish to do is tempt me with more junk food. They are of the personality, "It's OK for us to eat whatever we want and be fat, but it is not OK for you to be fat. Yet we are not willing to help you by changing our eating habits since we all live in the same house."

I don't know what to do. I don't have anyone in my life who I can talk to about this. I can't afford to talk to someone who is a mental health provider, because I do not have a steady full-time job with benefits. I am in the process of wrapping up my Bachelors' degree in Legal Studies and Business Management. I am currently looking for a job that suits my skill set.

I feel like I just do not have any hope. I wish I did have hope. I pray to God everyday to please bring me some hope. That's all I want is something good to believe in.

I don't want to be my starting weight again, but I know if I continue on this destructive path that I will be...

- Texas Belle

[Takingcontrol 467]

WOW! You've lost 142 lbs in a month?? That unbelievable! It sounds like you are doing amazing! It's OK to slip a little...just put it behind you & keep going!!

[Texas Belle 1]

No. It was over the course of a year. I wrote the date wrong. It is actually July 18th, 2012.

[READY4CHANGE2013 88]

1st let me ask..who did you do this surgery for? You or everyone esle?? If you don't set in your mind that you will be SUCCESSFUL you will always FAIL!! Instead of eating try going for a walk or reading a book...NO ONE is forcing you to put food into your mouth...it's a choice that you have made. I'm not yelling at you or coming down on you..I'm just being real. I too have that issue and this is what I've chosen to do to AVOID regaining. GOOD LUCK!! You have a friend in me if you just want to SCREAM!!

[Texas Belle 1]

I don't feel amazing. I actually don't feel much of anything. I am slammed with so much shame and negativity.

[NMJG 1,266]

Honey, moving back home is a bad step. I bet if you change your environment for the better, the weight will come off again. First, stop expecting help from your parents. It sounds like they've pretty much shown you none is coming from that direction. Move on emotionally and that will help you while you are living at home. Second, spend as little time at home as possible. Just sleep and bathe there. Never eat there, take your food with you to school. Get a cooler for your car. You can do this. You've come this far, and you can finish the journey and stay healthy. Good luck and prayers for you.

[SREMMMOM 16]

Girl, you've got to pull yourself together. You have done an amazing job over the course of this past year. YOU have done that, no one else did that for you. YOU made the choice. We all have **** going on in our lives, but you have to decide for yourself that you are worth it, and you are worth it! Go back to basics. Get in your exercise. Don't let your family sabotage your efforts - YOU ARE TOTALLY WORTH IT!

[Mandagirl 11]

I am very early in this process, but I found myself to be snacky at times and the scale was not moving. I started logging everything in my fitness pal and the weight is coming off. I didn't want to have to journal food for the rest of my life, but I will probably have to. This is a tool, Portion Control, it will work wonderfully if I will stay away from the grazing and high calorie junk. So logging my food is part of my lifestyle change that will keep me from being 294 again. I am a mental health professional and there may be some services available of which you are unaware...Your college might have a counseling program where you can go for free as long as you are a student. It is worth looking into. Your community mental health center might have a sliding fee scale which discounts the rate you pay based on your income. Those are a couple of options if you are looking for professional mental health services. Admitting to the problem is the first step. You already know what it takes to be successful. You have done it before and you can do it again. I wish you the best and I look forward to reading about your progress.

[Catherine707 253]

I think you have been amazingly successful! First a huge weight loss, while staying in school and preparing for a better life / long term career puts you in the "winner!" column. Yes, you are living in bad situation, and you are missing having supportive people around you, and that can feel overwhelming at times. Be glad that you are past the bad relationship, and that you have a bright future ahead of you. Your feelings are temporary and your other challenges can be fixed! Hang in there, finish your degree and the world will be yours for the taking! You might check into counseling services at your school. Most schools have people available to assist with the emotional bumps in the road!

[jandseakin 96]

I wish you could see yourself as we here see you! You have lost 142 pounds!!! OMG! You have tremendous pressures right now but you have managed to stay below 200!!! OMG! You are about to get a degree and be very employable and insurable!!! OMG! Please hang in there and in a very short time you will be back on your own with a terrific new job, a new life, major self-esteem ...and all this at only 26 and in spite of your negative family. You have your whole life ahead of you and it can be fabulous!

I agree with the other post's advice to spend as little time as possible at home, prepare your own food, live your own life... the life you chose when you chose VSG.

Also, check with bariatric surgical centers in your area. Mine has monthly support groups (free) and they are open to everyone, even if you had surgery elsewhere.

Best of luck to you. Please let us know how you are doing. You can do this!!!!

[tinahall 27]

Girl, you have done amazing so far and when I read this my heart breaks for you, but you are strong and you need to pick yourself up, pat yourself on the back and move forward. You're healthy and only get one shot in this life time so make it the best!! You can make the right choices and please get out on your own when the opportunity presents itself.

Sent from my iPhone using VST

[keke 60]

Howdy' date='

It deeply shames me to admit this, but I do have weight regain. I've noticed the moment I get extremely stressed out or extremely upset or both that all I want to do is simply just eat. I hate this.

I've had my VSG on July 18th, 2012. My original weight was 330lbs before the surgery. I've lost 142lbs as result of the surgery. My current weight bounces between 182 to 195lbs based on my eating.

It has been fairly easy up until this point. I will admit that I am miserable. I am at a point in my life that I wish I was not in, but unfortunately, I am in it. At this point: No steady job with benefits, still in college, left my lying boyfriend, and I don't really have any close friends anymore, because I moved back in with my parents due to economic difficulties.

As result of my age (being 26), I was kicked off the extremely good health insurance that my family has. The other downside of being a VSG, not many insurance companies like to offer decent health insurance to you as result of being a VSG. My current insurance is Coordinated Health Benefits. For the record, they are *awful*. I do not recommend them. You are always billed later for any office visits, blood work, and you pay obscene prices for medications.

I have explained to my parents that I am struggling to lose this remaining weight. All I am met with are comments of severe negativity and shame. Not support and encouragement. My parents are *NOT* supportive of me in the sense of encouragement and wanting to see me be successful as a VSG. They are not willing to be helpful at all. All they wish to do is tempt me with more junk food. They are of the personality, "It's OK for us to eat whatever we want and be fat, but it is not OK for you to be fat. Yet we are not willing to help you by changing our eating habits since we all live in the same house."

I don't know what to do. I don't have anyone in my life who I can talk to about this. I can't afford to talk to someone who is a mental health provider, because I do not have a steady full-time job with benefits. I am in the process of wrapping up my Bachelors' degree in Legal Studies and Business Management. I am currently looking for a job that suits my skill set.

I feel like I just do not have any hope. I wish I did have hope. I pray to God everyday to please bring me some hope. That's all I want is something good to believe in.

I don't want to be my starting weight again, but I know if I continue on this destructive path that I will be...

- Texas Belle[/quote']

Hi I'm sorry u are feeling down... Can you apply for Medicaid? That's one option ...does your school offer any psychological help? You should definitely try and inquire about that.... I know my college does...

[SueJH 205]

I also moved back home when I decided to go back to school. I am 10 weeks out from my surgery. My family has not changed their eating habits or stopped bringing snack food in the house, and honestly, why should they? I am the one who wanted this surgery and to change my life, not them. I buy my own food, prepare it myself, and usually eat by myself. They are supportive in that they tell me I'm doing a good job and they can see the difference, but I don't expect them to change their eating habits. Hell, I went out with a close friend a couple of weeks ago to see a band and as I was sitting sipping on my ice tea, she ordered a chocolate Peanut Butter cup dessert thing!

We can't change those around us, we just need to do what we have to do take care of ourselves. You can do it!

[ScottsGirl 106]

You have friends here! Your family's attitude is probably the reason you got so heavy in the first place!!! Steer clear of them every opportunity that you get. Make new friends, see if any of us on here live close to you - start a new thread for this. Also, YOU are the master controller of your body, don't forget that. As far as having no hope...??? You are on your way to a Master's Degree which is an accomplishment that many people around you can't say that they have attained!!!!!!!! Your life is going to get better, I ASSURE you that this is only a temporary situation and you will be in a much better place sooner than you think. Pease stay focused on what you need to do for your health, you will figure that out. You also need to realize that "depression" itself will make you gain weight no matter how little you eat, so get out there and walk away the sadness!

WE are here for you.

[Momonanomo 534]

It seems you need to be more surrounded by positive & supportive people. If your surgeon is near you, maybe his program offers a support group that is free. Or, maybe there is a local meeting of overeaters anonymous, also free. You mentioned that you pray to God...so I also suggest getting involved in a church. Create your own, new family. You cut loose the bad boyfriend, it is time to realize your parents are damaging to you as well. Dont let ANYONE stand in the way of what you really want!!!