What's the worst thing someone said to you?

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

Hey Stacy G I'm going to place a Mary Kay order in a couple of days. Do you or your family members need anything. Anyone else reading this can also place an order on my website if you'd like. I don't want anyone to feel left out:) www.marykay.com/mlowrey Creditcard accepted..

Does MK still have the same fingernail stuff line? It was five layers of stuff to make your nails really hard. It works too. Bottom coat, brown stuff, polish, brown stuff, top coat, something like that. It's been years since I used it.

[Dancing Queen 0]

The worst thing would have to be when I was in 9th grade. I weighed about 170 and my dad got out the scale and made me look at what I weighed and then he got on the scale and showed me that he weighed less than me. Talk about disfunction. He's made up for it since then and since I have gotten banded and tells me I am looking so good. He's let me know how proud he is of me but what a blow. I don't think I will ever forget that. The things we learn from our parents...we especially learn how NOT to parent our own children.

Dancing Queen

Dr. Rumbaut

6/27/06

257/184/145

[twhite 0]

I remember when after having my first child i could not get the weight off (my wedding dress was a size 1 a year earlier) i had gained 75 lbs. I went to see my grandma and she yelled for my grandpa to bring some chalk so when she hugged me she could mark off as she went so she could hug all of me. Then i think my last straw was last fall me and my husband went to a bengals football game, we were walking to the stadium and a group of grown drunk men were behind us one started yelling for my husband to buy me a newer jersey but to make sure the new one was big enoug to fit and maybe we could use the old one for a banner, then began mooing. That was it for me, i was so hurt i began to cry, i got so mad i could not enjoy the game. Then after we sat down the people who were to sit next to us did not because he said i was to fat. Now i admit i am fat but i fit just fine in the seats. People can be so crule and insensitive

[jenn6239 0]

I was laying in the recovery room right after surgery still knocked out from the anesthetic and the first thing I remember is this nurse holding my hand up in front of me and saying, "are your fingers always this pudgy or are the swollen?". Nice lady!

[ladybug390 0]

after i first saw this thread i thought...i cant think of anything mean people have said...but after reading the posts i realized that i can relate to almost every single one. boy was i wrong--

once in high school my tall blonde skinny friend told me i was LUCKY because if a guy ever liked me i would definitely know it was because of my personality...if she wanted to get a guy shed have to walk around in a bikini.... yeah totally true...being disgusting really comes in handy for attracting people with my personality....i just sat there trying to decide if she was just dumb or really really mean. probably a healthy mixture of both...

Also, i totally agree that sometimes its what isnt said that hurts- my boyfriend of 3 years (that just recently dumped me) NEVER ONCE ever...said i was pretty or i looked nice or anything. i was smart, and funny. the staples of a fat girl, but never pretty. that sucks.

and finally....my friend was trying to pay me a "compliment"...i guess..."lindsey you are pretty, do you know that? you are...really....you are pretty do you believe that?? he was really trying to convince me like i was just some freak of nature .....um...yeah...i never really thought i was ugly..but thanks for thinking that i needed to be convinced. ouch.

oh yeah and one from home- one day i had let my hair go curly and hadn't put on my contacts...sitting around the house in my glasses and curly hair when my dad said ...wow...you look JUST LIKE mikey from american choppers. i had never seen the show and was offended that i looked like someone called Mikey (a guy) but after i looked it up to see what he looked like i just started crying. i look exactly like him...really? dont even have blond hair...must just be the fatness and curly hair and glasses that makes up an EXACT resemblance...that really hurt. (hahah oh yeah and since when do i have a beard....?)

[Bandito 0]

I was clothes shopping on vacation in Hong Kong and on entering one shop the owner yelled out at me across her crowded store "There is nothing in here to fit you" and then proceeded to shoo me out of her shop like I was a piece of vermin. That was over 10 years ago and I have never forgotten the humiliation I felt that day.

[char 0]

I have to say people can be hurtful because they don't understand the lapband and often don't listen when you try to explain. I've only had the band for less then 5 wks and people are asking me if I regret doing it!! Give me a chance, will ya. I've lost 25lbs and currently at a standstill but I find that people offer few words of encouragement, but are overflowing with discouraging words. Today an obese friend of mine said "wow, you sure can eat alot". I had a small scoop of tuna and some cottage cheese, yikes, made me feel as if I had a brownie sundae! Sick of negative comments:angry

[DonnaMarie 0]

I totally understand where you are coming from Char! People think that when you have lapband surgery, you will drop all the weight instantly. It takes time and everyone is different! I have lost 45 lbs since surgery last July and I always get, thats all? What the heck? I think that is pretty darn good!

One thing that is coming back to me was when I first stated working for my company in a different office. This woman informed me that I should get a "bigger" chair because I am so "tall".. yeah right.. that is why you need a bigger chair.. granted.. I was about a size 20 or 22 at the time and I am almost five nine.. I wasn't gargantuan.. I told her that I fit in the chair just fine and if I go crashing to the floor she would be the first to know about it.. she turned beet red and never mentioned it again.. some people.. sheesh.. LOL

DonnaMarie

[carolel 0]

I've had lots but the worst I can think of right now was a doctor I had went to for a bladder tac. He did the surgery but afterwards, came out and said that it may not work because he couldn't do it correctly because of the all the fat. I was about a size 18 at the time.

But..I had the last laugh....and it's still funny today after 7 years.

At my follow-up appt., he was running around like crazy..lots and lots of patients. He didn't have much time for me. He was very hurried that day and it was just a quick visit and he was ready to go. I didn't keep him long..I couldn't......you see...he had this HUGE booger hanging out his nose into his moustache. You think i told him? Nah.....I let him go right on to his next patient. Hopefully they didn't tell him either. I still laugh about this. he was such an ahole!

[yukaputz 0]

Man, I can't even begin to count the crappy things people have said to me but the one that sticks out in my mind was a month before being banded. This moron pulls up next me in traffic while I was on my motorcycle and says "your to big for that bike". I have a large cruiser style motorcycle. I looked back at him and said "get out of the car f*ck nut and find out how big I really am". I ended up just driving off. But I didn't ride my motorcycle again till just a few weeks ago. Even now 45 lbs down I'm still feeling self conscience on it.

[rabid24 0]

People are full of crappy things to say. Gotta have a reason to feel better than someone else. Well, I have LOTS, but I'll choose from a few of the most recent.

When I was taking a childbirth class at the local hospital with about 10 other couples, the "teacher" pointed me out to the class as someone who's monitors wouldn't register very well because I was so overweight. It was absolutely humiliating. Why couldn't she have just said that they don't work as well on heavier women, why did I have to be pointed out? People know what 'overweight' means without an example. I felt like I was treated like a non-person. Many healthcare people don't realize that we are human, just like the little skinny ones. I don't appreciate being treated like that when I'm alone with a doctor, let alone in front of 20 other people.

Oh, and this is one that was particularly humiliating since I have to see these people everyday. When I was real close to giving birth to my last baby, one co-worker mentioned to another that I might not show up for work because I was due any minute. The other co-worker replied "Really? I didn't know she was pregnant, I thought she was just fat." To make matters even worse, the first co-worker had to tell me about it as soon as I got to work. When he saw this upset me he (yes, they were both men having this conversation) ran back and told everyone else at work about what had happend because 'people shouldn't be talking about you like that'. Humiliating!

[AshRae84 0]

Wow. I've only managed to make it through 5 pages so far, but I'm astonished at the things people feel they have the right to say. Even more so our family members.

Here are a few that spring to mind for me...

When I was in the 4th grade (My weight problems started @ 6), there was a boy in my class (I should add the FATTEST kid in the class, much bigger than me) would sing to me (To the tune of Bad Boys *The Cops Theme*) "Fat girl Fat girl, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when she sits on you?" To this day that still makes me want to cry. But I keep telling myself that kid weighs 400lbs now, and is living in some trailor park with a fat wife, and 6 kids. :-P

2nd story, happened I would say when I was maybe around 11, 12. My mom had gone grocery shopping, and came home and I was asleep on the couch watching TV, and she comes in and says to me "Can't you get off your fat ass and do something?" Granted, she was having a really bad day, and since apologized, but that was still stings to this day.

3rd, just happened recently. My grandma and I went to see the 20th Anniversary Theater release of Dirty Dancing, we were in my car on the drive, and talking about me having my lapband surgery, and she made that comment that 'maybe after I have it, I'll have a life.' Ouch. I work full time, go to school full time, when does she expect me to have time to have this so called 'life'.

4th, I recently was dating a guy (We've split for geographical reasons *he's moving to Florida, I live in Oklahoma*). We met online, and then met in person, when I asked him honestly what he thought of me, he responded "You're bigger than I expected." Ouch. That one stung. I guess I shouldn't have asked his honest opinion. And I didn't know whether to be offended or not, because he apparently wasn't shallow, because he still wanted to be with me, despite my size... but it hurt that he had to point it out.

5th, my nail tech is vietnamese, and speaks broken English, and I think her intentions were well, but she still hurt me, when she said "You have such a beautiful face, such pretty features, if you lost weight, you'd be beating the guys off with a stick."

And then there are the usuals, my dad offering to pay for a brand new wardrobe if I'd lose weight, the "You don't know how pretty you'd be if you lost weight."

And my personal fav, from my mother "If you had been a boy, you would've made one hell of a linebacker..."

~*Ash*~

[AshRae84 0]

People are full of crappy things to say. Gotta have a reason to feel better than someone else. Well, I have LOTS, but I'll choose from a few of the most recent.

When I was taking a childbirth class at the local hospital with about 10 other couples, the "teacher" pointed me out to the class as someone who's monitors wouldn't register very well because I was so overweight. It was absolutely humiliating. Why couldn't she have just said that they don't work as well on heavier women, why did I have to be pointed out? People know what 'overweight' means without an example. I felt like I was treated like a non-person. Many healthcare people don't realize that we are human, just like the little skinny ones. I don't appreciate being treated like that when I'm alone with a doctor, let alone in front of 20 other people.

Oh, and this is one that was particularly humiliating since I have to see these people everyday. When I was real close to giving birth to my last baby, one co-worker mentioned to another that I might not show up for work because I was due any minute. The other co-worker replied "Really? I didn't know she was pregnant, I thought she was just fat." To make matters even worse, the first co-worker had to tell me about it as soon as I got to work. When he saw this upset me he (yes, they were both men having this conversation) ran back and told everyone else at work about what had happend because 'people shouldn't be talking about you like that'. Humiliating!

My mom is an RN, she's not a fulltime grandma, but the hospital she was working at before, actually sent them to a seminar on treating morbidly obese patients. (Such as not asking for the "Extra Large Blood Pressure Cuff" in front of the patient.)

Isn't that just common human decency to not hurt your fellow man's feelings?!

~*Ash*~

[rabid24 0]

My mom is an RN, she's not a fulltime grandma, but the hospital she was working at before, actually sent them to a seminar on treating morbidly obese patients. (Such as not asking for the "Extra Large Blood Pressure Cuff" in front of the patient.)

Isn't that just common human decency to not hurt your fellow man's feelings?!

~*Ash*~

OH MY GOSH! That has always been one of my number one reasons for wanting to lose weight. I'm so damn sick of having the nurse tell me she'll be right back because she has to go get the big blood pressure cuff!!!! Isn't it funny how the little things get to you.

It's nice that they notice it bothers people now.

[babylovestoys 1]

The meanest thing someone said to me was at a restaurant, a well meaning relative commented "Do you really need that?" when I ordered ice cream for desert.

Not only did it hurt my feelings, it made me feel like I had no self control.

My brother was with us though, & commented that it was not the other persons job to attempt to control my food choices.