Maybe i am the only one

[Nursebarbie 392]

Maybe I am the only one who gets my feelings hurt on these forums. Maybe its the hormones out of wack since surgery. Or maybe its the fact that I haven't been off work for 6 weeks and I feel so isolated, so alone. And this site made me feel so comforted. Like I had this big group of friends in the same boat as me. Tonight I guess some of the hostility is getting to me. It seems if you go against someone who's been here longer or sleeved longer than watch out. I may be newly sleeved but I am not an idiot. My opinions can have value too. Anyhow, just feeling alone and discounted. Thanks for reading.

[Catherine707 253]

Hang in there, this is a tough road and it is helpful to have a forum to share your thoughts and experiences with. Don't worry about what people think or say, as the only thing that really matters is what you know to be your personal truth.

[luckysmomma 407]

I hear ya...you are not alone. And you are very right, your opinions matter just as much as anybody else's on here. Don't let people on here get to you...people are just mean, sometimes intentionally & sometimes unintentionally. Just learn their usernames & ignore their posts. I scroll on past certain people & don't read anything that they post.

[Canary Diamond 186]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way and I can relate. I asked a question on the technical thread last week about why so many women were posting in the Man Room - thought it was exclusive to men and the day I looked at it (I was lurking, I admit it!) there were literally more posts by women than men. The hostility blowback I received was worse than an old lady fart passed through an onion.

You absolutely have a right to your opinions and to own your experience. It's a shame how people use their online personas as barracks walls, which they hide behind and lob angry stink bombs at those who are just here to find information and support.

[hopingtolose2013 81]

I see where you are coming from. I feel the same way. You offer advice and someone who thinks they know more discounts it or spins it. I wrote that the sleeve helped us make better decisions. I got told saying how ridiculous that was. Of course I didn't mean the damn thing had a brain. Anyway...that is one of many. I think there are some that stay on the board all day and think they are experts. I just have to realize you can't have a normal conversation with an idiot. Of course MOST of the peeps on here are cool...but you have a handful that think they have a PHD.

[SlimDreams 175]

I hear you, I'm new here myself and regularly find myself biting my tongue.. I don't know why but that kind of thing always toasts my Cookies, probably bc I hate seeing it in the real world let alone in a "support forum"

Normally I just scroll on by .. and repeat this mantra "haters gonna hate, naysayers gonna nay say" I don't know why but that saying always makes me giggle again..try it out

[mandynichole 169]

Maybe I am the only one who gets my feelings hurt on these forums. Maybe its the hormones out of wack since surgery. Or maybe its the fact that I haven't been off work for 6 weeks and I feel so isolated' date=' so alone. And this site made me feel so comforted. Like I had this big group of friends in the same boat as me. Tonight I guess some of the hostility is getting to me. It seems if you go against someone who's been here longer or sleeved longer than watch out. I may be newly sleeved but I am not an idiot. My opinions can have value too. Anyhow, just feeling alone and discounted. Thanks for reading.[/quote']

[Camella 209]

((((hugs))) I have notice certain people are very negative on this forum. Just remember its not you!! In my opinion we are all dealing with an addiction and probably are carrying around some excess baggage (emotional). I think that manifests itself differently in people. Some people can become defensive or negative as a consequence, but their comments are not a reflection on you. They are also on their own challenging journey! Keep being generous in your advice as there are so many people on here who benefit from it!

[goirish78 100]

As another person who hasn't been around very long, I completely understand what you're talking about. While i appreciate the support and kind sentiments offered on these forums, I have been absolutely floored by the invective, judgemental, and immature responses to some people's innocent questions. Unfortunately, I think there are some folks who are forgetting where they come from (i.e. if you've been overweight for any length of time, then no doubt you've been on the receiving end of some pretty cruel stuff at times), and use their "experience" as a platform to be "more-sleeved-than-thou", so to speak; rather than being sensitive to the fact that there are others at different points of their journey and showing some compassion (or at the very least just refraining from comment), they feel they have license to zing people and otherwise react in a sarcastic and belittling manner. I'm sorry that you were on the receiving end of that today - you don't deserve it and NO ONE does. I'm with Luckysmomma...just start paying attention to screennames and if there are things said that upset you, feel free to skip those folks from now on. Life is too short to waste your energy on those who don't deserve it.

Keep up the good work and hang in there!!

[anniemay 150]

It is prevalent on this site. I don't post often. Check it every couple of days buy find my support in the physical world. You probably won't see any responses from those whom you speak of. Although they will see this because I BELIEVE - just MY opinion - they spend so much time on the forum with their comments because they lack something more tangible.

[Nursebarbie 392]

Thanks. I appreciate all your support.

[anniemay 150]

I actually have found that a local support group is the best if those around you can't fully understand. We have a great one in Dallas.

[Canary Diamond 186]

...use their "experience" as a platform to be "more-sleeved-than-thou", so to speak...

LOL! Love this! You sleev-eth the truth, my child.

[lsereno 2,525]

Hi Nurse Barbie,

Sorry your feelings are hurt. One thing I have found is that whoever you don't like will probably be gone in a few months. Every online forum I've ever participated in has had quite a few dust-ups as time goes by. I just stay out of them whenever possible. And hormones here don't help: I was so emotional the first few months post-op. It was way easier to hurt my feelings then than it is now.

I do agree with another poster that F2F support groups have a lot to offer.

Lynda

[Nursebarbie 392]

Just like people to get along. Not always realistic I know.