I need Advice!

[farmer49 11]

She wants the surgery very badly.

I explain the details daily. I also made her download this board on her phone and she has to read posts everyday on it. She is made to keep a food journal and use myfitnesspal.

She knows the good' date=' bad, and ugly. She knows she will change alot of things with the surgery and she says she is okay with that. Of course, we all say we are ready, even adults, but its different when its over and done with.

Our insurance doesn't cover this so we are self pay and don't have to go for a psych evaluation. We have found other kids who did it at her age.

One of the Doctors in Mexico even did a 12 year old. And they all seem to be doing great.[/quote']

First thing is pray hard about it.

Second I just had surgery two weeks ago and I have been big all my life and was made fun of till I got big enough to put a stop to it. But I have been on diets all my life and nothing worked until February I went to the Hospital of what they thought was a heart attack. I was diagnosed with sugar, high cholesterol, high blood pressure and quite a few things to say the least but it was an eye opener. I went on a diet and lost 49 pounds in 4months and this helped greatly with the surgery, the morning of my surgery a women before me who did not diet caused a two hour operation to last over 7 hours because of complication.

Thirdly, if she can not loose weight before the surgery she will not have the mind set afterwords. And last of all pray some more. Good luck.

[SuzyB 182]

I think it would be worth it to have a psych eval even if not required. My dr will do adolescents but usually they are 16 and up. I was like your daughter, about the same size. Not sure I would have been mature enough to handle it then.

[wannabaloser 59]

I have not made up my mind at all. I was just answering questions.

My daughter has not been to a psychologist for this but she does see one regularly becauae she suffers from severe shyness.

I did talk to her psychologist about this a little and she thinks she will be okay for surgery and she thinks it will help alot for her shyness.

She is of course a child psychologist and does not do WLS evals.

[NellieBean 70]

I have a daughter and somehow, she did not end up with the same issues with food that her mother did.

That said, if she did and was in the same situation as your daughter, I would want to provide her the best possible life. Maybe, you should talk to her pediatrician and find a therapist to help you make this decision. At least then you know you made the most informed choice with the help of professionals and not strangers on a forum.

Obesity is a disease. We all know that. Saying that she should try other options first, it is so hard when each of us has ridden that rollercoaster so many times to end up here.

I do not envy this decision but think your daughter is very lucky to have you as her mom.

[No game 14,437]

I have not made up my mind at all. I was just answering questions.

My daughter has not been to a psychologist for this but she does see one regularly becauae she suffers from severe shyness.

I did talk to her psychologist about this a little and she thinks she will be okay for surgery and she thinks it will help alot for her shyness.

She is of course a child psychologist and does not do WLS evals.

Please know that this surgery takes a lot of commitment and sacrifices I would ask you to put more thought into it.

I have a teenage daughter... I know how she is when she wants or "needs" something.

Bring her to a therapist that specializes in disordered eating... Talk to her PCP and perhaps do the surgery first so you can prepare her for what's to come. Because believe me there is a lot to come!

About her being "approved" by Garcia?

I'm sorry but at the end of the day she's just money to him..

[wannabaloser 59]

This is definitely the hardest decision.

Her doctor has really not given an opinion on wls. She has done dier pills, diet programs, weight watchers, all the stuff we have all done but she has no results. The doctors cant find a reason why but she doesn't lose weight.

I am just torn. Idw her to have to go through high school suffering and have to do this at 18 anyway and all that could have been prevented.

On the other hand I dont want to do the surgery and she cant handle it and winds up worse than she is.

Its just horrible.

[No game 14,437]

I feel for you, and her. I know what it's like to be an overweight teen... I'm so glad that your really thinking about all the possibilities...

I really think a therapist that specializes in eating disorders would be a great FIRST step.

I say that because the sleeve in itself is not a cure either and she will need to work out her issues around food regardless. There are plenty of people here that are sleeved and are still struggling with overeating and eating the wrong foods for the wrong reasons..

So the therapy that I'm suggesting is only to help her make those steps then perhaps down the road just a bit longer she can choose the sleeve.

[chris54 106]

I don't think we r being incentive hve u thought about when she comes home what if something happens and there r no peds with wls expertise? No wls doc might not want to touch to her. Which one is the mom? Or is this just a plant I think so

[wannabaloser 59]

What do you mean which one is the mom and is this a plant?

I dont understand what you mean, sorry.

[chris54 106]

Good luck to u both

[wannabaloser 59]

If u are suggesting I am not real, I assure you I am.

I have been posting on here since February.

[Nursebarbie 392]

I understand the pain your daughter is feeling. I was the same way. Missed 43 days my freshman year of high school because I hated the way I looked. I didn't make the best choices and even didn't reach my potential in school all because I didn't want anyone seeing me. If she has a genetic link to being overweight than all the diet and exercise in the world won't likely be successful long term. The sleeve can help her NOW and alleviate years of private humilaition of being obese. She may just blossom after that. I would do it for my daughter in a heart beat. There's no point in waiting until she's older and even more introverted. 14 year olds have babies. That is way harder than a sleeve. I will stand my ground on this one. You are her mother nobody else and I for one support you.

[Nursebarbie 392]

And who ever called you a plant is not being helpful. Why are so people getting all uppity on these forums? Now who is being judgemental? Shouldn't we understand intimately how it feels to be looked at as less than human because we are obese? It seems some of us are way too quick to judge and end up putting their big size 11wide foot in their mouths!

[No game 14,437]

If u are suggesting I am not real' date=' I assure you I am.

I have been posting on here since February.[/quote']

Some here have gone off the deep end. Some are not sleeved yet and some are newly sleeved and haven't lived this life long enough to give a full picture... (Sorry that is MY opinion)

As a mother talking to another mother, wait just a bit do yours first. Really you will not be able to care for her like you should if you do it together.

Get some perspective let her get counseled on these issues then make the decision.

[wannabaloser 59]

I understand the pain your daughter is feeling. I was the same way. Missed 43 days my freshman year of high school because I hated the way I looked. I didn't make the best choices and even didn't reach my potential in school all because I didn't want anyone seeing me. If she has a genetic link to being overweight than all the diet and exercise in the world won't likely be successful long term. The sleeve can help her NOW and alleviate years of private humilaition of being obese. She may just blossom after that. I would do it for my daughter in a heart beat. There's no point in waiting until she's older and even more introverted. 14 year olds have babies. That is way harder than a sleeve. I will stand my ground on this one. You are her mother nobody else and I for one support you.