To the Ladies of the World.......I SAY SORRY!

[AussieLady 521]

Hi Ladies,

As an Aussie I realized today that I owe all of you a huge apology. You see, here we were just getting on with our lives, loving our men and all the things they did for us like... Opening the car door for us or the door into the restaurant and pulling out our chair and telling us how lovely we were, and never commenting on our weight because that would be impolite and giving us compliments and and and.........

Then along came Germaine Greer. Suddenly we had to feel weak and insulted if men did these things for us. We had to burn our bras, shave our heads and turn our men into women. Though secretly we loved this man who wanted to do those things for us, we could not admit it because if we did we were letting women down.

I want the men of the past back. Those who don't judge us by how much we weigh and who love us because of who we are. I want the door opened for me and the chair pulled out.

I want a world where weight does not enter into how beautiful we are. I may be a dreamer who does not see this in my lifetime, but I want this for my children and grandchildren.

[Nate74 45]

Those Men still exist there just usually Married already

[AussieLady 521]

Those Men still exist there just usually Married already

Are you married Nate? My hand is up if you're not!

[leeann71 539]

I have a real man, he does everything a man is subpose to do. We still after 27 years still walk hand in hand. He always open the door and closes it as well. He tells me everyday since we got together that I am beautiful. He loved me small and then big and now medium and eventually small again. I know I am lucky. There are still very good men out there in this world and I am sure one day your paths will cross, just be ready to see him when it happens. Good luck

[Nate74 45]

Are you married Nate? My hand is up if you're not!

Yes for 11 years now. I still open the door for my wife and i tell her how gorgeous i think she is everyday even before the surgery. She is finally starting to see what i have known all along. I am a hopeless romantic though and i find that there aren't too many men that are. My wife says I'm a geek like Leonard from big bang theory if you've ever seen the show.

[HatheryOnHerWay 603]

i admit I had to Google Germaine Greer! I didn't know who she was. I am not exactly a feminist

[DeezJeanz 1,065]

Are you married Nate? My hand is up if you're not!

Amen, LOLOL!!

[sharonintx 1,275]

You are right Aussie Lady. Personally, I see nothing wrong with men having the "man" role and the ladies having the "woman" role. Not to say that we need to be considered secondary to men, but there's not a thing wrong with being treated like a lady.

[stacechase 251]

Hi Ladies,

As an Aussie I realized today that I owe all of you a huge apology. You see, here we were just getting on with our lives, loving our men and all the things they did for us like... Opening the car door for us or the door into the restaurant and pulling out our chair and telling us how lovely we were, and never commenting on our weight because that would be impolite and giving us compliments and and and.........

Then along came Germaine Greer. Suddenly we had to feel weak and insulted if men did these things for us. We had to burn our bras, shave our heads and turn our men into women. Though secretly we loved this man who wanted to do those things for us, we could not admit it because if we did we were letting women down.

I want the men of the past back. Those who don't judge us by how much we weigh and who love us because of who we are. I want the door opened for me and the chair pulled out.

I want a world where weight does not enter into how beautiful we are. I may be a dreamer who does not see this in my lifetime, but I want this for my children and grandchildren.

I understand what you're wanting—to know that chivalry is not dead, to see some of the traditional politeness and respect shown by men to women. I would love to see this too, and Nate, kudos to you for keeping the gentleman vibe alive!

I would like to say, however, that I disagree with using the birth of feminism as the scapegoat for the deterioration of these traditions. Times change, priorities shift, and culture itself (not just feminism) shapes the modification of behavior whether or not you're a man or a woman.

If it means sacrificing doors being held open for me and occasional compliments by men in order for me to get more respect & upward mobility in the workplace, make strides in politics and business, and be seen as powerful, intelligent, capable & independent without needing a man by my side, it is a sacrifice I would make without thinking twice.

Personally, I would not want "the men of the past" back. Sure, it would be nice to have the door opened, chairs pulled out, and be shown random acts of kindness by men...however, with those traits of the "men of the past" also comes sexism, treating women as objects and caretakers—of the house, the kids, all while expected to look perfectly pretty at all times. I'm not saying that all men of the past felt this way, just suggesting that the past was not all wine & roses.

Also, I'm unclear as to what you mean about "turning our men into women." I certainly hope that it isn't a judgment on men who are stay-at-home fathers, in touch with and open with their emotions, etc. All men are men, regardless of their choices & lifestyles, and it seems a bit insulting to men to insinuate that they're "turning into women." Do you also feel that women who are professional athletes & corporate executives are "turning into men?" I'm not trying to argue, just want to make sure that we're all sensitive to the fact that any "rules" associated with what makes a man a man or a woman a woman are entirely socially constructed (and frankly, kind of stupid).

Lastly, just to clarify, Germaine Greer did not advocate burning bras, as noted in The Female Eunuch.

[Nate74 45]

I don't think treating a woman like a lady is somehow making her less or unimportant in anyway. I think treating her like she is less than you or her thoughts and opinions aren't as important is where the disrespect comes in. I can see how due to society how some men might be that way due to ego or whatever. I have an Aunt who is very successful who never married as men would either want to use her or be threatened by her success. I think a lot of it is how the men were raised and how their father treated their mother. My mother had college degree's where my father had experience but not a degree. My father always treated my mother with respect and love and they both always taught me to respect women. So i think how your parents were with each other and what they taught you is a big decider on how you will be in your relationships. My parents did divorce when i was 13 but i think what children learn is from 5 to 12 anyways that sticks with them throughout their life. My wife has two of her own businesses and she is very intelligent even though she has no degree where i have 3. It doesn't make here opinions any less important than mine. I think in essence it comes down to a respect factor. If you respect the one your with and show them love then treating them like a lady doesn't make you less of a man or her somehow make her less of a woman for accepting that role.

[Wags 549]

{swoon} :-)