Steady losers ;-)

[beversman 0]

OMG - so, um since I tell you guys everything anyway -- I got this call at 3:40AM this morning from a very dear, old friend of 5 years... havent seen him in over a year. I was dead asleep when he called, but very glad to hear from him.

He and I have always had a "connection" since we met. Weird to explain... but he has been dating the same girl for almost 8 years now. So.... as far as he and I go, nothing ever became of it.

I went my seperate way. He went his seperate way. We talk once every few months and keep as up to date as two people can keep who only talk twice a year.

Um, well... Lets just say he ended up coming over and I didnt get any sleep last night. I am offically an idiot. I dont know... he and I just have that comfortable trust between us. I've known things about him for years that he wont even tell his girlfriend. In fact, I know things about him that he has never told another living soul, family included. His "girlfriend" and he have had a platonic relationship for 7 1/2 years. I don't know... I felt like he needed me. I know that was dumb on my part. He very much loves this girl he is with... but they are just not a traditional couple.

They are more like best friends. I am the girl that drives him wild.

Should I have said no? yeah, probably.... I knew going into it that I would be the outsider. Even though he initiated it...

ugh... Im think this means I am a home-wrecker.

So... how is that for wednesday night drama... GOD -- stupid men.

oh wait...

Stupid BRANDI.

What is the world when you meet someone you are attracted to. That is attacted to you. That you are completely comfortable with... that you can trust... that can't be a relationship?

hhmmm...

Oh well, horrible part is... i am pretty much ok with it. I knew what I was doing. He was and still is a good old friend that I love dearly. I think I got being there for him and "BEING there for him" a bit confused. However, I gave him three opportunites to head for the door and change his mind. Completely up and walked away, and he still was clear on what he wanted to have happen.

This has been another episode of "Days of our Lives"

--UGH!

haha

love ya mammas!

--Brandi

[StephC 0]

But was it good? Sorry I just couldn't help myself!

First Boo, now you ... sheesh I guess we should all change our names to Brandy! You two are sizzling!:flame:

[beversman 0]

OMG, Steph... it was really, really good. The kind that is TOO good. like "connection" good.

I'm telling you. This guy and I have been "waiting" for this for about 5 years. It has been a long time coming... haha (boy THAT sounds appropriate given the context)

Thing is. It was a one time thing that wont happen again. He told me that this morning before he left. He doesn't want to hurt me. I just dont know why I do that to myself. ha. I am such an idiot. He does make sense though - I know I would get attached eventually if we kept that up. BUT I always have been attached to him.

Honestly, I've actually known him since I was about 11 years old. I had the biggest crush on him all the way through school. HA! Went to school with him since Jr High. We just never hung out in school. We found each other again about 5 years ago after i moved back home and became very close friends. Then, our lives just kind of went different directions... we just always check in on each other regardless of where life take us. I guess it will stay that way.

I just wasn't expecting it to be that good. Now, I just wish it could happen again... ha, WOW i wasnt expecting THAT. I'm sure I will get over it soon, but damn.

BUT I am still his good friend... so I warned him I would beat him up if he got weird over it, and we had a nice long talk afterward. I think things will continue as they always have. We will see how things go...

I need to find MY guy. Not a friend with benefits. I have too many um, (cough cough) "needs" as of late. Not having a steady man in my life is NOT working out for me.

oh yeah, did I say WOW? haha

-----------------------------------

OH! um, here is a picture attached of the jeans I bought yesterday... and um, YES they fit. Now, granted these jeans must run WAY big -- I think i am really an 8.

BUT damn it they were a feakin SIZE 4!! I just about did a cartwheel out of the dressing room. I decided to try them on as a joke. and they FIT! I took the picture while I had them on (with the tag still on) as proof that they fit! haha

[StephC 0]

You go girlie!!! I believe we all need good sex every now and again. Its not just the sex thing but the caressing that our bodies crave. I'm glad it was WOW!

As for those jeans ....

GET FRICKING OUT!!!

The last time I was a size 4 was in 1986... no 1985. Then I had my 2nd daughter in '86 and that was that. I am really shooting for a 8.

[StephC 0]

so whats up with the little A/A button in the corner, I thought I was changing my font size and I ended up with a hundred smilies.

[sweethot143 2]

wow, i play bunco completely different that that. We play with 12 people and switch partners and move to a different table after every round. Basically it's a dice game that takes zero brains or skill, so it's fun to socialize and laugh and have a good time. a way for housewives like me to get out without kids. lol.

Wow Brandi! I'm speechless on your wednesday night! Just be careful, take care of you. I just hope that you don't lose respect for one another. It's easy in the moment to say you won't but as long as neither one of you compromised your integrity then you should be ok.

He is obviously needing something and not fulfilled where he is now. What kind of relationship for 8 years is platonic? Unless it's a religious thing.

I hope that this turns out in your favor and you don't lose your best friend.

I'm optimistic for you. Oh and WAY 2 GO on the size 4!! crazy. I would be living in those pants with the tags on!

[StephC 0]

Bunco - yep we switch partners - theres 8 of us so we play 2 tables, switch the best and worst pair up for the 2nd half. It is a mindless game that is great fun. Years ago when I was a stay at home mom we played yahtzee, almost everyday! Once a week 4 of us would play scrabble, it was also a nice night away from the kids.

[beversman 0]

ahhhh, he isn't my best friend... otherwise, I dont think he would have put me in the position. It was his decision to come here. and I gave him three different opportunties to leave. I am single and have nothing to feel bad about. I think he will have problems with it... BUT

He is an adult that made his decisions. I can't play "conscience" for him. I refuse to do that. We are all responsible for the decisions we make.

For me it was a one night thing... and almost seen as a "favor for a friend"

He has problems with his life he just has to sort out... I dont plan on being a part of that. I have too many problems of my own. I just got a crazy night out of it.

I feel like I shouldnt have done it now. It was not the smartest thing. BUT I am A OK with it. Another step on life's "road of learning" -- hasnt affectecd my life for better or worse... that is the only reason I question doing it.

I should only do things that make my life better... otherwise, what's the point? ya know.

(sigh) aaghhhh, I will figure this life out eventually. :-) I just like doing it the hard way. After what my ex-husband did... the last thing I want is a relationship. I am kind of emotional detached from people. It will be a long time before I am ready to even TRY that again.

[sweethot143 2]

ahhhh, he isn't my best friend... otherwise, I dont think he would have put me in the position. It was his decision to come here. and I gave him three different opportunties to leave. I am single and have nothing to feel bad about. I think he will have problems with it... BUT

He is an adult that made his decisions. I can't play "conscience" for him. I refuse to do that. We are all responsible for the decisions we make.

For me it was a one night thing... and almost seen as a "favor for a friend"

He has problems with his life he just has to sort out... I dont plan on being a part of that. I have too many problems of my own. I just got a crazy night out of it.

I feel like I shouldnt have done it now. It was not the smartest thing. BUT I am A OK with it. Another step on life's "road of learning" -- hasnt affectecd my life for better or worse... that is the only reason I question doing it.

I should only do things that make my life better... otherwise, what's the point? ya know.

(sigh) aaghhhh, I will figure this life out eventually. :-) I just like doing it the hard way. After what my ex-husband did... the last thing I want is a relationship. I am kind of emotional detached from people. It will be a long time before I am ready to even TRY that again.

I hope that this works out in the most positive way for you, especially since you said you've always had a connection. Which I can completely understand. I've been in the same situation, except i'm not single, so whole different ball game that I wouldn't dare mess with.

From what I am reading, I think you are handling it very maturely. Which is exactly what I've come to know from you. =)

I like how you said, " I should only do things that make my life better" that's a good way to put that. Gives some perspective. I always try to make a decision based upon what the positive outcome will be, if any

Please don't take my last post as being judgmental or anything, I just was making sure you were watching out for yourself and not going to get hurt by this. Since you've been hurt so recently. YOu know I have a ton of respect for you!

[bkwalling 0]

Alright ladies let me start by saying brandi you are a firecracker losing weight has given you so much more than I think you know I just knowing you online can tell a big difference in your self worth go gurl congrats on the fours i would have passed out

steph and sweethot jogging way to go oh mi I can hardley believe how far we all have came

and brandy the grocery man that was a moment to die for

I had another nsv at work this guy was looking for me because I had waited on him earlier that day I work at a bank for yall that don;t know

and he was like were is that lady with brown hair he said she is medium build cute and younger I got back from lunch and my coworker told me I about passed out medium built I said he needs a exam of his eyes but all the same I am on the cloud nine offically

i am losing about 3 lbs a wk now ladies hooray

[Boo Boo Kitty 3]

Steph--ya he was pretty nice looking..lol but not for me!

Brandi--a freaking size 4 girl! You are doing so great girl! You deserve it so much, you are working so hard! WOO HOOOO!!!

Bk--3 pounds a week! GREAT JOB! We aer all so proud of you! Woo hoo!! Keep it up baby!

[sweethot143 2]

so now i have shin splints in both of my shins! it's very painful. so I couldn't jog yesterday, but i walked 2.5 miles up hills a lot. I introduced myself to this really sweet single german girl who lives downstairs in my house and asked her if she likes walking and she yeah so we went together and we had a great time. then we met these other big bunch of walkers who do 4 miles every night with nordic 'i[07um908-06=kwalking, which is walking with like ski poles. so they invited us to come tonight, so i'm gonna try it.

Maybe i'll finally pick up a bit ofgerman?

[StephC 0]

Sweethot I'm glad you found someone to walk with. I know for me it is so much easier to walk with my neice. Although now that I started jogging that 1/2 a mile it goes really fast. My only problem now is I'm too fast for my little dogs, they like to snoop and play and now that I'm jogging they have a hard time keeping up.

Bk - 3 lbs a week!! How in the heck are you doing that? - PLease tell me. Are you keeping your calories below a certain mark? I'm thinking I really need to get mine alittle lower. At 1300 and walking I'm only losing 1.25 a week. WTG on the guy looking for you. Its so good to be medium isn't it?

I saw a picture of me from last summer - omgoodness!!!! FAT face, no wonder my hubster keeps calling me his beautiful wife.

[beversman 0]

sweethot -- oh I did not take it badly! promise. I share what I share because I like the feedback of neutral parties... so dont worry. I agreed with you had to say.

I just wanted to make sure that this guy wasnt confused with my BEST friend Eric. Not counting my family he really is the man in my life that I truly love the most. So, I just wanted to distinguish between the two

I get to go see my Eric tonight!! He called me six times yesterday... haha. He heard I was going to Indianapolis for my best girlfriend's Bday party and he wanted to know why I wasn't coming to see him if I was in town... So, instead of just going up Saturday night I am headed up tonight (late).

bkwalling -- yeah, i know i've changed alot. i am much more confident with myself in many ways. I make alot of stupid choices but at least I am picking and choosing instead of "taking what I can get" -- I dont put up with people's crap these days. Like I said, if it isn't making ME happy or a better person. I am over it. I refuse to waste my time on things that don't benefit me or make me happy. So, THAT is a change.

----------------------------------

Oh, here is a funny story... per my little brother (who is 16) I am currently forbidden to return to the local skate park in our home town.

Why? you may ask...

Well, apparently... all of his little teenage friend have come to the conclusion that his older sister is really hot! hahahaha

It is traumatizing the poor kid. He just started back to school and apparently I've become the "older sister all his friends want to run into" -- His first day of school he came home with this story from one of his friends. Well, apparently, his friends have been talking amongst themselves and I am gaining popularity. haha! Now he has had several different guys all "asking about his sister" -- HA! He was NOT impressed.

I just about cracked up. Ugh, teenagers... they amuse me. He was joking, but he said "you are not aloud to go take pictures at the skatepark anymore."

I'd been there doing a story for my local newpaper that I actually edit/layout. I took some pictures of the new skate-park and did a review of it. Apparently, I was being checked out and wasn't even aware of it.

THAT made me feel pretty good... I got a good laugh out of it anyway.

I told him I would wave at them next time I saw them... and they will all probably turn around and run the other way! :heh: haha... kids!

[sweethot143 2]

Brandi!! Oh my goodness. That is awsome about being the Hot sister! I remember those days back when i was 16, i was the hot older sister. lol.

Have you pranced around them in your size 4's? That's like a young teenagers size girl! crazy. I'm super jealous. I just want to fit into my 13's! almost.