gain goal regain How was your 5:2 day today?

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Hi everyone, I am knee deep in conference mode so I have been MIA from this board. I feel humongous, im in humongous granny panties, mom jeans, resurrecting old tricks for hiding in plain sight v_v

I waste a lot of time feeling worthless, it is maddening. I hate feeling worthless but I have yet to convince myself of my worth, for ANYTHING.

If I could get my pouch reduced and get insurance to cover it, I would do it tomorrow. Suggestions welcome.

[UK Cathy 977]

Hi everyone , been missing for a week taking care of my mum. Love her lots but couldn't live with her long time anymore. I managed to sort out 3 areas of her house with new flooring put down too and arrangements made for another floor to be done next week. Throwing out the crap (precious to her was hard). I'm shattered but feel I have done my best.

My op was done 3 years ago tomorrow and I have realised that I have done nothing with this gift for the last year, in fact my weight is up - I have got yo get to grips with this and take charge.

I don't know if I have shared my good news but my husband now has a job and we are getting to grips with the new routine. It's the first time ha has had a job while we have been in this new house and it is all so different for us. Good different, but different.

I wish everyone a Happy and Blessed EASTER. I know that Christianity is not everyone's bag, but it is mine and this time of the year is the most joyous to me and that is what I want for everyone JOY in their lives.XXX

Edited April 2, 2015 by UK Cathy

[coops 1,790]

Dee, I hope you are ok ... the gain would freak me out too... how is your head space to tackle it now? Are you feeling more positive?

Cathy! What good news about your hubby's job... hope you are ok... and Happy Easter to you too.

I love to dance too, but I have to be honest, I need a few drinkies as I am still really self conscious... glad your back is better now.

I love a good holiday/vacation - have fun when you go Sheryl.

Florinda... when you say pouch reduced, do you mean like a sleeve revision? I would absolutely jump at the chance for that, as I can defo eat more now, nearly 5 years out than I could at 3 years out, but I just can't afford or justify it. It is so expensive here as I would have to go privately again - our NHS didn't pay for my original sleeve and they defo would pay for a revision!

[coops 1,790]

As for me, the whole of March saw zero weight loss... still a pound from my highest bounce range so 6 pounds away from my surgeon's goal and 20lbs away from my personal goal. But then to be honest, I haven't done a proper fast day for the best part of three weeks, but I have been moving more, just walking briskly so I can't really complain to much. In saying that, I did give up sugar for lent; no sugar in tea of coffee, no sweeties, biscuits or cakes and I have been really strict with that... I was kinda hoping that the lack of sugary calories would see a little loss. Never mind eh? I won't be going back to sugar in my Hot Drinks. I've come to like coffee without sugar more than with now. As for the other treats, I have proven that I don't 'need' them, even in stressful situations.

The whole stress of my Mam being poorly has redirected my attentions and I haven't really thought of my own health and needs ... all my energy has been spent on her. However, today we had great news... all her tests, have come back clear- no cancer! Yey! My dad was really emotional with relief as was I! It is such good news and I feel so relieved ... we just gotta keep an eye on her now, but at least we know there is nothing cynical underlying her symptoms, which are still there.

I have been suffering with sinus problems for 3 weeks now and over the last week it has got increasingly worse, ending in me losing a range of hearing. Yesterday I caved in and went to the doc... I have a severe sinus and ear infection, hence the hearing problem, He said that it might take 4-6 weeks for my hearing to get back to normal! Nightmare. I also mentioned that my hot flushes are back... could be stress related. He did go down the route of tablets - HRT - for them, but I really don't want that, not at the moment anyway.

My brother in law is getting married in a month - it has been a very quickly organised wedding - it will be a very small affair with just 15 family members there.

To say I have been stressing over what to wear is an understatement... why do I beat myself up? My hubby, daughter and son are all sorted for their outfits (just shoes to get now) and I am still not sure what to wear. My problem is that, because they all look so good, I don't want to let the side down... I know that sounds really conceited and I suppose it is in a way, but I can't help it.

I ordered a 1950s style dress and my close friends say it looks good and suits me, but as it is so different for me I can't get my head around it... I should learn to trust them as in my heart I know they wouldn't lie to me, especially as they know how important this wedding is.

Any way, the dress I ordered was a UK 14 and it was too small... I need to get a bigger size and this breaks my heart! Like you all have reported, same/similar weight but bigger size is truly gutting. What I really don't get though, is that the clothes in my wardrobe still fit ok... no dramas there... someone tell me that this dress is sized wrong...lol!

I will ordered a larger size though...*sighs*

We are currently on our Easter break, the first week is nearly over and I have no idea where the time has gone! I don't feel like I have done much to be honest. I suppose that is good and bad?

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I am going to challenge you on this - in a caring way!

You are very close to your goal range - every freaking middle aged woman in the developed world wants to weigh 10-20 pounds less than they do. I don't think you NEED a revision. I think you are expressing the same dang annoying thing I am experiencing. I can eat more. I like to eat - especially delicious food . I have to either up the activity or up my personal committment to eating "right" to get back to skinny chick zone.

Ain't nothing like an amazing man in your life to tell you that you are the hottest ticket in town..haha... and i keep thinking, you should have seen me a year ago! ha! but i will take the compliment

Florinda... when you say pouch reduced, do you mean like a sleeve revision? I would absolutely jump at the chance for that, as I can defo eat more now, nearly 5 years out than I could at 3 years out, but I just can't afford or justify it. It is so expensive here as I would have to go privately again - our NHS didn't pay for my original sleeve and they defo would pay for a revision!

[coops 1,790]

Yep! Missus, I think you're probably right! I have to be super vigilant not to gain cos I can graze all day - Christmas taught me that. I have become a food snob though... delish food yes! Junk processed food NO!

To be honest, this time last year I really was at peace with myself... I like the way I looked and felt. However, more recently I have become hard on myself again - finding lots of faults (don't we all?) and just not as contended... the only difference is that now I am feeling lazy about it all. When I look in the mirror now, I don't see a woman who has lost a lot of weight... I see a woman who needs to lose more. I feel I look 'boxy' not curvy.

Probably all in my head.

I too get a lot of compliments, especially from my hubby who every day calls me 'beautiful'. I also get male attention when I go out - although I mainly ignore it. But to be brutally honest, I am not doing this for anyone else. I am doing this for me - for good health, longevity of life at a good quality and frankly looking good is a pure bonus and one I never considered at the start of all this.

This analogy is how I look at my situation now:

5 years ago weighing 17 stone I had a huge mountain to climb to get to 10 stone... I started the walk up that mountain when I had my sleeve... nearly five years later I still haven't reached the summit but for 2-3 of those years (yes it is that long) I have been sat near the top of the mountain looking at the view. I quite like the view from here... it is refreshing. I can see lots of things. But, there is this wall that stops me reaching the top and although to many it isn't such a big wall, to me it is massive! The wall seems impossible to climb over, despite many different attempts. So, I started to think: will the view on the top of the mountain be better than the one I have now? Will the blood, sweat and toil be worth getting to the summit? Or do I stay here admiring the view and comes to terms with the fact that I will never climb the wall?

Is that elusive goal weight worth it - in my head it is, which is why I still try to lose weight; which is why I still yearn to get into a size UK 10 (remember I am only 5 2); which is why I still want a 'normal' bmi!

Does that make any sense?

[swizzly 901]

Makes lots of sense to me, Sue. I never got to my ultimate goal and was only 4kg from it...now 15kg from it... Sigh. The past year has really done my head in, no kidding.

OMG, I have to kill my husband LOL!!! I moved the scaled to the hall and was practically in tears before stepping on...only to find the exact weight I had in the bathroom. Not sure what he's doing wrong, but my weight was accurately measured (if the scales are true) in both locations. WHEW!! I was so freaked out by that...

That being said, I still weigh 10kg more than my supposed top bounce range. UGH. WHAT HAPPENED?? A year ago, I weighed literally 10-12 kg less than I do now. I think it's got to be stress-related, and also what Sheryl said -- not enough exercise. 10k steps per day isn't enough exercise for a middle-aged woman, full stop. I have to go for my four-year follow-up next week and I reckon I will cry on the scales there. I already do, just thinking about it. I've been one of their superstars all along and now I'm just a WLS cliche...

Denise, I'm so sorry about your back pain -- sciatica is THE WORST. I can't believe you got through all that infection mess and still have lots of pain. I'm so sorry. :-(

Sue, glad your mom is okay!!! What a relief.

Florinda...hang in there, baby. I feel like shite too, so I feel ya. But it's got to get better again...

Thanks for the joyful wishes, Cathy. :-) I'm not religious, but I'll take it!!

[UK Cathy 977]

Coops the news about your mum is brilliant, you have just got to build her up now. At work we use ensure which is calorific, the doctor can prescribe it. A small amount as a drink will give her lots of calories and so beef her up a bit.

Denise sorry to hear that the op has not sorted out your back trouble and landed you with bills from your insurance.

[coops 1,790]

Cathy, we tried that at the beginning of the year and it made her sick! I think the best we can do at the moment is to let her go at her own pace... she sometimes has pain when she eats.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

I feel for all of you who have ailing parents. I remember that time as being the hardest times of my life. Even when my husband died from an accident at age 36, watching my parents fade every time I saw them, just broke my heart so much. I kept their house in Arizona for 3 years even though I live in Oregon because I could not bear to part with their things and their house.

 

All of us are dealing with the same thing, weight gain. We are all veterans though. It drives me nuts that I was 139 this morning and my clothes don't fit. How is 135 all that different from 139? It just makes no sense to me that I can barely button my jeans with a 4 lb. difference.

 

I have a very large friend who is contemplating either gastric bypass or sleeve now that Medicare is finally paying for the sleeve. I am telling her of all the complications I know gastric bypass people face down the road. I know so many people who have gained all of their weight back, and deal with Iron infusions, and hypoglycemia , who have had gastric bypass. You can definitely eat around the sleeve, but at least we are all healthy!

 

I have to drive 3 hours next week to see a malpractice attorney. I really hope he can convince my first surgeon's insurance company that they need to pay my medical bills. He said he has gone against every malpractice insurance company any doctor can have. I really hope he can help me.

 

I deleted a couple people from the group who have never posted. wish Brown and Sarsar and Kelly from Seattle would  would check in!

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Denise, I am under goal weight but am a size or two bigger than I was. It is because I am not as fit. My plan for spring/summer is to get back on the fitness wagon!!!

I am heading to Costa Rica tonight ladies... looking forward to it!

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Coops, if Ensure didn't work, what about Boost? Perhaps just different enough?

I have decided to do the difficult thing and do a hard reset, attempt to go back to post-op eating. It's like quitting drugs cold turkey - there will be a brief period of physical distress followed by a long coming-to-terms experience. I will have to address head hunger again, "work the program" physically and mentally. I use the parlance of the addiction community because, for me, I understand that my use of food is to cope and sooth and mask, just like any drug user.

I will allow myself unlimited coffee and tea, but no more than 1 serving of coconut milk (used as creamer) per day. I already don't use sugar - I use liquid stevia. Coops, do you have that over there? It is a godsend for sweets lovers, 4 drops in my huge morning cuppa makes it very sweet.

Anyone else that has gained back 10 lbs or more, have you noticed where it has landed? Mine has almost completely gone to my lower stomach, it is really really awful...

In an hour I will have a Protein Shake and dinner will be some ground organ meat pate and chicken salad.< /p>

Send positive vibes my way!!

[UK Cathy 977]

Globe I'm just the same all my added back weight has gone to my stomach, I just said this to hubby today! I too need to get things in hand and I'm going to try and have 2 Protein Drinks and a light meal each day for the next week and see how I go on. The wine, bread, and anything else sweet has to go. I also need to up the exercise. I'm off work for the week but I'm unsure if that is a good or bad thing. Work could fill up the hours and stop me eating. Home could make me try and get back to good habits. We will see.

[Georgia 2,908]

Hey, All! I've managed to "catch up" to all the last few weeks that I hadn't read. Sounds like everyone is dealing with pretty much all the same thing. We've all regained some and dealing with LIFE issues. One of my daily Devotionals said it really well for me and hit me smack in the face! "Stop fantasizing about an uncluttered life and accept each day as it comes and find Me in the midst of it!" For me, that spoke volumes.

I think I have gone through a lot over the past years and felt, "Okay, why can't I just have a peaceful, settled life?" LOL. Yeah, right!!

I have managed to get myself back on track and shed 6 pounds but still need to lose another 10-12. I've found that using Protein Shakes (I Never did before) and upping my Protein and exercise has helped me get back to manageable routine. Broke the constant snacking/grazing finally. I really want to get this extra off before Summer.

And I'm in agreement, even at weight I was before I'm not as Small As I was. At least, that's what my tops tell me. I immediately add boobs and gut! ????

Have fun CGJ! Envious!

Coops, like Globe maybe a different brand of something. Difficult to watch them grow old, isn't it?

Dee, APRIL FOOLS! Ha! My scale will do that to me sometimes.

OD, what a mess!! Praying your pain ceases and the attorney usable to help you out.

[Chimera 644]

Hi ladies! Checking in - I think it took me about 20 minutes to find the thread! Why don't we get notifications any longer I wonder - is that some new 'premium feature'?

I am up as well and its all in my lower tummy, thighs and rump - we went to whistler and it was agony on the knees. There was little snow so those bunny slopes where at the top of the mountain, which is just a bit steeper than the true baby slopes. Lets just say I didn't do too much skiing. Then I got some gastro-intestinal bug that had me vomiting and feverish for 3 days (isn't it sick when we are happy that we cant keep anything down lol).

 

We are going to Mexico in a couple of months and I am dreading it a bit - its so funny how perception influences our feelings - when I was on the way down, this weight had me elated - now that it is a bit higher than that lowest low - I think myself a miserable failure. Ah well - need to take the advice from my own signature

 

Hope you are all well - I too though I need a revision - feel like my sleeve is broken lol.