gain goal regain How was your 5:2 day today?

[M2G 1,836]

Coops, I love that instead of wallowing in the sadness you went out and let loose a bit, and just enjoyed life. Really loving all the sentiments the last few days of self-love and CELEBRATING what we have. We are blessed, and even though we have sad, difficult, heartbreaking, awful things happen to us (a lot of which is out of our control) we still soldier on, and trying to find the silver lining. Hugs to everyone who hurting right now.

Wanda, you might need to add a bit of cardio to your Curves workout. I always felt like cardio helped burn the calories, but the weight training is so good for your body/muscles/overall shape, etc. Curves is most definitely light on the cardio. Even if just once a week you hit Zumba or a good fast-paced walk, that cardio will help burn some extra cals.

Georgia, I just want to say you are such a ray of sunshine and I sincerely appreciate you!

Sheryl, Mia sounds like a beautiful horse. I'm glad you had a good ride.

Florinda, I have "access" to a scale and I've simply ignored it. Kind of terrified about getting back up there...lol. I've been eating like total crap lately and I know it's stress eating and I know that stress eating does ME no good, does the SITUATION no good, but some old habits just don't die. Ugh. I'm sure whenever you get back on the scale you will be pleasantly surprised.

Our pup is still surviving...today is day 6 of basically intensive care. Yesterday they had to run an NG tube to her stomach to suction out some of the (for lack of a technical wording) GUT juice that was making her sick. Today they plan to trickle feed her through that tube. I did ask the Vet ---flat-out--- give me a % of her chance for survival and she said 90% chance for survival. Which is encouraging. Also we found out in CO it's against the law to sell/or adopt a puppy before the age of 8 weeks. I think we are going to end up getting some monetary help from Petsmart (I sure hope so because we don't have $5,000 just laying around for this sweet baby) so keep your fingers crossed that it works out and we don't have to take legal action. Sigh.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Seems like many people went through sadness while losing weight. I was OVERJOYED and while i definately felt some ups and downs due to the hormonal stuff, it was all very up. I think sometimes I am having a delayed reaction - some old grief at life just not turning out quite the way I had "dreamed" in some ways.

Steven is also sure i still have menopause mood swings and also agreed that skipping the meds is a good way to go (if i can). What he told me is that I am normally very even tempered/generally positive mood but I have definately had more ups and downs recently... not just my imagination. I think the key is that I feel what I feel ... but to still keep the eye on the prize and be aware of how great so many things really ARE. I can do that, but it doesn't stop me from some sadness too.

I went out and spent the day with two girlfriends who are my exact age.... both less than thrilled with married life at the moment. The complaint is basically the same - finally at the point in life where we have money and freedom to go out and enjoy life and all he wants to do is sit on the couch and get in worse shape. They are both horse women so are fit and active and their husbands were fit too... until middle age. Now they feel held back with men who are just no fun at all. I feel bad for them, but it also made me grateful that I no longer have that anchor feeling. It also made me realize why I am so hesitant about this David guy - i don't actually care that his politics run so conservative, what I hate is the ranting. I don't think I should have to endure repeated ranting since it is not like we are married or anything...LOL

Ate ALOT yesterday but still weighed 146 this morning. I need to have some light eating days this week though...

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Nice to hear from you all and all your perspectives.

.. special optimistic heads up about the puppy, PetSmart seriously need to step up and help with the bills.... how about a free insurance plan as well as some money for bills after she pulls through for a start?

I am going to my 3 year check up after work today. My labs are in, and they look OK, the cholesterol is still up a little.... I really don't want to go onto statins.... normal/high is 200 and I was 207......

[sarsar 824]

Hello friends. I've been reading but quiet. I had a rough week last week emotionally and I ate like crap all week which didn't help me feel better. Back at it today and fasting.

When I was obese I kept myself covered with fat so that I didn't have to deal with things and it kept me invisible. Then I lost a bunch of weight after surgery. I was around 165/170 and I still felt like I was keeping that last little bit of weight to keep covered up and to not quite let go of everything and deal with everything I needed to deal with. Now that the weight and extra "covering" is gone I am trying to deal with stuff. It's hard and to be honest, it sucks. I'm just trying to figure it all out. I know most of you have been there and can understand.

I almost feel like I'm going through a mid life crisis. Does this happen at 41? I want something more but I just don't know what it is and that makes me feel empty inside. I have a great life, I should be happy and content but yet I am searching for something. I have a feeling this all goes back to me becoming a mom so young. I was supposed to be at college when my daughter was born. All of my friends were at school and I had so been looking forward to being there with them. Then life changed. Now that my kids are getting older I am looking for something...I will figure it out, I have faith that I will figure it all out eventually.

[Georgia 2,908]

Nice to hear from you all and all your perspectives. .. special optimistic heads up about the puppy, PetSmart seriously need to step up and help with the bills.... how about a free insurance plan as well as some money for bills after she pulls through for a start? I am going to my 3 year check up after work today. My labs are in, and they look OK, the cholesterol is still up a little.... I really don't want to go onto statins.... normal/high is 200 and I was 207......

Good luck to you! I know you have worked hard this past six-eight months to get where you are today!!!

[Georgia 2,908]

Hello friends. I've been reading but quiet. I had a rough week last week emotionally and I ate like crap all week which didn't help me feel better. Back at it today and fasting. When I was obese I kept myself covered with fat so that I didn't have to deal with things and it kept me invisible. Then I lost a bunch of weight after surgery. I was around 165/170 and I still felt like I was keeping that last little bit of weight to keep covered up and to not quite let go of everything and deal with everything I needed to deal with. Now that the weight and extra "covering" is gone I am trying to deal with stuff. It's hard and to be honest, it sucks. I'm just trying to figure it all out. I know most of you have been there and can understand. I almost feel like I'm going through a mid life crisis. Does this happen at 41? I want something more but I just don't know what it is and that makes me feel empty inside. I have a great life, I should be happy and content but yet I am searching for something. I have a feeling this all goes back to me becoming a mom so young. I was supposed to be at college when my daughter was born. All of my friends were at school and I had so been looking forward to being there with them. Then life changed. Now that my kids are getting older I am looking for something...I will figure it out, I have faith that I will figure it all out eventually.

I relate to what you said. I don't think mine comes from a "should have been" feeling of loss mine right now is the feeling of what is ahead.

 

I, too, have a really good life. Good home, husband, kids doing okay , 3 great grand kids but turning 60 and my hubs at 65 seemed to kinda push me into a restless state that I want to do stuff NOW, knowing that my "window" of great health and mobility has a timeframe but I know that I also am held right now almost resisting two grands while my daughter tries to finish nursing school. I feel like I've spent the last 10 years of my life taking care of all the others and not sure how I feel about it all

 

I will be okay and "this too shall pass"but I have been doing the same thing. Reached my 5:2 goal, and in the last few weeks I think I have set out to sabotage myself! Old habits of "feeding" my mood crops up and I allow myself to slide into mindless carbing/snacking.

 

Now, I am fasting tomorrow and fasted last week 2 days but I have been eating too many calories/carbs otherwise. Determined NOT to lose any more ground.

 

Chin up. You are a great lady!!!!

[sarsar 824]

Cathy, glad you had a good time on your vacation. Now to get back in the groove of things again!

Sue, sounds like your time off is already filled with things to do. Try to have some fun, too!

Sheila, sorry about the puppy. I hope you get things figured out and get help with those vet bills. Keep us posted.

Wanda, I love, love, love, reading what you write. Makes me feel like there is hope out there for me to be joyful and happy! Thanks for your words. Sorry for your loss. I hope you are able to help the young man you are talking to.

Florinda, hope you are getting settled into your new place. Doesn't anyone around there have a scale that you can step on?

Sheryl, have you heard from the new guy yet? Are you going to see him again?

Dorrie, how are you doing? Haven't heard from you in a while. Hope you are ok. Let us know.

Denise, how are things going with Bill? Did you talk to him yet about needing your space?

Kim, let us know what the dr says. I hope you don't have to go on meds. Could be worse though, without the surgery I am sure you would be on many more meds!

Sheryl and Florinda, I know you have both asked me some questions about my body fat and training. Sheryl, when I look at pictures of you I don't see you as you see yourself. I see your body as proportionate and little. I don't look at you and see your top half looking big at all. I wish I could see you in person to be able to get a better look and be able to answer your question better. What I can suggest is to work on building muscle in your legs and butt. That will give you the illusion of being more proportionate (did I spell that correctly? I am terrible at spelling and a red line didn't show up under the word...lol) Since you cannot change the way your body is made, creating an illusion is what works best. I am much bigger in my hips/butt. My hips measure 13 inches bigger than my waist and 3 inches bigger than my chest. I'm guessing you can't tell as much from the picture, although, to me I see a huge difference between my top half and lower half. Because I am strong on top, I believe that makes me look more evened out.

I did notice my biggest loss in body fat from losing the last 20 pounds. I'm don't think it's just losing weight but I think it's being able to move easier and being able to do a lot more in the way of really perfecting my exercising.

Sheryl, I hope you continue to work with a trainer that is able to help you. Don't give up on it. It may take a little while to find the right one but I can say that if you do it will benefit you greatly! Our bodies are so used to moving incorrectly from all of the extra weight. We have to train ourselves on how to use our muscles again.

Florinda, I do not use a lot of weights for lifting. Mostly, just body weight. A ton of body weight movements and exercises along with cardio. In the past I have lifted, I even trained with a body builder lady that had huge muscles, she was so big she was manly looking. I don't train with her anymore but I did love the heavy lifting. I didn't care to look like her but I did like the feeling I had from lifting heavy. Once in a while now I will life heavy, maybe once or so a month. The muscle you see in the pics is mostly from body weight exercises.

[Georgia 2,908]

Oh yeah, and M2G and SarSar and Florinda, I'm like that too! If I'm not "good" I tend to ignore the scale as I do with my Amex Bill! ha!!

 

Sheryl, now see that's what I was doing. Just "sorta" 5:2 and holding steady then BOOM, I can't seem to quit eating all day long!!

 

Wanda, so sorry to hear about the loss of such a young adult. Senseless sometimes. Praying for your family. Your compassion shines through.

 

Coops and Cathy. I've been following the flooding/weather in that area. Have a friend that works with a team that goes into disaster regions who may be coming to Help out. He finds out soon.

 

It's cold here again! Smhh. Guess I should have known it would be but after 70s this weekend, got spoiled. But I DID get a mani/pedi today and it feels soooo good to have smooth heels again and pretty nails. I guess it was worth the $$85!!

 

)

[sarsar 824]

Hello friends. I've been reading but quiet. I had a rough week last week emotionally and I ate like crap all week which didn't help me feel better. Back at it today and fasting. When I was obese I kept myself covered with fat so that I didn't have to deal with things and it kept me invisible. Then I lost a bunch of weight after surgery. I was around 165/170 and I still felt like I was keeping that last little bit of weight to keep covered up and to not quite let go of everything and deal with everything I needed to deal with. Now that the weight and extra "covering" is gone I am trying to deal with stuff. It's hard and to be honest, it sucks. I'm just trying to figure it all out. I know most of you have been there and can understand. I almost feel like I'm going through a mid life crisis. Does this happen at 41? I want something more but I just don't know what it is and that makes me feel empty inside. I have a great life, I should be happy and content but yet I am searching for something. I have a feeling this all goes back to me becoming a mom so young. I was supposed to be at college when my daughter was born. All of my friends were at school and I had so been looking forward to being there with them. Then life changed. Now that my kids are getting older I am looking for something...I will figure it out, I have faith that I will figure it all out eventually.

I relate to what you said. I don't think mine comes from a "should have been" feeling of loss mine right now is the feeling of what is ahead.

I, too, have a really good life. Good home, husband, kids doing okay , 3 great grand kids but turning 60 and my hubs at 65 seemed to kinda push me into a restless state that I want to do stuff NOW, knowing that my "window" of great health and mobility has a timeframe but I know that I also am held right now almost resisting two grands while my daughter tries to finish nursing school. I feel like I've spent the last 10 years of my life taking care of all the others and not sure how I feel about it all

I will be okay and "this too shall pass"but I have been doing the same thing. Reached my 5:2 goal, and in the last few weeks I think I have set out to sabotage myself! Old habits of "feeding" my mood crops up and I allow myself to slide into mindless carbing/snacking.

Now, I am fasting tomorrow and fasted last week 2 days but I have been eating too many calories/carbs otherwise. Determined NOT to lose any more ground.

Chin up. You are a great lady!!!!

Georgia,

I will be okay and "this too shall pass"but I have been doing the same thing. Reached my 5:2 goal, and in the last few weeks I think I have set out to sabotage myself! Old habits of "feeding" my mood crops up and I allow myself to slide into mindless carbing/snacking.

Yes, yes, YES!!!! That's how I feel. Those old feelings of, "I don't deserve this, and "this won't last", are creeping in. But, I do believe I am strong enough to overcome these things!

WE CAN DO THIS!!!

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Sarsar...I relate I have many wonderful things and people. ..I am blessed but there is a hole where my heart should be.

[sarsar 824]

Oh yeah, and M2G and SarSar and Florinda, I'm like that too! If I'm not "good" I tend to ignore the scale as I do with my Amex Bill! ha!!

Sheryl, now see that's what I was doing. Just "sorta" 5:2 and holding steady then BOOM, I can't seem to quit eating all day long!!

Wanda, so sorry to hear about the loss of such a young adult. Senseless sometimes. Praying for your family. Your compassion shines through.

Coops and Cathy. I've been following the flooding/weather in that area. Have a friend that works with a team that goes into disaster regions who may be coming to Help out. He finds out soon.

It's cold here again! Smhh. Guess I should have known it would be but after 70s this weekend, got spoiled. But I DID get a mani/pedi today and it feels soooo good to have smooth heels again and pretty nails. I guess it was worth the $$85!!

)

Love that you got a mani and pedi! Hate that I had to see a pic of your feet. I hate feet so much! lol

[sarsar 824]

Sarsar...I relate I have many wonderful things and people. ..I am blessed but there is a hole where my heart should be.

YES!!! Why? This is what I keep asking myself, why? I don't have an answer yet...maybe I need therapy. I want to be happy and I want to be content. I think I need to learn to be content first...

[feedyoureye 3,087]

Met with the Doc and Nut today. They were over the moon(I wished I had asked what the average weight loss at 3 years is at the office...). Only suggestions were more Protein (at least 80), I can eat more on regular days and less on fast days if it evens out to 80. Take Vitamins with some Iron, not because my iron is low at all, but they are looking into the distant future and iron levels in the long run. They said they would feel better if I had Breakfast on fast days.

Great post Georgia! No way you look bigger on the bottom!

That empty spot.The thing that fills it up for me a bit is bird watching. I am thrilled, I cry, I just feel so much when I am communing with the birds/nature. It fills me with wonder, grief, I feel small and privy to the secret life of birds and animals. The feelings that "fill the hole"are not just happy or nice... they are the full gamut of feelings all rolled together. I think taking the treasure gained from filling the hole needs to be shared somehow. I am taking photos that I share, and hope to become a better person from my exploits.... and share that somehow... I want to die with no regrets.

[Globetrotter 1,340]

I have been rigorously fasting lately and this has led to a lot of free time when I would have otherwise been eating and it also strips bare my impetus for the eating in the first place. I self-medicated for 15 years with food in the same way that opiate addicts do, to numb, to ignore, to bliss out, to feel SOMETHING OTHER than what was truly going on, be it physical or psychological pain relief, the altered state. I'm pretty convinced that I physiologically actually did not feel a lot of things, because of the fat. Now I feel everything, bumps, bruises, sore joints from contact with a hard surface (no padding). Sorrow, anger, lust...

I believe we have phantom pains, like someone who has lost a limb but is convinced it is still there.

Sarah, can you give me some examples of these bodyweight exercises? I do squats regularly but still have yet to manage a single "real" push up :/

Sheryl, you sound so lost, I really hope you will consider concerted efforts with therapy, specifically a therapist with experience helping adults come to terms with childhood trauma.

[coops 1,790]

Great news from the doc Kim... it is good to hear. I love the idea of being with nature and learning from it; sounds (and must feel) tranquil.

To fill any 'gaps or holes' I use art - if I am feeling like I need to express myself in another way, I draw. I think I am lucky because I don't feel the need to do it a lot... but when I feel that something is missing, I pick up my pencil and find something to draw - normally a portrait... I just love looking at faces - not sure why.

Girls, I am not sure that the feeling of emptiness is due to weight loss - perhaps I am being naive? I might be looking at things from a different angle. None of use are 'very' young and I mean early twenties (although we look and feel younger than we are. Florinda I think you are the youngest?). We are also intelligent beings therefore we ask questions and we don't take things at face value.

We all seem intuitive and that often leads to wanting answers that might not be there? I suppose for me my perspective of life has changed... my young dream of what adulthood would be like was wrong but that is ok. The experiences I have had, I have learnt from and they have made me who I am; good or bad.

Are these feelings or gaps/holes unanswered questions? Are we perfectionists that will never accept what we have as perfect? I don't know!

If I am talking cr*p - just say!